SoberCAH

Very well said.

With my recovery, I make the rules - no one else, particularly someone who is drinking.

I don't put myself in situations in which I know that I will be around a bunch of people drinking heavily.

This was particularly the case in early sobriety.

These days, I am fairly comfortable being around alcohol, although I still respect it as something that can end my life as I now know it.

My wife and I had a pre-game football party for 100 people on Saturday, and we served beer and Margaritas (actually, our bartender served the drinks), along with soft drinks, iced tea and bottled water and plenty of good food.

I was perfectly comfortable, and no one drank too much.

When we got to the game, though, the guy next to us drinks too much and curses too much.

I cut him a good bit of slack, but I am not going to listen to his profanity all season.

We will see how his behavior plays out, but I suspect that I will handle the matter at the next game.

My fraternity is having its annual get-together at a restaurant/bar a couple of miles from our home the weekend of October 15, so my wife and I will attend, at least until people start behaving like we did 40 years ago.

After that, we will go home and go to bed.

The next night, they are all getting together at the tavern I used to go to nightly until I got sober, but I have no interest in going back there.

MissPerfumado

In my experience, the people whom I know drink too much have fallen into two stark camps: those who express respect for my giving up and sticking to it, and those who insist I should drink. I'm quite an easy-going person socially so I just tell the latter type "no" and then let them carry on.

I'm also single. I've been told by a "well-meaning" friend (after a dinner where he'd drunk lots of wine and was onto a Rusty Nail) that I would never find a guy who would appreciate a girl who was stone cold sober. Aussie blokes apparently can't deal with a sheila who doesn't drink.

Well, firstly, that's just rubbish. And secondly, if it does turn out more difficult to get into a relationship if I don't drink, that's just going to have to be the case. I'm not compromising my sobriety for anyone.

Mklove

Oona, was that my mother talking? I actually felt a little sad as we used to have a few glasses at dinner, hers well earned as she is caring full time for my dad. At 83 she is so patient. I think she knows the health part is better for her, we will make new kinds of memories.

Jack465

This is so true. I immediately thought of a coworker of mine when I read this. I can tell that my non-drinking annoys her. And, you guessed it, she probably does have a problem.

People who can take it or leave it won't care.