zjw

i've noticed a few times yes actually full on noticed. that these little stories i've concocted in my head had me feeling very very real emotions as if the stories where indeed actually true and unfolding. The worst of it is since its something I dream up in my head I can also get the joy of reliving it 8920329132189321 times over. One day it dawned on me like WTF FOR! why do i want to live otu some hypothetical situation a zillion times that has not and may not ever happen? when I could instead be living out the present moment and enjoying myself.

But yeah my mind will just scoop me up and next ya know hours have gone by and i went on a dang journey through my imagination ::facepalm::

Just last night I got in bed. and the mind began its mental assult of your no good your wifes gonna leave you on and on and on and on. I was like oh come on I just want to go to sleep!! but there my mind went mentally abusing the friggen heck out of me. I laid there thinking cant i maybe go to sleep while my mind continues on with its nonsense? Like ok fine wanna absue me knock yourself out but i'm going to sleep!

I guess i've managed to seperate myself from my mind more often then not this really helps me escape the nonsense more often then not. I try not to identify with with my mind. My mind and its thoughts are not me I"m not that.

Gottalife

Hey Bunny, there are promises with most of the steps, the really big ones with steps 2,3,5,9 and 10. They are already happening for you. Fear of economic insecurity does leave. That was my experience.

Your comment about reading 5th just prompted me to suggest that you study very closely pages 72-75 (Into Action) the directions for step 5. It is in a different chapter to step 4 for a good reason. There is a lot more to it than just reading step 4 to someone. The promises on page 75 make it very worthwhile to take care with this step.

God bless

amyrose

zjw - glad I am in such good company! I did start to notice I would only come up with depressing or downer scenarios - never went through my best vacation plans for hours on end, but did the deaths of all family members one by one, over and over for years. I was even right on a few in the end. Would sometimes start crying like it had really happened. Now I have the clarity to recognize what I am doing and try to quiet the noise.

FormerWineGirl

Hi Bunny, I used to have terrible anxiety and worry about everything. Time and age helped, but prayer and spirituality was (and is) the key for me. It is such a liberating feeling to finally realize that it is pointless to worry and stress over things that you have no control over. I found my peace, and I pray you find yours, too.

sugarbear1

There are many more promises than those for the 9th step! We also need to learn to live sober, which entails a whole lot more than we bargained for! Keep moving forward and talk with someone who has less time than you....be useful to others....and get past steps 5, 6, 7!

advbike

It's an overactive ego. I have the same problem, and it's the main reason I drank - to deal with all the anxiety and insecure feelings. The ego is always complaining, criticizing, wanting, telling us we're going to fail, creating fear and anxiety, etc. Regrets about the past and fear about the future.. but where we actually need to be is in the NOW.. the present moment..

Practicing yoga or mindfulness really helps, but I strongly recommend you read A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle, or Awareness, by Anthony DeMello. Both books helped me to understand my overactive ego, the negative thoughts, as well as the constant mind chatter.. and how damaging it is. Then you can find ways to turn it off and live more in the present, where you're actually a capable, loving, responsible and successful person.

Vandermast

me too my friend me too...........

van

Gottalife

I was just thinking that fear of economic insecurity left me, and some of the reason it left was through experience. At six weeks sober I got fired. Bad. Another door opened and I got a much better job. Good. I wanted to be a cab driver at one time (not for any noble motive, just because I liked driving cars), the police would not allow it. That door closed. Bad. I ended up with an amazing career, a job I liked so much I would have done it for half the pay. Good. It seems whatever pland I made for myself, God had something better in mind. It has always worked out better than I would have expected. Even doing what I am doing now, my heavenly employer always seems to send me what I need in the economic sense, either money or opportunity. This has become not so much a matter of blind faith, but faith based in experience. It just works.

Talkinandwalkin

I have an awesome cure for anxiety, high blood pressure etc that I have proven works. When I was in early recovery I had horrible anxiety and high blood pressure due to years of abuse. I read a medical article about how exercise is proven to reduce both. However, a certain exercise vigorously practiced between adults. Wink.Wink. Will lower both dramatically. I tried it and measured my blood pressure before and after and it was amazing how well it worked. Seriously no joke when used as part of an exercise program it effectively reduced my anxiety big time. Also my love walked around the house with a smile. Which is nice . Even if it doesn't work it still works like a day fishing.

IfYouCanDream

Thanks for starting this thread.
I can totally relate and it's a relief to know I'm not the only one.