MsCooterBrown

" won't see the kids for a few years probably but I've got to get out of here. I realize that it was much easier for her to leave because she had a new direction in her life - her new man - Now I have a new direction and suddenly it's all i can think about - going to work harder then I've ever done and look after myself - get super fit - and no more relationships - I'm taking the red pill and going level one MGTOW
I hope I never see or speak to her ever again. I'll miss the kids but they'll grow up anyway"

This is where you lost me. What a horrid outlook on your children. I feel so sorry for them...They didn't ask for your "outlook" on life. They didn't ask to be born into this train wreck. I hope you get council. With this outlook...it sure doesn't seem you are sober.

tonesward

yes even when people are sober they can appear not to be - plenty of nutcases who don't drink

I've had to reconcile myself to a new relationship with them and that has not been easy. I was full time father now I'm an occasional visitor. But I'm thinking long term. It's better that I sober up and make something of what's left of my life so that when they are older I can help them.

I call them twice a week now, I'm introducing my 9yo son to email and I'll see them for a weekend every 3 months. If I ever go back to the UK I'll see them more.

it's not ideal but it's better than I could have hoped a while back when I posted that.

CLAS

Hi tonesward- You've been through some rough stuff. So sorry to hear about your dad. My life is brutal right now too. Every corner of it hurts and is scaring the heck out of me. But come along with me and let's not drink. It absolutely 100% will not help us to booze. Everything will hurt more. Let's sober our way out of this. I think it's my only option. Wishing you the best.