cactus8

I've been drinking heavy for about 7 years, with the use of cocaine as well. I would have to say boredom was my major trigger with lack of goals and responsibilities; working from home and being my own boss.

Reason I needed to stop is the anxiety the next day and not being able to be around people without panic setting in. I had to be near an exit, inside my own vehicle or very close to my home to feel safe. If I didn't have control of being able to escape (ex, lineups), for no reason I'd feel panic.

I've cut down massively(once or twice a month with no use of cocaine), but I was only able to pull it off by moving to Asia, but now I'm facing daily Anxiety or maybe depression.

The mornings I feel like my senses are heightened and I dred simple things, like going for breakfast or just walking around the busy streets. It feels like everything is too much to handle.

I want to do physical activities like working out, but I fear I'll have anxiety in the process. This is preventing me from doing many things and I'm not sure when I'll feel normal again.

They say to replace drinking with activities but now I'm scared of activities, because of anxiety :X

least

Welcome to the family. When you stop drinking, your brain goes into hyper drive. It's been depressed so much by drinking that it goes crazy when you stop. Anxiety during withdrawal used to send me back to the bottle.

I had to tough it out and just not drink. The anxiety gets better with time.

Gottalife

I am in Asia at the moment. If I can be of any help, just P.M. me.

Before I recovered I tried the geographical cure a few times. I only made one mistake, taking me with me. The problem was always the same. When I wasn't drinking I was miserable, anxious, depressed. Pop down to the local bar and it wasn't long beofre I had a few drinking buddies and felt ok again, until the booze took over and I became miserable, anxious and depressed, and often arrested.

Couldn't live with it, couldn't live without it. Eventually went to AA and joined the program. That gave me sobriety that was way better than past experience had lead me to believe it could be. No more miserable, anxious and depressed for me

TopGun1

Changing my surroundings helped me a lot also for a while, and also is what caused it to flare up again. When my usual friends moved farther away, it made it so that I did not want to drive that far to see them anymore when they would all get together to drink, and honestly, also made me realize that I was getting too old for that behavior away. I started getting sick of just drinking with them at a friends house, going to bars, waking up on a couch hung over, and then being in bed all day the next day.

The problem reared up again when a friend that is a big drinker moved close to me again, and always was bored or wanting to hang out. Boredom really is a huge trigger for me and when you are there alone, bored and anxious, it is not a good combo, especially when you know an easy way to occupy yourself and to make the anxiety subside

Anna

I also made a geographical move at the outset of my recovery and it did help me. But, I was also lucky enough to get involved in something I loved in the new city which meant meeting wonderful (sober) people and feeling good about what I was doing.

I think that your anxiety may improve as your recovery continues. You might want to learn some simple breathing techniques that can help you with the anxious feelings.

zjw

moving helped me put down everything but booze. about 10 years ago. I however too my drinking to a whole new level tho.

I also faced massive anxiety and panic and thats why i had to quit. after i got sober i still had it and depression etc..

excercise for me has been a godsend it is not however a cure. In my case I dont think anything is a cure. I just know that I have to wake up each day make certain choices excercise and keep things simple and I manage ok. I had to figure out how to get my life manageable and balanced out and build up a toolbox of things i can do to keep anxiety and depression at bay etc..

I think for me excercise has been the absolute best thing to fight my anxiety. do i still have anxiety during oh yeah sometimes. I run and if i'm running to fast i start to panic what if i fall? or if my heart flutters what if i'm dieing? or compettition alone can make me anxious so I dont race etc.. It might sound stupid. But then after all is said and done i'm cool as a cucumber for the remainder of the day usually. The following day i do it all over again.

ScottFromWI

Welcome cactus. I suffer from anxiety too, and just like you my anxiety became much more pronounced in the last years of my drinking. Quitting drinking definitely helped, but I have personally had to accept that anxiety is a separate, distinct issue that I need to treat appropriately. I have used therapy, meditation and mindfulness as the main tools and they have been quite helpful.

