sleepie

Ergh can we get this to go to page 5 so the screen ain't all stretched out...

Neferkamichael that is a lovely blossom but it is big enough to eat NYC. Try and check your pic for size next time?

sleepie

Thanks zjw I prefer honesty to sugar coatedness which is why I rather like Cow I suspect.

Tell ya what, everyone likes to talk about meditation around here. I was doing it regularly some years ago. First thing the lady said during the dharma talk was "meditation will not cure neurosis". Well that was good by me, I was in. Because it was real and I have not had the luxury of a life that is anything but harsh realities. So I could appreciate the lack of fairytaleness or that meditation was going to make everything rosy and happy or cure your ills which seems to be a lot of what people are after.

zjw

Yeah I find with meditation and mindfulness the reality is I need to sit with both the good things and the bad not that we like it but we need one to be able to appreciate the other. We can always count on life to be what it is.

zjw

It's like if I stomp a rock while running on one hand I'm screaming obscenities on the other hand I'm glad for that rock it stimulated my foot reminded me to watch wtf I'm running and brought right to the present moment and made me very aware etc.. The rock ends up neither good nor bad it just is.

sleepie

Well I managed a small walk under cover of night.

fantail

Sleepie, "quacking" is a way for loved ones to think of it when an actively addicted person is talking in service of their addiction. E.g. promising to change, or telling lies to hide the problem, or blaming the other person for their problem. I don't know where the duck/quacking metaphor came from specifically. But for loved ones to recognize quacking is similar to an addict needing to recognize AV. It's training ourselves not to listen when the addiction is talking, whether it's inside our head or through someone else's mouth!

sleepie

What did you do today Cow or did you already say?

trachemys

Someone else asked, i said I needed to reply here:

I'm drunk. Stoned. Good God I'm fried. There it is. I'm getting sober to go see Dad for father's day

trachemys

I just admitted that didn't I? What a ****** nightmare

trachemys

Who ****** cares

trachemys

Don't lie, you don't.

ScottFromWI

Hope you can put it down and get some help trach.

Croutie

Oh Trach, we do care! Please know that. You are one of the voices of reason here on SR that we all need and rely on.
I don't know what brought this on for you, but I do know that drinking will only make things worse. Please take care of yourself. We are here and we Really do care about you. Sending you Georgia hugs..

dwtbd

It's hard for people to reason with the booze, but I'm sure you understand people do care. We know what it's like to want the booze to 'work' while at the same time knowing it won't and then feeling like we have to go there anyway. It makes you care when you see it happen , because we've felt it.
Hope you put it down and soon, I do care and I told you along time ago to call me on any bs, rootin for ya

Leshar

Hello Trachemys,
For what it's worth, I do care, and hate to see you in such distress. Please keep posting.

Opivotal

More importantly trach, why don't you care? Why are you doing this to yourself?

You can have all the support in the world, but you're the only one who can stop.

I hope you do that soon.

Cow

Ah Turtle, you only human, buddy. ...mmm, wait, I think you need little more... ...there.

Since we confessing, I end up drink yesterday too. (Jesus God, is it something in the water?! Full moon maybe?) Only good thing I did was that I really really really want to go get more after first bottle. Sat on couch and contemplated for a long long time. Then I say no and just force self to go to bed. It not sound like much, but was pretty miraculous for me.

Hey Trach, we gonna has same sober day now!

Jesus God, now my sober day will be Father Day. I guess it kind of appropriate. I mean, he ruin my life, but now it time to take my life back from ruin. I guess I do it on his special day. I can live with that.

Sorry you guys waking up to all this bad news.

Fabela

So sad to hear about both of you. But, just like kids learning to walk, you need to get up again. Don't stay down. Keep posting, we're here for you.

dwtbd

And sorry don't see someone announcing that that have finally had enough and planting their foot(hoove,claw whatever) on the other side of the line and saying "I Quit" as bad news, it's all good
However my AV thinks quit days are sad/bad, never gonna last ect ect, but after I realized I could tell it to go hell , that No Matter What drinking was off the table of options for good, like uberverboten, the feeling changed for the better, me? still need work , but alcohol don't help that , so I don't let it hurt that effort either

trachemys

Ok, sweetie, we got same sober day now. We gotta keep it, OK? Christ, I'm crying cause i couldn't go see my Dad on Father's Day.