At what stage of alcoholism does moderation become impossible?
 

There are many stories of people who were heavy drinkers in their younger years but learned to drink moderately later in life. Their drinking habits may have looked like alcoholism, but today they can have two drinks with dinner and stop with that. Their tolerance has also returned to normal after being much higher when they were drinking heavier. For them, it's safe to say they did not cross the point of no return.

The stages I am going by are as follows

Stage One: Pre-alcoholic (binge drinking, increasing tolerance)
Stage Two: Early alcoholic (blackouts, anxiety if alcohol not available, further increase in tolerance)
Stage Three: Middle alcoholic (Alcoholism becomes more obvious, job performance suffers, alcohol is brought into inappropriate situations where it otherwise wouldn't be)
Stage Four: Late alcoholic (Drinking becomes an all-day affair, end of job/relationships, health problems set in)

At one point on that timeline do you think moderation is no longer possible? I would say anybody who has reached stage three or four has no choice but to never touch another drop, but what about stages one and two?

I was somewhere between stage 1 and 2 and I am not going to try moderation at all. I don't believe I can do it.

I honestly think I never had it in me to moderate my drinking or drug taking.

D

I think the question is too open to interpretation and circumstance. Someone may have gone to stage 0 to stage 4 overnight because of the loss of a loved one, they may stay that way for 6 months then find a way to return to stage 0 again.
I believe I was destined for stage 4 from the second I hit stage 1, in other words I have it in me to be that level of alcoholic whatever stage I am in my life regardless of how hard I try to moderate. I want to be able to moderate and I tried and failed for 10 years. The day I admitted that I can't and never will be able to moderate was the day I became free,

No moderation here. I drank to get drunk.

I never drank "normally" from the get go.

I don't think moderation would have worked for me at any stage. Even when I was in the early stages and only drinking once a week I'd still get cravings. I was always going to reach those later stages while I was drinking at all.

I have never been able to moderate, maybe in my teens but I don't honestly remember, by 1981 I was going flat out although somehow managed to get through University and have a great career which was lost to booze.

I don't think it matters what "stage" you're at. When moderation doesn't work it doesn't work. For me it never did. I think you're looking for some rational to talk yourself into thinking you don't have a problem with alcohol.

PS, stage one is not normal or moderate drinking.

Moderation is not possible at "any" stage of alcoholism. Nor is it possible for some folks that have never had a drink. (In my opinion/experience). While the allergy analogy is not "scientifically" correct, there is a similar response for some people. A person so pre-disposed can no more drink moderately on a consistent basis. On the other hand there are "heavy drinkers" that drink so as a choice. They may become somewhat physically addicted and could possibly return to moderate drinking (again in my opinion). The term alcoholism is so broad that in includes folks that have no control for different reasons and there are different outcomes for each depending on whether they stay sober or keep drinking. I do believe though you can turn a cucumber into a pickle, but you can't go back. :)

I don't think it matters, really. Moderation is the dream of every alcoholic. But like others, I drank to get drunk, so moderation never worked for me.

I thought moderation was possible but it was really my own inability to accept that my body processes alcohol differently from those who can drink "normally". Their bodies make them stop, so they don't have to plan to moderate.

After doing a lot of research and discussing with medical professionals, I have concluded that if I need to conciously moderate then at no point (i.e. phase 1) will I always be able to.

Hope that makes some sense.

I'm not sure I agree with those stages, actually...if I went by those descriptions, I made it past stage one on only maybe three occasions.

But alcohol was affecting my sleep, my health, my relationships, my emotional state, my weight, my memory, etc. etc. I am far better off without it.

I wasted too many years looking for the loophole where I didn't have to quit entirely. If I went by this staging system, I'd still be drinking.

Unlike many other alcoholics I've encountered, I did not drink alcoholically from the beginning. For about the first 6 years, I was perfectly content with 2 or 3 beers and only on a weekend here and there. When I was without it, I didn't miss it. If I ever went over what I considered my limit - up to a mere 4 beers over the course of the night - I felt miserable. It wasn't fun anymore.

In my early 20's, though, I started drinking alone. It began with a 6-pack over the weekend, then the weekends started getting longer. By my mid-20's, I was drinking alone pretty much everyday. That became the trend for the next 25 years.

It's very difficult to say whether or not I would have remained a moderate drinker if I had not began drinking alone. I think the potential for becoming an alcoholic was already in me, increasing the likelihood that it would eventually get out of control no matter what. That fine line between a "heavy drinker" and an alcoholic is difficult, if not impossible, to define. It's like playing Russian Roulette trying to determine which one you are.

why? what stage do you think you're at?

my reply has been said a couple times

For me, there was no such thing as moderation. I drank as much as I needed to get away from everyone, every situation - everything. That is my experience, though.

The Term Alcoholism relates to those that are Alcoholics .

Alcoholics cannot or will not be able to moderate ever .

Regards Stevie recovered 12 03 2006 .

from my point of view you either are or you are not. I could never moderate at any stage. sure it progressivly got worse but i was never able to moderate.

if there is someone who say drank heavily in college and later in life is a moderate "normal" drinker i'd say they where never an alcoholic to begin with.

My wife for example could and probably still can out drink me with vodka. But i'm the alcoholic she barely ever drinks. and when she does shes not compelled to binge each and every time she can take it or leave it.

That was me in my mid-20's through around 40. I drank a lot in college and built up a tolerance, but it was weekend binge drinking only, and once I left that environment I was a light occasional drinker with much lower tolerance for years. Over those years my drinking did slowly escalate to weekend binges again, but I was past 40 before it became an addictive thing.

I don't buy into the stages either. ;) We humans like to create divisions and boxes for people and things, but they can lead us astray when we're really looking at a smooth continuum. If drinking is a problem for you, stop and it will stop being a problem, and meanwhile you will enjoy life on it's own terms. :)