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Five Weeks: Some random questions...

Old 10-18-2016, 02:18 PM
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Five Weeks: Some random questions...

1) I am sleeping like a baby, which is great, but I am finding I need a solid 8-hours/night. No problems waking up at 4am, but I am down right shot by 7:30pm. Is this normal? Is this a sign that I am still healing?

2) I'm a bit edgy. Not like I was when I drank, but a bit on the paranoid side of things. Thoughts on this?

3) I have this burning desire to express myself in an artistic way. I'm not about to wax poetic or anything, but I feel like I need to be creating something.... can't put my finger on it. Perhaps something I've kept buried and its trying to come out??

4) Thirst. I seem to still drink a lot. Water, seltzer, coffee. Its not as bad as it was when I first sobered up, but the frequent bathroom trips can be annoying to say the least. Is this normal?

Thanks.
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Old 10-18-2016, 02:44 PM
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1. Yep, you are most likely still healing it took months for my sleep cycle to normalize - feel fortunate to have full nights of sleep at this point
2. Again, most likely your mind healing and getting used to not being constantly depressed from alchohol all the time. In a sense your mind is "waking back up"
3. Could very well be - run with it and try to create something
4. Yep, drinking more will make you go to the bathroom more ;-) Many of us lived in a state of constant dehydration when we drank.

If any of the above seem to be causing serious problems, seeing a doctor is never a bad idea of course - but yep - 5 weeks s in you are bound to still be dealing with multiple issues. Think of how far you've come though!
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Old 10-18-2016, 03:06 PM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
5 weeks s in you are bound to still be dealing with multiple issues. Think of how far you've come though!

Yeah, I keep telling myself that!!
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Old 10-18-2016, 03:36 PM
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Heck, sounds like my world. Has nothing to do even with healing. I am healed from alcohol effects by a looong shot. Being busy is tiring. I like to rise early, so I go down early. You are now just coming to life again. "Real life" with real feelings and emotions that are not chemically influenced. I think that may be where you are getting your creative bent. I would say take that and run with it. If anything, sounds like you are in a good place at 5 weeks.
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Old 10-18-2016, 03:37 PM
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1- Yes, seems very normal to me.
2- Interesting that you put edgy and paranoid togater in #2 because they are nearly always related. If you often tend to detect hostility in others there is a high likelihood that you are "projecting" it onto them. You could in fact be seeing what is in yourself. This is not always true, but it's worth taking a long hard look at.
3- This is VERY healthy IMO and an excellent sign of progress. Satisfiy this instinct with a well chosen subject. A sense of meaning and purpose is a powerful thing.
4- Likely not a big deal. Your body probably needs extra fluids but check with your doctor if you continue to have a concern.
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Old 10-18-2016, 03:47 PM
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The paranoid thing.... maybe I'm into government "conspiracy theories" way too much. I guess I see everything as a hidden agenda. My workplace is really thick with corporate politics and that doesn't help the way I see things outside of work.

I'm not saying that everyone has it out for me, but everyone has a secret agenda...

Just sayin'.
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Old 10-18-2016, 05:04 PM
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I have had the same experience with sleeping much better yet at the same time needing sleep seemingly more than I did before. There's some kind of physiological reason why this happens, damned if I know what it is. lol

I feel like my brain works better, and that means I express myself better, I solve problems better, but I am more... watchful, cautious... I think I am a better reader of people now and very critical of my own emotional responses to things. I don't think I am more paranoid but I am less naive and trusting, and my emotions can not be manipulated by others as easily. I'm more in control of myself, maybe to the point of seeming UNemotional, but I am cool with that.

I always have to have a tasty beverage on hand. I haven't lost any weight, in fact I've gained weight, because of all the liquid calories, plus having my appetite back. I do at least a pot of coffee myself at work. I notice my bladder is more sensitive.. lol.. But I used to be able to drink up and then go to sleep / pass out and wake up with a full bladder in the morning.. now I stop drinking (water) and my kidneys continue to make urine and I feel uncomfortable and get up hourly until I fall asleep.
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Old 10-19-2016, 08:53 AM
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Originally Posted by steve-in-kville View Post
The paranoid thing.... maybe I'm into government "conspiracy theories" way too much. I guess I see everything as a hidden agenda. My workplace is really thick with corporate politics and that doesn't help the way I see things outside of work.

