What's Moo?
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I'm sorry, Cow. I got excited when I read that post back on page 4, and I instantly posted a laughing emoticon.
Then I notice I had stepped on your newer posts on page 5, so I explained myself. I should have just deleted the post and left a period.
I have nothing pertinent to contribute. Sorry for the non sequitur!
Then I notice I had stepped on your newer posts on page 5, so I explained myself. I should have just deleted the post and left a period.
I have nothing pertinent to contribute. Sorry for the non sequitur!
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Glimmer, you always pertinent to me.Hi Sleepies.
Sorry, I having seizure symptom tonight, so I maybe not catching you humors ... ... or, maybe you just not humorous.
I keed! In other news, doctor official putting me on meal replacement, since I having such hard time eating. Hopeful will make me feel better as I know I not getting proper nutrient for long time now. It make me sad, like my body so broken it not can even deal with food now, but at least I will be getting the vitamins and such.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
That's good. Vitamin deficiencies can take a surprising toll on our equilibrium. I hope the new plan helps.
Have you gotten very far into the book yet? I'd be interested in knowing how an author breaks down the building blocks of being a person.
It doesn't sound like a typical pick-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps self-help book. I hope it does provide something concrete to consider, something that will maybe help you perceive human attributes differently--something that will be a genuine springboard for growth. I wonder what it can tell you that you don't already know.
What are you hoping for?
Have you gotten very far into the book yet? I'd be interested in knowing how an author breaks down the building blocks of being a person.
It doesn't sound like a typical pick-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps self-help book. I hope it does provide something concrete to consider, something that will maybe help you perceive human attributes differently--something that will be a genuine springboard for growth. I wonder what it can tell you that you don't already know.
What are you hoping for?
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Glimmer, my "development" was arrested at about age 8 from molestation. Since then, I just been a shambolic mess of disorders. Here I am at 51 and not has ever felt I truly "my self" you know? Like, who was I before all that and who I suppose to be after waking up at 51 and realizing I been disordered all my life.
The book not that helpful. Little bit though, but is too much, for me, about f*ck everybody just be you self. Mhmm, only I has no self to just be.
That not true, I has a self, it just, not, it, I, ... ... so yeah.
The book not that helpful. Little bit though, but is too much, for me, about f*ck everybody just be you self. Mhmm, only I has no self to just be.
That not true, I has a self, it just, not, it, I, ... ... so yeah.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I would have been surprised if the book had had anything really knew to say to you. From your description, it sounds as though it's trying to teach an unassertive person to up and roar like a lion.
Books tend to assume that everybody has an innate sense of personhood--they just offer either new features to adopt or better ways to harness it.
I think most of us just take our personhood for granted: "Of course I'm a person! What else would I be!" But I've never heard much in the way of definition.
I really identify with Descartes' basic foundation--"I think, therefore I am." I would expand it to "I emote, therefore I am."
But you wonder what your true base is like--what you would have been like without having had a lifetime of constant violent derailment.
Do you wonder how differently you would have perceived if the traumas hadn't happened?
I'm sure we can all think of components of personhood (thinking, emoting, etc.); but there is some sort of glue that binds them all together.
I looked "person" up at Dictionary.com. There were three definitions that were noteworthy:
1. (Sociology) An individual human being, especially with reference to his or her social relationships and behavioral patterns as conditioned by the culture.
So you are who you know, or you are what you do! Seems lacking.
2. (Philosophy) A self-conscious or rational being.
3. The actual self or individual personality of a human being.
The definitions seem circular: "a person is a self--a self is a person."
Seems we've gone around about this often on your threads before.
I'll end this post.
Books tend to assume that everybody has an innate sense of personhood--they just offer either new features to adopt or better ways to harness it.
I think most of us just take our personhood for granted: "Of course I'm a person! What else would I be!" But I've never heard much in the way of definition.
I really identify with Descartes' basic foundation--"I think, therefore I am." I would expand it to "I emote, therefore I am."
But you wonder what your true base is like--what you would have been like without having had a lifetime of constant violent derailment.
