tomsteve

"Everyone goes out in this area and drinks."

even all the people at the AA meetings?

behindblueyes

Let me mention quickly that I broke my tib/fib and ankle in a bad accident in Sept. I am still using a cane to get around and I appreciate all the exercise advice but I have a huge titanium rod up my leg.

I walk about a mile without severe pain on a good day.

Anyway, I placed that friend on block (not the jail friend, the other enabler). She harassed me to go out last night then asked me tonight if I would go out with her. I think she's out of friends.

As far as the "Everyone goes out in this area and drinks." idea, any girl or guy I have ever met at work or in college has never asked me to go out to meet at the mall and shop (that is for teens here) or to go out to meet at the library and you would get strange looks if you did. The motto of my city is literally "Football town with a Drinking Problem".

Done4today

Since I have stopped drinking, the "normal" population don't drink that much or even often. I don't have a problem going to bars with friends. I don't go unless I have a non drinking reason to be there. Anyway, when I am at the bar I pay attention to who is drinking what and amount. Surprising most have two maybe three drinks over a 3 or 4 hour period. People not like us just don't drink much.

Delilah1

Hi Behind Blue Eyes,

Since exercise is off the table for a while how about other hobbies: book clubs, class at the local community college, an online class, photography, volunteering... there are so many things out there. Since I am 46, I am goi g with 40 is still very young!!

mirage

Yes, 40 is young! You mentioned you're a single parent. I've met most of my friends through my kids. My friends are parents of my kids' friends. I don't know how old you child/children are, but I might suggest getting involved in school stuff. They'll love it and you'll meet people! Volunteer to chaperone a field trip, or set up for a concert. When they get older, it's even easier. Your child is in choir? Join the choir boosters! Your child plays soccer? Join the soccer boosters! I now go to breakfast once a week with ladies I've met this way and some our families are even taking a cruise together for senior year spring break. Anyway...fellow parents are good folks to hook up with, just find ones whose focus isn't getting drunk! Good luck, don't lose hope. There's a ton of people out there who don't care about drinking.

August252015

After my dr gave me a year, 18 mo to live if I kept going like I was, I quit last Feb at 39. Celebrated 40 sober and it was fantastic. At almost a year, I know only sober birthdays are ahead and am very grateful.

It takes what it takes to get each of us to the quitting point, and it is certainly not to late at 40. Good luck.

MsCooterBrown

I understand so much of your post BBE! I live in a population of 3200. And once again...most people here DO drink for entertainment. Lots of bars that are always packed. I believe when you quit drinking it makes others look at how much they are drinking. Some can't or won't stop so they try to get you back into the group to make them feel more normal. OR I am just thinking this and need therapy! We don't have other outlets or groups. I thought about that meet me up or whatever it is called but have to drive 70 miles to get there. I get that this sounds like excuses only. I think you have to live in a small rural community to understand your options are extremely limited. I do quiet things like read...try out new recipes...spend A LOT of time on SR these days. Once springtime and summer come around I will be able to get out and travel more. The snow and the wind make it impossible to get around if you value your life. Lots of ground blizzards and you can't even see the pavement of the interstate.
I find that once you surround yourself with bar people...all they have is drinking on their minds. I hope it gets better for you...I do understand.