I'm not saying that everyone has it out for me, but everyone has a secret agenda...

Just sayin'.
Have you ever explored the practice/concept of Mindfulness? I got acquainted with it due to my anxiety but it has some pretty powerful/far reaching effects. Acceptance has a big place in it as well...and giving up "control" - all big issues for me.

As it relates to conspiracies against us: If we can accept that even if they do exist there's nothing we can do about it that's half the battle. The other half is staying in the moment and realizing we can control our actions now - today, and doing our best with what we have.
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Old 10-19-2016, 02:02 PM
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Thanks for the replies. At least I know what I am experiencing is somewhat normal.
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Old 10-19-2016, 02:04 PM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post

As it relates to conspiracies against us: If we can accept that even if they do exist there's nothing we can do about it that's half the battle. The other half is staying in the moment and realizing we can control our actions now - today, and doing our best with what we have.
I have to ponder that for a while. I guess I kinda always picked out this stuff almost everywhere: workplace, church, family and obviously the government. I have a gift for it!!
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Old 10-19-2016, 03:01 PM
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Everything you said sounds normal because it is. Have you read up on PAWS? Here's a helpful article -
https://digital-dharma.net/post-acut...r-immediately/

I went through pretty severe PAWS and largely don't remember the first 5 weeks. I am 8mo sober tomorrow and still need my sleep; I still take naps sometimes, though of the 30min-1hr variety, not marathon like I did in those weeks. I have lots of energy around that, though, and keep it up as long as I don't work crazy hours too many days in a row at the restaurant. I still take anxiety med as needed, and also a sleep rx most nights.

I still have something to drink in my hand, car, purse, coffee table, everywhere, all the time. ALL the time. It is habit and it is just what I do. Need to cut back on my caffeine but drink as much water as I do anything else, and there is never a worry about any kind of thirst (making me tired or hungry).

The long you keep not drinking, the better, clearer and, IME, more creative you will get. I finally got my juices back at 6mo and started my newest blog. That is an amazing outlet and this particular one (my third) is so expressive of my life in recovery even though it is not about that, per se.

Keep going!
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Old 10-19-2016, 05:41 PM
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I had all those PAWS symptoms early on.. I feel better, just tired and I'm more serious now lol I got over a completely irrational crush, which is good but now I can't stand to be around him, because I wonder why I ever felt that way.
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Old 10-19-2016, 05:52 PM
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^^Brenda- one of the things the BB cautions is against "all kinds of irrational thoughts and actions" - I have had a few "moments" or scenarios that I am grateful I didn't follow through on all the way. Makes sense that many caution against making huge life changes in early sobriety; every situation is different and what is considered "major" varies (IMO) and anything important does require our concerted attention and, perhaps, temporary "pause button" before acting.
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Old 10-19-2016, 06:24 PM
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I decided to write about my irrational crush in another thread.. I faked a migraine to get a much older married man to pay attention to me.. I was four days sober at the time.
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Old 10-19-2016, 07:56 PM
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That wonderful natural healing sleep, that alone is worth getting sober for!
When I was drinking the 3 or 4am wake up and poor quality sleep was crippling.
Congratulations on 5 weeks sober, that is wonderful.
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Old 10-19-2016, 08:19 PM
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Hey Steve,

5 weeks is huge!! Congratulations!

I'm about 14 months sober and I can relate to your points except for the artistic one, but that sure doesn't sound harmful or odd to me.

I'm no DR but I've read that it takes quite a while for our bodies to heal. I still drink a lot of water and have formed several other positive habits in sobriety.

I still sleep a fair amount 8-9.5 hrs /night, usually fluctuates, when I haven't slept a lot for a few days I catch up for a few.

I was def. edgy for a while, esp near drinking O'clock.

What's your quit program? Do you have anyone to talk to? A fellowship or a counselor or others?

I found SR (this site) helpful. Also sober blogs but in person talks with other men really helped encourage and comfort me.

CJ
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