Do you wonder how differently you would have perceived if the traumas hadn't happened?
I'm sure we can all think of components of personhood (thinking, emoting, etc.); but there is some sort of glue that binds them all together.
I looked "person" up at Dictionary.com. There were three definitions that were noteworthy:
1. (Sociology) An individual human being, especially with reference to his or her social relationships and behavioral patterns as conditioned by the culture.
So you are who you know, or you are what you do! Seems lacking.
2. (Philosophy) A self-conscious or rational being.
3. The actual self or individual personality of a human being.
The definitions seem circular: "a person is a self--a self is a person."
Seems we've gone around about this often on your threads before.
I'll end this post.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I just shook the cobwebs out of my head.
You want to get to the bottom of yourself: your true, untarnished essence.
What if there's no such pure thing, and your essence is what you are right now? What if there is not actually a distant past to tease out of the mess?
I know that you were just a child once and horrible, destructive things happened afterward to skew your responses (I respond, therefore I am? I initiate, therefore I am?).
But what if children by nature aren't so idyllic?
As a Christian, I believe in original sin: that is, we're born messed up until something happens to redeem us.
Children are not necessarily more virtuous than adults in spirit--just in degree. They are not so much innocent as simple and uncomplicated.
Clearly your father propelled you into horrific new depths of evil that even an adult wouldn't be equipped to survive, much less a child.
I understand that your original self was less broken and more emotionally capable than your "after" self.
But maybe even your undamaged child was not such a bowl of cherries!
Maybe all people, sweet, simple children included, default by nature to being little ***** when they think they can get away with it?
I wonder if you are longing for a time and place that never actually existed on this plane.
Maybe I've scampered too far down the rabbit hole.
You want to get to the bottom of yourself: your true, untarnished essence.
What if there's no such pure thing, and your essence is what you are right now? What if there is not actually a distant past to tease out of the mess?
I know that you were just a child once and horrible, destructive things happened afterward to skew your responses (I respond, therefore I am? I initiate, therefore I am?).
But what if children by nature aren't so idyllic?
As a Christian, I believe in original sin: that is, we're born messed up until something happens to redeem us.
Children are not necessarily more virtuous than adults in spirit--just in degree. They are not so much innocent as simple and uncomplicated.
Clearly your father propelled you into horrific new depths of evil that even an adult wouldn't be equipped to survive, much less a child.
I understand that your original self was less broken and more emotionally capable than your "after" self.
But maybe even your undamaged child was not such a bowl of cherries!
Maybe all people, sweet, simple children included, default by nature to being little ***** when they think they can get away with it?
I wonder if you are longing for a time and place that never actually existed on this plane.
Maybe I've scampered too far down the rabbit hole.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
LOL!
Cow, I left here for an hour to go vote (yes, it took that long), but I couldn't get my mind off your thread. I feel like I should have been like Job's friends--as they were in the very beginning.
At first when they saw Job so horribly afflicted, they grieved together and simply sat silently by his side for seven days.
Then they opened their big mouths--and the rest is history.
After he vindicated Job, God basically ripped them all a new one.
I hope if I've said something unhelpful that you'll forgive me.
Cow, I left here for an hour to go vote (yes, it took that long), but I couldn't get my mind off your thread. I feel like I should have been like Job's friends--as they were in the very beginning.
At first when they saw Job so horribly afflicted, they grieved together and simply sat silently by his side for seven days.
Then they opened their big mouths--and the rest is history.
After he vindicated Job, God basically ripped them all a new one.
I hope if I've said something unhelpful that you'll forgive me.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Glimmer, I not able to be at computer today due to seizure, so I not read you messages yet, but has to pop on to say you is never need for forgiveness from me as I trust you intention completely. I come back and read later.
I come back and read later.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
I just being quiet, Glimmer. My depressions is shifting again, in a way is hard to explain. Is moving from just super dark gloom to visceral sick feeling of fire inside, like when something really, really bad is gonna happen and is nothing you can do. It come for no reason in waves this dread that explode out from my insides. Is absolute torment.
But other than that, everything great.
But other than that, everything great.
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