haroldhockey

Hello,
I'm new to this forum after successfully completting 4 years drink free. For some reason this milestone and gaining a promotion today has made me crave the taste so so much more than ever before. My mood is low and I fear that this will lead me back to drink. Guess I'm just seeking some new tips how you lovely guys fight the urges. Cheers. Xxx

Darwinia

How was your life these last four years? Better than when you were drinking or not?

MIRecovery

For me I treated the obsession and compulsion with AA and they have beenremoved. Still have fleeting thoughts from time to time but they are gone almost as soon as they arrive.

For me quitting drinking was only the start of reinventing myself into a different person. Recovery is about changing who we are not about trying to make our old life work without alcohol

tomsteve

welcome,herold!

could it be the anniversary and promotion have opened up some fear, which in the past ya used alcohol for?

i get a lil squirrely every year my sober date comes up- like im not going to make it.
i forget i only have today and the only way i wont make it is if i allow myself not to make it.
and i turn my attention to something more useful.

Mountainmanbob

Remember who has deceived us the most ourselves. Don't listen to any bogus thoughts.
Bob

doggonecarl

Why the low mood? You've four years sober and have just been promoted. Reasons to be happy. Are you sad because you know you shouldn't drink but want to?

They are just feelings. Try to get the celebratory spirit back and treat yourself to something special...but not drinking.

Boleo

At some point in my recovery (3 - 5 years), I decide to switch gears from an end-of-drinking program to an end-of-suffering program.

Today I attend a Buddhist based fellowship rather than a talk-therapy based fellowship.

Che

If something is upsetting you, you need to face it directly or find a healthy way of dealing with it.

One of the best reasons to stop drinking is to be able to deal with our problems sober. I'm sure that drinking will only make you more sentimental, and make you feel worse for yourself. So what's the point? Even for people with healthier drinking habits, it's not a good state to drink in. So much worse for people who have been dependent on alcohol.

Soberwolf

So you have had a bolt from the blue craving - crush it your 4 years sober I'm 3 years and all I know is your a better you sober & I don't even know you

Nice to meet you brother

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

haroldhockey

Hi all, thanks for your kind advice and words. I feel like I'm missing out on too much not drinking. I forget that stopping allowed me to buy a house, pay off all my debts, loose 7 stone, create better friendships, secure a few job promotions and a whole heap of other things.
I totally get what you mean tomsteve about the sober date or alciversary as I like to call it I'm the same at Xmas and my birthday too. Just need to fight these cravings as I would no doubt enjoy the drink should I have one now but I wouldn't like with myself tomorrow.

Windancer

Welcome to SR! I hope to see more of your posts!!!
It would be such a shame to let your AV (addictive voice) win, especially after doing so well.
Try telling yourself you are going to stay sober TODAY.
That gets me through a lot of tough times .

Loekken

I'm just hoping to do 1 year. 4 years is massive, well done.

oldsoul112249

In my experience arriving at a goal or achievement can be a letdown. The excitement, striving and anticipation is gone..sort of an empty feeling. Maybe set a new goal, something to look forward to..replace it. I also craved when something good happened. I wanted to celebrate and feel even better. A trigger I need to watch out for.

Gottalife

Same here. Haven't had to do any fighting at all in the last 36 years since I took the steps and the problem was removed.

Other than not drinking, what did you do to treat your alcoholism? I have seen quite a few folks last for long periods not drinking, but generally not happy, and then end up drunk again because they did not treat the alcoholism.

JeffreyAK

Post about it on Sober Recovery! Oh wait, you did! Seriously, just talking about a craving, online or in person or on the phone, even in a voicemail message, can really help squash it in my experience.

Berrybean

Oh, those AVS. Always trying to sneak into our heads when they think we're distracted by something and are looking the other way. Well done for spotting the little **** and posting on here.

My suggestions are similar / the same to others. ..

* make a list of the reasons you quit in the first place. Remember to include the self-hatred, shame,fear and resentments that it made you carry around. The embarrassing incident. The effects on your home and finances. The way it affected your relationships. (This should, do help you to stop romanticizing booze and what it used to do for you)

* play the tape forward in your head - what could that one or two celebration drinks kick off. It'd be a shame to get a great promotion only to screw it up by getting back on the booze.

* keep reading and posting here

* maybe see out the company of other recovered alcoholics. An AA meeting could be a good option (yes, even if you've never been before ). With your new job on the horizon and that AV rattling away it could protect your sobriety really well.

* think of a different way to celebrate your achievement with your friends. And do it.

Notimetoloose

How you going haroldhockey...congratulations on 4 years, what was your initial recovery method?
I am closing in on 3 years sobriety and every year has been faced with new and different challenges in staying sober... the last one has been the easiest by a long way and there lies part of the problem...a couple of months back the compulsion to have a drink was crazy, it lasted about 2 ish months and I had to revisit all my initial zest and reasons for not drinking...start talking back to my addictive voice and not buy into any romancing and delusions around my ability to drink normally. Just don't have that first drink!

MelindaFlowers

Wow. Four years is huge. NO way you'd want to go back to drinking.

And I don't know about you, but if I ever started drinking again I am sure I would lose my job. I never drank on the job but working hungover every day made me an apathetic and lazy employee.

I was very surprised to find in sobriety that joyous times were more of a trigger than sorrow. I've experience both in sobriety and got through both without drinking.

I'll bet you this thinking about drinking will be temporary.

You're built a whole new sober life in these four years.

MIRecovery

I quit for 6 years but never treated the alcoholism and for the most part was a miserable SOB. I reminded me of the classic joke:

What do you get when a horse thief sobers up?

You get a sober horse thief?

For me I had to recognize and work on all of the things that made me drink in the first place. I am a different person now and that person does drink or even think about it.

Dharma33

Hey, Harold-

and congrats on 4 years....that's amazing!

I'm glad you posted about feeling a little blah. This place is full of folks that want to see you succeed

I hope you check in today and let us know how you are feeling!