emmsie

Hey folks,

Is anyone else finding this time of year a bit tough? I am over 4.5 years in sobriety and a very grateful recovering alcoholic but my emotions aren't the best at present. I love my sober life and have so much to be thankful for (which I am) but I just find the hype around Christmas a bit much at times. My plan for Christmas Day is to be with my husband-to-be's family, who are all incredibly supportive and there will be no alcohol at the meal. How are other folks doing and what are your plans?

Wishing you all a safe, sober and happy Christmas.

Emma

Delilah1

I will be with my husband's family too. He is one of 8, so always lots of people at the holidays. My mom lives in NY, and I miss seeing her at this time of year, but technology makes that a little easier.

You have quite a bit of sobriety built up, not sure if you have read any of Rachel Black's books, she has written Sober is the New Black, a friend sent me this link this morning. It was a letter written to alcohol two years into her sobriety. It definitely describes how I have felt in the past.
https://www.theguardian.com/society/...-lover-alcohol

Hope you have a Very Merry Christmas!

❤️Delilah

Dee74

Hi Emmsie
I think a lot of people find this time of year hard. A lot of expectations, stress, and sometimes temptation or fear of missing out.

There is always support here tho.

Merry Christmas to you and yours

D

FenwayFaithful

This is my second holiday season in recovery but last year I was in treatment. I've been surprised at how difficult it has been. I had an early XMAS with my family in Boston then I fly back to Florida tomorrow and work both XMAS eve and XMAS day. Therefore, I avoided any gathering with alcohol but even so I've found it difficult. I mean really it's just another day but for whatever reason it hasn't been easy. I am glad I am not alone. I am glad you have such a supportive family who also won't be drinking for the holidays.

Gottalife

I will be spending Xmas with friends this year. Fairly quiet. Since getting sober I have generally enjoyed Xmas, I think because it was when I used to have my biggest disasters, and upset the most people.

I am not so keen on the commercial aspect, and I am not a great shopper, but I do like the social occasions and sharing a meal with friends. I like to pop into an AA meeting or two as well.

Soberwolf

I always find Christmas a lil bit tough not because I'm sober more I miss people who are no longer here but I know for a fact in my heart they wouldn't want me sad they want me to keep kicking ass sober

Emmsie congratulations on 4.5 years that's really awesome

NewRomanMan

I hate Christmas since my divorce. Just going to put my head down and plow thru it and stay sober.

BrendaChenowyth

Love it, D. I have been coping with some depression and demons this Christmas season, and the desire to drink pokes it's little head in and out from time to time, and I'm okay with that. I know that things are much better when we aren't nursing an around the clock hangover or lashing out at loved ones because alcohol is running the show.

Doug39

This will be my first sober Christmas Day since 1988.

My wife will still do the mimosas for breakfast, Baileys in her coffee, and gin and tonic all day (cause it smells like pine) but she will be drinking alone this year.

She will probably get obnoxiously drunk since she doesn't have to work the next day and I will probably end up sitting alone in another room a good part of the day.

Flyfisher125

I'm sorry Doug. I'm feeling the awkwardness of the holidays too. I'm thankful that my family is having an alcohol free dinner tonight, but I can't help but feel like I'm keeping others from having a good time. I didn't ask for it to be alcohol free and it's with a side of the family I don't know well. Feeling self conscious but not going to drink. Good luck to you Doug. Take timeouts on this thread as needed.

olow

I hate the hype of Christmas and have for decades. This year is particularly bad. I am going to plow through it as I have every other day recently. Moment by moment. I plan to keep it quiet.

shortstop81

I love Christmas, always have. But this year my emotions have been all over the place....lots of holiday blues. I chalk it up to being more emotional in general due to early recovery.

It all feels very bittersweet. I'm thankful for my sobriety, and knowing that my family gathering will be unmarred by my drinking. But it's also been a time of deep reflection for me.

Anyways. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays SR.

graced333

Hi - VERY hard time for me - but I will not drink and will be able to facetime my grandchildren sober! Now that is fun stuff!

HelenofTroy

Yup mixed emotions here. Even though it has been four years I am feeling the loss of my son more this Christmas than the past, probably because I am sober and because my daughter just moved away. Yesterday was a write-off. I didn't even get out of my pajamas. Now I have to clean, shop and cook for a family dinner today. Best get off the computer.

KAD

It was this season two years ago my drinking was really spiraling out of control. It was the last Christmas I got to spend with my kids. Much has changed for the better since then, but my relationship with the kids is still fractured and has a long way to go. For that reason, Christmas is not the most pleasant holiday for me. I'm just trying to make the best of it and get through it.

PhoenixJ

Prayers, 1000

HelenofTroy

Thanks PJ

PhoenixJ

zjw

i'm glad I can relate to others here on this thread. I"m having a tough go of it myself. I almost always do. growing up i'd hear stories of people who commit suicide during the holidays i never understood why it was one of the happier times of the year why would someone do such a thing? then i became an adult and had kids and started to understand.

Depression wise I've faired better this year then most.

I only had one trigger so far the old "aaaa why not get a little something and be a bit festive for the holiday ..." But it passed.

But really wants gotten me is its been verys tressful. and i've had a lot of things driving me to drink. I say that so others can understand I dont serously mean i wanna drink or that i might drink but that its the sort of stuff that typically would have made me drink in the past. This past week I bit off more hten I could chew. I did not go seeking this myself. But others in my life did and i kicked and screamed and said no this is too much this is to stressful and i just got resistance and more trouble and had to do it all anyhow.

I just gotta get through tommorrow then its dec 26th woohoo. But i got company in town all next week so it still wont be normal exactly in my house.

emmsie

Thanks for this, Delilah - I hadn't seen it but will look forward to reading. Hope you are having a peaceful Festive.