jazpoppy

Well today I was in counceling and I found out that drinking 4+ drinks at a sitting (a night out or at home) is NOT a normal amount of alcohol to consume unless you are definately out to get plastered! I was surprised by this because I always thought that I was a lightweight if I only drank 4 or 5 drinks at the bar or at home or what not. I thought heavy drinking or binge drinking was 8 or more drinks. It opened my eyes when my own councelor said that 4 or 5 drinks is not normal or healthy social drinking. Confirms more for me that I am an alkie like my mom, but I don't have to drink the way she does to be considered an alcoholic. Some people abuse alcohol differently than others. For example I may drink 3 drinks in a row (in about an hour,that's "normal" for me), then not drink anymore for a couple hours and go ahead and have 2 or 3 more in an hour or hour and a half. Someone else that has a problem with alcohol may drink 2 beers an hour for 12 hours (all day) or someone may drink 2 glasses of wine every night of the week, but cannot stop doing that. So I am starting to wake up and smell the coffee, I am an ADDICT PERIOD. Nothing is going to change that, so I may as well start living and stop dying. I have chosen to remain abstinent one day at a time. I will thank God each night for a sober day, and ask him to help me have a sober day each morning. Sorry I rambled on for so long.

Luv

Jocelyn

MootPoint

Sounds like your eyes are open, Jocelyn. I'm glad you didn't have to go down as far as some of us.

Now what are you going to do about it?

You have lots of help. There's AA, and there's 12 Step Alernatives. Here's the URL for the alternatives....
http://www.soberrecovery.com/links/1...ernatives.html

Keep reading and posting!!

Ann

jazpoppy

Thank you Ann. I will be looking into going back to AA and working my steps as well as checking out the alternatives. I have a workbook entitled "The 12 Steps. A Way Out". Its a workbook that brings you through all 12 steps at your own pace. Thanks again.

jocelyn

MootPoint

Yer welcome

Your workbook sounds pretty cool.

Ann

jazpoppy

I am actually looking forward to start work in it. I bought the book on Amazon.com. I will let you know how its going after a few days. I plan to do something for my recovery every day.

Jocelyn

1Marty

Great words of wisdom there Jocelyn! Keep posative, open, and HONEST with yourself, and you'll do great!

boop64132

Ditto to this! Most of us are very very out of control before we finally open the eyes and heart to really see whats going on.

jazpoppy

It still takes a lot out of me to be honest with myself. I have to struggle and struggle to put a month of sober time together. Lately there has been a relapse after 20-30 days. I am hoping this time will be different. All I can do is live hour to hour right now. I am thankful for your positive feedback. I am also thankful for the councelor who confirmed my fears about myself having a drinking problem as well as a drug problem. As they say alcohol is a drug, it certainly is, and a powerful one at that!

Jocelyn

MegH33

I am always shocked by the 4-5 drink thing. I now know I purposely placed myself with people who drank more than me. For my own sick comfort. When I had 6 they had nine, when I got to nine they had 12. Then it grew--when I was drunk for 1 day, they went for two. Oh yes, I do say it is progressive and deadly. Over the years my I'll never do that list got shorter. Yikes.

Sober is better.
Learning how to live again--one day at a time

You go Jocelyn! I'd love to read your posts daily.

jazpoppy

Reading replies to my posts are an inspiration for me. I am having a hard time with my work schedule and taking care of my son (I have to work till 6pm tues and thurs and 7pm mon and wed). Its hard on me. I have a bad back (degenerated and herniated disks) and working late makes it much worse. I am going to be honest, I did drink today. I am a good writer and I could have wrote something inspirational for everyone to read, but I am also an honest person and an alcoholic/addict. I do not have a meeting schedule down since my work hours changed, but I have moved that to my #1 priority right now! Could someone please reply with some words of wisdom for this tired opiate addict/alcoholic? I want so deperately to keep it in the day, like I had mentioned before. I want to be a good mom and a good person all around. I don't feel so good right now. Thank you for listening to my rant. Sorry that this thread started out much brighter as I was working in my recover workbook each day, but didn't do it today for some reason.

