you gotta be careful even with good news
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Originally Posted by Gottalife 
Those sort of motives might have driven me to buy a bigger house at one time, and I think if I felt off about the deal, I might want to look at why I was considering such a move, what was it that was making me uncomfortable about it? Do I really need it, will I or someone else be better off as a result, does it make financial sense? Or is it just about doing something, anything, to try and feel better?
as far as financial sense, i was one of the few that believed never to buy beyond my means. when a lot of these people bought their mcmansions, only to lose their a$$ when the housing bubble popped, i knew i made the right choice by buying a place that was less than 1/4 of my monthly income. 12 years later, i've doubled my income and it just makes sense to do now.
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Lots of great advice here already Bulldog, and being an anxiety sufferer myself I can only reiterate that yep, sometimes change just makes things grind to a halt. That doesn't mean you can't get through it and there aren't tools you can use to help - which you are doing by posting and seeing your therapist too. Both of those are things I would have avoided when I was drinking and tried to simply drown out with alcohol.
One of the things I'm still working on in my struggles with anxiety is simply accepting that I'm an anxious person by nature. Just like I'm an alcohlic - it's something woven into the fabric of me that simply cannot be changed at it's core. That's not to say that I cannot find better ways to deal with anxiety and live a more comfortable life, but I do have to accept that some days I'm just going to be more anxious than others. I think when I initially sought help for my anxiety i wanted a "cure" - some kind of magic therapy or pill that would just make me not anxious anymore - and that of course does not exist. So yeah, there's that "acceptance" word again...but it really helps to seek it. I hope your move goes well and you find a really nice new place to call home.
One of the things I'm still working on in my struggles with anxiety is simply accepting that I'm an anxious person by nature. Just like I'm an alcohlic - it's something woven into the fabric of me that simply cannot be changed at it's core. That's not to say that I cannot find better ways to deal with anxiety and live a more comfortable life, but I do have to accept that some days I'm just going to be more anxious than others. I think when I initially sought help for my anxiety i wanted a "cure" - some kind of magic therapy or pill that would just make me not anxious anymore - and that of course does not exist. So yeah, there's that "acceptance" word again...but it really helps to seek it. I hope your move goes well and you find a really nice new place to call home.
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI
One of the things I'm still working on in my struggles with anxiety is simply accepting that I'm an anxious person by nature. Just like I'm an alcohlic - it's something woven into the fabric of me that simply cannot be changed at it's core. That's not to say that I cannot find better ways to deal with anxiety and live a more comfortable life, but I do have to accept that some days I'm just going to be more anxious than others. I think when I initially sought help for my anxiety i wanted a "cure" - some kind of magic therapy or pill that would just make me not anxious anymore - and that of course does not exist. So yeah, there's that "acceptance" word again...but it really helps to seek it. I hope your move goes well and you find a really nice new place to call home.
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Bulldog, I think I understand, but I'm not sure... Do you feel that this move is something you have earned through hard work? Do you *know* that you deserve the good things you attain in life?
Could your anxiety be because you're still looking back on your old life with guilt and perhaps shame.. Are you looking at what is before you and comparing it to the pain in your past? You're doing yourself a massive disservice.
That old life is GONE. You are creating a whole new life. You have nothing to be afraid of as long as you focus on what you want. I guarantee you if you focus on the fear of going backwards, you will go backwards. The universe only hears what you think about, it doesn't attach value to it, it just attracts that.
Start focusing your thoughts on abundance and forward momentum. You deserve it.
If you do not want to drink, specifically, you have to focus on thoughts that have nothing to do with drinking. "I'm not going to drink" to an impartial universe equates to "DRINK"!!!
Could your anxiety be because you're still looking back on your old life with guilt and perhaps shame.. Are you looking at what is before you and comparing it to the pain in your past? You're doing yourself a massive disservice.
That old life is GONE. You are creating a whole new life. You have nothing to be afraid of as long as you focus on what you want. I guarantee you if you focus on the fear of going backwards, you will go backwards. The universe only hears what you think about, it doesn't attach value to it, it just attracts that.
Start focusing your thoughts on abundance and forward momentum. You deserve it.
If you do not want to drink, specifically, you have to focus on thoughts that have nothing to do with drinking. "I'm not going to drink" to an impartial universe equates to "DRINK"!!!
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Originally Posted by BrendaChenowyth
Bulldog, I think I understand, but I'm not sure... Do you feel that this move is something you have earned through hard work? Do you *know* that you deserve the good things you attain in life?
Could your anxiety be because you're still looking back on your old life with guilt and perhaps shame.. Are you looking at what is before you and comparing it to the pain in your past? You're doing yourself a massive disservice.
Could your anxiety be because you're still looking back on your old life with guilt and perhaps shame.. Are you looking at what is before you and comparing it to the pain in your past? You're doing yourself a massive disservice.
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Originally Posted by thomas11
First, congratulations that's great news.
Second, stay calm and don't do anything regrettable (like drink). I assure you it will not be worth it.
Second, stay calm and don't do anything regrettable (like drink). I assure you it will not be worth it.
i spent the day helping my neighbor. he's almost 68 with no car and had to run a bunch of errands around town.
he's a Vietnam vet and we have a lot in common. i bought him a burger for lunch and we traded stories and had a good time.
I'm glad i did that.
thanks again to you all.
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I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted today. My faith in humanity gets a little stronger every time perfect strangers take time from their busy schedules to help another person in need.
I'm truly blessed to have this place.
I'm truly blessed to have this place.
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