Truckinon

I have been praying for a miracle to happen in my life. C'mon God, the crap has been raining down non stop. I can't take it anymore.

OK, I get it. I have the miracle of sobriety. Just for today.

Cherrybreeze

I'm sorry for whatever you're going through. "When it rains, it pours" is a saying for a reason. Hang on to your sobriety, that will make it that much easier to muscle through.

Hang in there!

Mountainmanbob

the miracle of sobriety

That opens a lot of more doors for more miracles to come.
Let's face it not many miracles happen when we are drunk.
So easy to fool ourselves.
MB

zjw

careful what you wish for. I prayed i'd some how be allergic to booze or somethign or that god could just make me not an addict anymore etc.. or not liek the taste anything i begged pleaded. God in his infinate wisdome sent me panic attacks. HA HA HA gee thanks but ya know it worked lol scared the booze right out of me lol.

Also never pray for patience ...... thats a big no no....

Hang in there try and find some contentment with what you do have etc...

ScottFromWI

Sorry things aren't going your way Truckinon. Praying can be helpful, but "doing" can also help. If you wait for the world to change it might never happen....you can make positive change yourself. Is there anything specifically you need help/advice with?

Centered3

I'm sorry things aren't going well for you. :-(

There's an AA circuit speaker online, Peter M, who talks about how in sobriety, he got divorced, his ex was living in the house that he paid for, with her new boyfriend, he was jobless, couldn't find a job, people would promise him help but it never panned out, the ATM said "insufficient funds", he couldn't pay his rent, and he barely had money to fill up his gas tank.

He shared that it made him angry at God, but then realized that he had to trust God and keep the faith, especially when things were going wrong. He had to not give up on God, because God wasn't giving up on him.

He got to a point of acceptance, that this was all happening for a reason, but that if God takes him to it, He'll carry him through it and give him strength.

He took action, and went through the steps a second time with his sponsor to shine the light on new things that needed to be brought into the light. This action helped him to get back on his feet.

He also had shared that God's way of giving sometimes is by removing, and that if God wanted him to live a spiritual life of poverty, he'd do so. I think the point is, the acceptance of what was happening in the present moment, and how he continued to trust and rely on God and keep the faith through major downfalls, was what kept him going.

He eventually moved, found work where he was better appreciated, found a new relationship, and never gave up on God.

I can't believe I remember such detail from his speaker tapes, but he speaks so raw that I always remember.

I hope this helped. If you want links online where you can find his talks, let me know.

Centered3

Are you in the big book of AA? Page 158 in A Vision for has a quote that may be helpful: "God ought to be able to do anything." Then he added "He sure didn't do much for me when I was trying to fight this booze racket alone."

I think the key word there is "alone". I was taught that I don't ask God to make us sober, or to stop the bad stuff, or to give me a miracle. We meet Him half-way. We show up and do what we need to do, and then He'll guide us. We pray for guidance from God. We hear him in the silence; He speaks to our heart. We ask Him to direct our thinking and actions. We ask Him what our next step should be.

That's what the big book means when it says we don't pray for our own selfish ends. It helped me a lot to finally understand this. I hope I'm explaining it okay. God wants to have a relationship with all of His children. He is sad when we're in pain. He's not punishing us. He gave man free will. He won't approach us; we have to invite Him into our lives. And we take action based up on "6th sense" which is what we develop from building a God Consciousness.

Truckinon

Sounds good Centered, links to those talks would be appreciated.

Truckinon

Yeah, I go through that "God is punishing me" stuff. That He is teaching me a lesson, showing me the consequences of my actions, lack of action, and sin. Deep down I know that's not true. It's just one thing on top of another lately and it kicks up my depression, anxiety and fear.

My sponsor hit me with a good one the other day that stopped me in my tracks. He said:

"God is the answer. Now what's your question."

MIRecovery

Yup things can be hard in the last 2 years

I watched my daughter die a slow and agonizing death.

I had to come to grips with the fact my daughter was dead

I was fired from a job

The best dog I have ever owned died

I was offered a job only to have it withdrawn at the last second..

What keeps me going are all of the things I do have. Even though my life has been hard beyond anything I could imagine my life is good. I have, sobriety, health, friends, family, a roof over my head and a full belly, my God takes care of me in ways I never would have expected.

I have accepted hardship as a pathway to peace. Nothing is forever and I look forward to brighter days

zjw

once in a while i go through a period where i'm getting hit in every dang direction and then even knocked down and kicked in the teeth and i still gotta get up and keep moving forward. It stinks but what the heck other direction is there to go in?

Luckily however this stuff is transient and the bad times come and go along with the good times so we dont have to get stuck in any one place.

and then there is always rocky

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_Vg4uyYwEk

Soberwolf

Be the miracle I see them all the time thier beautiful

sugarbear1

Sometimes I seek the miracle so hard that I miss the lesson....maybe the focus is on the now.....being present, being useful to others, maybe it's around the corner.....

Centered3

Hi Truckinon, just saw this now. I'll send some over private message. :-)

tomsteve

yup, that's good one for sure!
something to remember:
God gave us brains to use. sittin in the garage all day wont make me a car.

something ya said up a ways:
"I have been praying for a miracle to happen in my life. C'mon God, the crap has been raining down non stop. I can't take it anymore."

welp, IMO, he has had a miracle happen, but not what you want- He helped ya get sober and gave you THE program and a sponsor to help guide you through the steps.
EVERYTHING you've described in this thread and your other one are EXACTLY what the big book promises will happen by living on self will and living YOUR program.

truckinon, seriously, I hope ya decide to throw YOUR program into the trash( along with your arse kikin machine), get with your sponsor and the big book, and start back at step 1.

RARELY have we seen a person fail who has THOROUGHLY followed our path.

THOROUGHLY have we seen a person fail who has RARELY followed our path.

dox

.
Check it out :

" . . . Accepping hardships as the pathway to peace . . ."

Berrybean

This is what I read this morning, and noted down because it reminded me of when I was in my darkest place in early sobriety...

"God's way of answering the Christian prayer for more patience, experience, hope and love is often to put him into the furnace of affiliation " Richard Cecil
"As sure as God puts His children in the furnace of affliction, He will be with them in it" (Charles Spurgeon )
The furnace of affliction is not a punishment. It is him working to help us.
"Iron, til it be thoroughly heated, is incapable to be wrought; So God sees good to cast some men into the furnace of affliction, and then beats them on His anvil into what frame he desires." (Anne Bradstreet).

I am at a stage now in my journey where I can remember the pain of living, and do wonder if that was the furnace of affliction, and the beating of His anvil. Whatever. I know that I could not have learned what I needed to, or experienced the gratitude for what I have now, if things had been easier for me. I do not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it. I needed to go where I did, and feel what I felt, in order to find the acceptance and willingness that I needed to get well and change my life.

I hope that your days of adversity will soon pass. Wishing you all the best for your recovery, and a safe journey to joy and serenity beyond this painful time..BB