First Sponsee
 

A young girl from my home group (Big Book Step Study) called me and asked me to sponsor her last night and I accepted. I'm at just about a year sober and this is my first sponsee. I am excited, but also nervous. I made plans to meet with her on Friday for coffee....to get to know each other. I had to make a list of what to say to her/ask of her so I don't go all stupid and talk about the weather. It's exciting but also nerve racking to think that someone has placed their trust in me to guide them through this process. I had a long talk with my sponsor about sponsorship and how to go about it. I also saved my notebook from steps 1-3 (all my notes, writings, and assignments) so that I can refer to that when I give her work to complete.

I've just been hired to save someone's life. I must be doing something right for her to ask me, but I also cannot get cocky and rest on my laurels!

I am praying and asking God to guide my head and my heart so that I can be of maximum usefulness to this young woman in her journey to wellness.

Happy Friday all!

That must be really exciting! If I can just suggest: Don't pressure yourself too much. Really I think the best sponsors are the ones that act as guides through the process, letting the book really be the ultimate source. I have had a few different sponsors, all very different. But I have found that women tend to take on too big a role at first...mother, counselor, bestie. IMO its simply a guidance role....not something so big as having to 'save' another's life.

Not trying to be a Debbie downer I just wanted to throw that out there.

sounds pretty cool. I wouldnt get too too worried once you 2 get going I'd imagine it will just flow and work out well.

Congratulations, that's quite an honor and also a pretty good indicator that you are doing well. I'm sure you'll do well, enjoy the new role!

Well done Bunny,she wants what you have.

You have worked through the steps with a sponsor,I am sure you will be fine.

Wishing you well.

Is this a new sponsor you have or the other one?

You'll do a great job. You're smart, kind, empathetic, and inspiring.

Good for you, Bunny! I'm almost 13 months sober now. I haven't been asked to sponsor anyone yet - not even sure if I'm ready for that - but I have been asked to speak at 2 upcoming meetings. I suffer some pretty bad social anxiety and said I would never be able to do that, but now I find myself committed to doing it anyway. I'm confident we'll both do just fine. :)

good on ya!
no need to be nervous, which imo is fear. possibly fear of failure? maybe fear of saying something wrong?

anyways, no matter what, as long as you stay sober you will do great.

remember,too,we carry the message and not the alcoholic.

Be cautious about saving someone's life. If her life is saved it will be your higher powers doing if she doesn't make it the same is true. We carry the message not the alcoholic.

All we have is our story, experience , strength and hope. For someone who wants it this will be more than enough but unfortunately many refuse to listen

I truly believe God will guide you and bless you on this new journey

AAWS has a great pamphlet called 'Questions and Answers on Sponsorship'. If you haven't read it, you can online at:


http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-15_Q&AonSpon.pdf

It's Friday in Boston :)

Judging you solely on your writings and interaction here on SR, I'm sure you will be a great sponsor Bunny. You appear to be bright, level headed, caring and sensible, and that's what I would look for in a sponsor if I were using the 12-Steps.

Oh God. It's Wednesday! Hahaha. Total brain fart! <3

Yeah, I figured it was just a matter of brain cell misfires ;)

Save their life !?? We are beyond human aid. We may share how we stayed sober nothing more. The rest is up to a higher power. If I start thinking I can save em then I think if I fail that might kill em. That's my ego talking and THAT may kill me.

Good for you on carrying the message!

That's great news. :)

I agree with everybody else, you must be working a program that's attractive. Good for you.

I too am in a similar situation. I've been asked to take someone through the steps. It's the first time I've been asked. I was a little nervous at first, but I considered the responsibility pledge and I've since settle down.

It's not all on me, nor should it be. That's the beauty of AA. It's a collective hand that reaches out to help the next alcoholic. I'm simply one of many who carries the message. And I like the idea someone wrote about being a guide. In the end, that's all any of us can be.

I hope you find inspiration for life and immunity from picking up.

What frickaflip said. :-)

My "sponsor" acted much more like a "guide". The thought was to teach me to depend on God, not on other people, for my sobriety. I fought it the whole way but now on the other side I am so grateful for that experience.

My guide always invited God before having conversations with me, to let God work through her, so to speak, as she sponsored me.

I wouldn't want sponsees to become dependent on me. I'm not God.

I'd hope I would remember my role for each and every sponsee...both what it is, and what it is not.

Yup what Fly said. :-) Our role as sponsor is to guide them to God, and guide them through the steps, which ultimately saves their life.

Bunny you are going to be a fantastic sponsor. I can see why you were asked. :-)

Nice, Bunny. My prayer is, "God, please help me rely on You and not on myself."

We really come to care about people around here. This often happens when we see ourselves in them.
I just follow the instructs in step 12 and ask questions about what their experience is with AA or 12-step fellowship, where they're from, what they like to do. Then I talk about how I sponsor. It's nice to lay ground rules so everyone knows what to expect. Then j ask them how that feels to them.

Let God guide your instincts and you'll do great every time.