2muchpain

Anxiety was, and at times, still is a major problem for me. But my drinking just added to this problem. As least said, I just had to tough it out for a while and hold on until the anxiety lessened. Toughing it out is not easy, but it had to be done. I usually exercise a lot, but there was no way I could walk into a gym with the anxiety I was dealing with. Going food shopping was impossible. Just couldn't be around people. After a few weeks, I was able to do short workouts, etc. but even that was hard, but it helped reduce my anxiety. Really had to be determined. Nowadays, my anxiety is more manageble and can now deal with it with normal coping skills. But the only way to get there was to completely stop drinking. I know what's waiting for me if I drink again. As many have said, come up with a plan and stick with it, no matter what. You can do it. John

Soberwolf

Welcome Cactus

freshstart57

Anxiety and depression are two very common mental health disorders that can be caused by alcohol. I thought I couldn't stop drinking because of all my worry and sadness, but finally I quit anyway. The anxiety and depression cleared up in a short while. Part of the reason I got better was because I had achieved this big thing, kicking the booze. Now there is a shot in the arm for you. The other big thing is that I was no longer dealing with the shame and guilt and anger and worry that comes with addiction.

I learned that depression was sadness and regret about the past, and anxiety was worry about the future. So I focussed on NOW. When I got sad or anxious, I learned how to focus my attention instead on this moment, and what my senses were telling me. Breathing and watching myself breathe was a good start. Some call this meditation.

When you quit drinking, and you will, you will wonder why you waited so long. You can do this, Cactus. Make a plan that will make it easier for you, write it out. It might say, take a walk every day. Eat stuff your body needs. Drink water every hour. Clean up and sort stuff. See a movie on Tuesdays. Join a gym. Go to church. Add one thing every day or every other day. I dunno what would make sense for you, but you can figger that out for yourself.

It takes effort to get out of this, but you can. I know you can, Cactus. Are you ready? Let's do this thing!

advbike

Not sure where you are in Asia, but I understand. I moved to SE Asia after a year sober, to the Philippines. My anxiety definitely went up just because of the crowded city I was in, and the major irritants.. traffic congestion, pollution, noise, dysfunctional people, etc. I swam, and found a place to bike that was not too bad, and the exercise really helped.

I finally had to get out of there after 18 months, and I moved to a smaller and more peaceful island, where the stress and anxiety dropped off significantly. Location is very important for us, to reduce stress and get quality sleep. I also started going to a great expat AA meeting and working the steps, which also helps.

cactus8

Thanks for all the insight

I haven't quit completely, as I had a drink on the 14th and also Janary 27th, but it's better than 5 times a week.

The anxiety is a constant fight with myself and I have seen many congnitive therapists, done breathing techniques and you name it, but it hasn't helped too much.

I feel like I have this hate, or denial; like a piece of my life has been taken away from me. All my friends, older & younger can still drink, do activities, wake up without anxiety and take on the day. I miss that. I never did anything stupid/crazy or things I regretted when I drank; I would remember my nights and end up home safely. I quit(cut down) because I was sick of making excuses every day after because my anxiety, and miss out on life.

I guess this is just a rant now, but I guess my body is getting used to this heightened sense of the world.

advbike - I've been to Philippines a couple times and I'm currently in Vietnam on a peaceful coastal city (Da Nang); most capital cities are too busy for me (BKK, HCMC, Manilla) etc and I get iinflueced in partying and the traffic kills me.

zjw

Life's not fair it just isn't. I had all those same feelings. But you know all those same people have there own sets of unfair problems. I figured if I wanted to be healthy I couldn't drink I had to eat right I had to exercise that's just how it happens to work for me it's just how it is. I know the types eat whatever they want drink remain thin and seemingly happy all of which have problems I don't have too tho. We all have to accept our lot in life. I kept searching for some reason for this like how come I can't drink etc... Because I'm an alcoholic didn't seem like a good enough answer I wanted a better answer ya know one that would let me drink and not have to accept thing for how they are there wasn't one things just are the way that they are

SoberCAH

I grew up in Memphis in West Tn and did some fairly creditable drinking and drug use in high school.

But I started drinking in earnest when I moved to Knoxville, Tn in September, 1975.

That is when and where I truly started drinking alcoholically.

13 years to the month, and I even believe week, later I walked into a treatment center right outside Knoxville and I haven't had a drink since.

I live in Knoxville most of the time, but in the Memphis area a good bit of the month as well.

I didn't move, and I got sober where my drinking truly got going.

But Knoxville is a very easy place to live and work.

It has immense natural beauty and is a medium-sized city.

People here talk like I do.

I fit into the culture (you know, heavy on the camo, Bass Pro Shop and NASCAR scene), so I always feel at home.

Where I live is a very big deal to me, so I am sympathetic in doing what one can to get where that needs to be.

For anyone who isn't quite home, I wish you the best in getting there.

It makes a difference to me.