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-   -   Well Wishes and Holiday Rant (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/alcoholism/402775-well-wishes-holiday-rant.html)

otter 01-02-2017 03:12 AM

Well Wishes and Holiday Rant
 
First let me say I hope everyone who is on the sobriety wagon made it through the holidays. We all know it can be a challenging time of year. If you're not on the wagon, hop on. There's plenty of room.

Second, and I'm sure this has been brought up a million times but why do people get offended when you're not drinking. Granted it's not everyone but old acquaintances that you used to drink with become genuinely offended if you're not consuming alcohol.

After smiling and walking away from one guy twice who was slurring and cross eyed I became so irate that I said "think I'm coming down with the flu" and fake sneezed on him which finally did the trick.

These aren't people close enough to me that I feel the obligation to explain my drinking problem. When you say "I'm driving" they slur "well one ain't gonna hurt cha".

I'm 40 years old (and will be next birthday too :D ) and they are as well. It's not like we're in high school any longer. Anyone else out there that deals with people like this? Luckily it's only once or twice a year for me. How do you handle them?

:a043:

Ken33xx 01-02-2017 03:23 AM


Originally Posted by otter (Post 6272740)
...Second, and I'm sure this has been brought up a million times but why do people get offended when you're not drinking. Granted it's not everyone but old acquaintances that you used to drink with become genuinely offended if you're not consuming alcohol.


If you've got a friend who continuously harps on the fact you aren't drinking you might consider finding someone else to hang around.

If you've made it clear you're not drinking that should be the end of it. No need to go into any big explanation as to why you're not.

You said no and move on to something else.

Personally, I found I no longer hang out with old drinking buddies. Not because they tried to get me to drink but take away the booze we have little in common.

Dee74 01-02-2017 03:31 AM

I posted an article on this recently. Good tips at the end.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-us-drink.html

I've found more and more people don't drink when they get to my age and they don't need to know or care why.

Also helps to not be hanging around with drinking buddies.

D

otter 01-02-2017 04:02 AM


Originally Posted by Ken33xx (Post 6272747)
If you've got a friend who continuously harps on the fact you aren't drinking you might consider finding someone else to hang around.

If you've made it clear you're not drinking that should be the end of it. No need to go into any big explanation as to why you're not.

You said no and move on to something else.

Personally, I found I no longer hang out with old drinking buddies. Not because they tried to get me to drink but take away the booze we have little in common.

Normally I don't but it's kind of a catch-22 situation. Our social circles intersect and I'd be avoiding the people I do want to see. It's kinda like a bad divorce except from a wife or husband it's an old drinking buddy.

otter 01-02-2017 04:03 AM


Originally Posted by Dee74 (Post 6272757)
I posted an article on this recently. Good tips at the end.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-us-drink.html

I've found more and more people don't drink when they get to my age and they don't need to know or care why.

Also helps to not be hanging around with drinking buddies.

D

Thanks Dee. I'll most definitely check this out.

ScottFromWI 01-02-2017 05:57 AM


Originally Posted by otter (Post 6272801)
Normally I don't but it's kind of a catch-22 situation. Our social circles intersect and I'd be avoiding the people I do want to see. It's kinda like a bad divorce except from a wife or husband it's an old drinking buddy.

Getting sober requires tough choices sometimes, including changes to who we spend our time with. If this person is a threat to your sobriety you may need to simply avoid the entire "social circle" for a while.

DesertDawg 01-04-2017 09:39 PM

I've never really understood this...

I guess maybe I'm lucky, and maybe an exception, but whenever I told my friends I had stopped drinking , the reaction was always "good for you, man! But do you mind if *I* drink." And of course I never minded because other people drinking is neither here nor there, as it pertains to my drinking. My friends were always (and continue to be) supportive. Maybe it's because I am (and naturally my friends are) older than a lot of the people that seem to have this problem? I don't know. All I do know is that if I had a friend who thought they had a problem with substance abuse, I can't imagine being anything other than supportive if they quit that substance. Doesn't seem that difficult.

Never been an issue with me and my friends, and I don't care what 'acquaintances' think.

Upstairs 01-05-2017 10:31 AM

Seems like a pretty easy answer to me as to why drunks pester others to drink. Alcohol is making them so happy, they want you to drink and be happy too! And if they are intoxicated, it's more difficult to for them to tell if they're offending people or making them uncomfortable.

ardy 01-05-2017 10:35 AM

Stand Tall and Hold the High Ground.. No Thanks makes me very sick fast.. and I burp.. and they get a funny look.. my Blondie and Dagwood best.. yep..

Doug39 01-05-2017 10:59 AM

People that push others to drink are insecure and immature.


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