Love;

Jocelyn :arg:

Tom M

Hi Jocelyn,
The only person that can answer the question about normal drinking is yourself and I think you did. If you think you have a problem with alcohol you probably do.
It took me years and years to realize I had a problem with alcohol. A lot of that wasn't my fault, it was society and the ambiguous messages that it can give.
What I mean is that I was taught years ago when I was in the service to drink in moderation. The discipline back then for alcohol related incidents was basically that you can drink as long as you do it right.
For years I tryed to get it right and I failed again and again.
If only I could have found AA back then, I believe my life would be so much better.
As far as the 4 or 5 drink theory goes, they are probably relating that to drinking and driving. If you get in your car after having 4 or 5 drinks you will be drivng under the influence of alcohol for sure.
I personally think there should be zero tolerance for drinking and driving. Otherwise you are playing russian roulette.
Don't get me wrong though, there are people that can drink socially without incident.
I'm definetly not one of them, I drank for the effect and an escape from reality.
I can't see any point in drinking 1 or 2 drinks. Thats why I no longer drink. It makes no sense at all!. I don't think there is such a thing as normal drinking. Some people may be less prone to problems than others, thats all!

MegH33

I was worried that I was taking time from my kids going to meetings. Then I realized that without meetings, there will be no time for my kids.

It isn't easy. My sponsor tells me one day at a time, and eventually the program will be a part of you, not me trying to work it into my life--it will be my life. As I think of it, what is wrong with "practicing these principles in all our affairs" I want to be an accepting loving person. I wan't to be the one people don't have a lot of **** to say about. What I don't want to be is a bore. I want to live life to the fullest. I'm still figuring out what I like and dislike. I don't want to rock climb, but I do want to hit some concerts. I don't want to run a marathon, but I would like to hit the mall without stopping at Ruby Tuesdays for 8 drinks. I look at myself and I realize that I'm Ok without the drink/drug. I can have real belly laughs (a gift from God) and make a difference. I see that people do like me without me being outrageous.

I see it work with other people, they tell me to go to any lengths to get it. I know one man who owned a prosperous restaurant. He sold it--it wasn't good for him. I know people who moved, away from the bars. I have friends I just can't see right now, they are too into the addiction. I tried to think what I could do with them without drinking, and the answer was nothing. So I got new friends. Selfish--sure. But I am going to any lengths. Thank God I don't have to look for a new job, or leave my family. Other people have, they went to any lengths to get it.

Keep going, one day at a time.
It helps me to read the promises.
You mare worth it.

Meg

Jalyn

Wow, great thread with lots of karma!!

I relate to you all and I had a similar experience about a month ago at a regular doctor visit. I told the doctor that I drank four drinks between 6-midnight at a party. She scolded me and told me how bad it was for me and if she ever drank that much she would throw up!!

I thought...thank God I did not tell her how much I drink usually!! Four drinks in six hours??? I thought that was conservative!!

I started doing research and realized I was not only drinking way too much, but all of my suspicions were true. I indeed have a problem!!

Also, Meg, good point about the kids and AA. I too have thought along those lines. It is a small amount of time away compared to all of the times I was not fully present while I was here anyway.

Tom, I certainly know what you mean about the why bother on the 1 or 2. I got to be the same way. It was just another sign for me. When I controlled my drinking I did not enjoy and to enjoy it I had to drink uncontrollably. yuck!

Jocelyn, hope you are staying sober for today and I am going to look for that workbook myself! Keep posting!! Jalyn

jazpoppy

I am liking these new avatars, that web page is really cool! Again, great to hear from everyone. I am doing well just for today. I am staying away from alcohol, just for today. I am planning to attend a BB meeting tommorrow. I really like BB meetings. The stories are real and ususally I relate to something in each one even if the alcoholic who wrote is has a totally different story than me. I hope all is well with you guys. Post again soon!

Luv

Jaz

2dayzmuse

(((Jaz)))

You got a great beat and are easy to dance to. Keep it up!!!

Talia

jazpoppy

I'll keep on keepin' on!

Jaz

Brookie

Funny how your life always looks different through somebody else's eyes. That's part of what makes that first step so difficult. Alcoholic drinking seems totally normal to the alcoholic - no problems at all.

Great post Jaz.

Chy

Way to go!

jazpoppy

Day 2 no alcohol! I just can't think ahead though. I am tired of living in the future. So I am going to live for the moment. Thanks for everyone's encouragement! Hope all is well with everyone.

Luv

Jaz :usaribbon

MegH33

******************{Jaz}}}}}}}}}}}}

It can be done, One day at a time.

Meg