Acheleus

I love sobriety. I guess I just am trying to process a lot of the chaos it caused in my life. Those old behaviors are now in a clear light and it frightens me to know that I drank in an unhealthy manner for a long time.

I guess I am just observing people who relapse and that scares me. I'm fairly isolated because I have had to protect my sobriety. I kind of wish I had seen my alcoholism for what it was sooner but I have made progress dealing with past mistakes.

I feel more responsible and mature but I don't know if that is from sobriety or emotional growth. I guess it is both.

So I'm not bored with sobriety but my perspective of it is changing. It is the necessary condition for my being able to be responsible, mature, and stable.

I feel like I may finally be growing up. Lots to do. Lots to catch up on.

I guess it just feels good to quit being a damn fool. I feel proud of my decision to make sobriety the most important thing in my life.

CAPTAINZING2000

You were their friend but, they weren't yours.

I would hate to have their religion

JamesfrmEngland

It's something mature, responsible adults do. Addiction is really just childish irresponsibility and the love of pleasure at the detriment of everything else. Which is not a problem depending on your morals.

teatreeoil007

Discontinuing the poisoning of the brain, body and spirit is a really big deal, no matter what age...but especially for those that have a problem with it. Some drinkers have the attitude, though, that everyone just needs to 'get it out of their system' and just quit drinking when they do. That type of thinking is what I hear from people who want to justify their own continuance of drinking. "Just gotta get it out of my system". Well now: the only reliable method of 'getting it out of the system' is to stop putting it in the system. Funny how the alcoholic thinking and justification takes over though....I'm glad you stopped poisoning yourself. That is no small thing.

Acheleus

I just got home from my Saturday night meeting. A lady gave me a really good speaker cd. I drove around listening to it and got pretty emotional. I could really relate to the speaker.

I'm glad I learned some stuff tonight.

soberlicious

I don't think there are just two ways that people respond when they quit drinking. I think there is an entire spectrum between "I quit and everything is rosy" and "I quit and I still struggle with so many issues".

In response to your question, I think quitting drinking is a big deal and is something that responsible, mature adults decide to do.

Dee74

I actually agree with Sobes - it is a big deal...and I think it's something responsible mature adults do.

Accepting the mantle of responsible mature adult was a big deal for this perennial teenager too

D

PhoenixJ

Yep- all of the above.

bradly22

The truth is that a lot of people just grown out of it and they move on to productive things like spending time with their families. On the other hand, there are those that quit and just don't know what to do now that they are not fixated on the bottle anymore. I myself was in this second category for a couple months because it felt unnatural not to be so focused on the bottle.

MIRecovery

You will hear a lot of things from people who say they have quit drinking. Pay attention to the ones that have stayed quit. Although there is some disagreement about what long term sobriety is 5+ years is a good place to start and there is statistical evidence to back this number up.

I would say that most people with 5+ years will tell you it is a very big deal. speaking for myself it was the biggest and most difficult thing I have ever done and continue to do

PhoenixJ

I hear some people call themselves recovered alcoholics. I am a recovering alcoholic. Long term? That equals not drinking up to that point. The term bears importance, yes- but a label I fear some in my experience use to gain admiration to stroke their ego. Some- not all.

MIRecovery

Ego stroking or not. 5+ years is an accomplishment that a very small percentage make it to. The knowledge gained in multiple years of sobriety is invaluable. I have multiple mentors with 20+ Years and I will credit their experience, knowledge, advice as being a corner stone of my recovery. They have gone before me. Through their failures they kept me from making the same mistakes. They have shown me how to have a balanced and happy life. I want what they have and you darn well better believe I listen to what they have to say.

Life has a very nasty habit of throwing some very bad curves at us and to have people that have made it through some very tough times sober is a resource not to be ignored

soberlicious

Well, I don't use the term alcoholic personally, but I am recovered from my addiction because I don't drink alcohol. If I were to drink again, I would quickly become re-addicted. Many people choose not to define themselves by an action they not longer engage in.

I agree with MIRecovery that people have successfully quit longterm have good experience to share. But even among those of us who haven't drank for many years, there will be different ways we got there. Really each individual can only share how they successfully put addiction behind them.

Gottalife

I'd have to say I became a responsible mature adult through a spiritual experience and growth subsequent to getting sober, not before.

As a drinker I was anything but mature and responsible. My emotional age was round 13, my medical psychiatric reports talk about someone who is childish, grandiose, opinionated, dishonest, a greedy self lover, self centred, irresponsible and selfish. Hardly the character of a mature adult. And the literature I have seen on the subject often seems to describe chronic hopeless alcoholics in the same general way.

The result of sobering up was the opportunity to develop into a mature responsible adult. The alternative would not have allowed me any of those things. I was only a few months away from the end when I stopped.

August252015

And there's an example of one view of addiction.

Me, I think about it differently. I truly believe that addiction is a disease, pure and simple. We do not choose to be alcoholics, we are in fact critically and potentially terminally ill, and beyond the whys and wherefores and surface reasons (ie, irresponsibility, joy, childishness, escapism, etc) lies the simple fact that we are sick. Morals, IMO and IME, have zero to do with us being sick.

Choice does come in as far as how we get treatment. Mental illness and addiction are widely debated topics- nature v nurture, choosing a sh*tty life of base and selfish behaviors v "being a grown up and decent person, d*mmit you jerk" and so on- and here is my bottom line: there is something I can do about my disease, regardless of where it came from or why I have it, and I am doing it.

How we look on the surface or to each other, is completely beside the point. AV's can get us mired in semantics and have us split hairs on everything under the sun. Sure, and adult "should" live a mature, responsible life- and that means countless things, and drinking (or not) safely is just one.

If being sober is making your life better- and your mind clearer and your overall life better for YOU - then that's enough reason to stay sober, IMO and IME. Then, you know, there's that terminal illness part I'd have going for me.

Keep going.

Delizadee

Ditto. The last time I went on a serious bender I was dealing with way too much to add drinking on top of it. I tried to kill myself and I meant it that time. I wanted out. I'm lucky to be alive.
This happened so many times. It's not just a huge deal. It's life or death to me. I really don't want to go back there shackled and bound to a path of death.
Life is tough but at least I give myself the option to live it and change things if I stick around. Alcohol seems to rob me of that choice. We are no longer friends.
I think there's a lot of factors that play into how people feel about and deal with recovery. Where we fall on the alcoholism spectrum, length of time, our mental health, the support and state of the rest of our lives. For some examples.