FormerWineGirl

Had a strange thing happen while we were visiting friends in Puerto Rico. I got sick with a bad cold, and decided to stay in Friday night while my husband and friends went out for an early dinner. It was very windy, and the electricity went out. It started to get dark and all I found were a few little candles and a really small flashlight. No internet access. I sat there and started to have some anxiety. There was a bottle of vodka on the counter. Although I didn't drink, I came incredibly close. At almost 18 month sober, it was the closest I have come to drinking. I kept wrestling with it in my head. Fortunately my better judgement won, but it was so close that it really scared me. It was such a bizarre string of circumstances. Your AV really does just sit and wait...

least

for not drinking. And congrats on nearly 18 months sober!

Fly N Buy

Well done on 18 months and most importantly not picking up that first drink!

Fervor

Man, who left you alone with a bottle of vodka? Geez.

Good job. Thanks for being a good example.

Ferv
fka Xcess

Fervor

No, that's not right, I don't mean left you alone with it like you're a baby or something, but I guess I mean left it sitting there knowing you're working on that. I would want my hubby to help me out and put it out of view or something.

FormerWineGirl

Fevor, there is vodka in plain sight (along with a full bar) at my house 24/7, as my husband is a daily drinker. I didn't ask him to change anything, since it was my decision to quit. I think that's why the urge in Puerto Rico took me by such suprise, as I am used to being around it all the time. The anxiety from the power outage in a relatively foreign place was unsettling and triggered the urge, I suppose.

Fervor

You're awesome.

FormerWineGirl

Thanks, but not awesome. I was just that desperate to quit.

YogaAbba

Congratulations on resisting the urge. Even recognizing that you had the urge rather than picking up reactively is a big thing: you were able to make space for your presence of mind to have its say.

As suggested to me here in this forum, I saw and found immensely helpful a presentation by Dr. Kevin McCauley on Addiction as a Disease (you can find it on YouTube). He explains clearly and precisely why it is that times of stress cause cravings and introduce the risk of relapse. I found it really helpful.

Blessings,
YA

FormerWineGirl

Thank you, YA. I will definitely look that up.

Dee74

I'm glad you made it through FWG.

The AV can be amazingly persistent, but you dealt it a mortal blow by not giving in, I reckon

D