SobrieTee

Hey, all.

So I just started a new job after taking some necessary time off in order to get sober. Part of my drinking problem has always been social anxiety. I just hit six months sober this week, and I was feeling great all month. Today I have an important lunch meeting, and I've been thinking about drinking all morning. "Just a few drinks" so I can calm down. I hate meetings that involve meals, because it's impossible to hide a nervous, shaky hand when you have to eat in front of people. I realize drinking isn't an option. Last time I picked up, I didn't put the bottle down for four months. Still, these thoughts are troublesome because I still don't trust myself. I guess I'm just disappointed in myself for feeling this way

Thanks for reading

fantail

Don't be disappointed in yourself. This is normal! Getting through times like this is what makes your sobriety strong. At least in my experience, the more nervous I am about dealing with something sober, the better I feel when I do. Afterwards there's this great feeling of "Wow, that was really not as hard as I thought it would be." And then the next time I start thinking that there's no way I can do XYZ sober, I'm less likely to believe it.

Good luck. It might be nerve-wracking, but you'll get through it.

SobrieTee

Thanks, fantail! I agree that these situations are never too bad. I am just bummed because I was thinking I somehow "beat" alcohol, but clearly I didn't because I have been thinking about it since 6am. Maybe this is a good reminder that I need to stay on top of my recovery

MagillaGorilla

Stay strong

doggonecarl

It's just a lunch meeting. What? An hour? Two?

What a couple hours of anxiety compared to how miserable drinking can get. Two hours compared to four months.

You've got this!

least

Congrats on six months sober! You can get thru this sober and come out stronger for it.

Steely

Hi Sobrie Tee,
Hope you got through lunch yesterday, hand tremor or not. I agree with Fantail in that each time we make it through a difficult situation without drinking it strengthens the foundations of our long term sobriety. I had a really terrible day yesterday but today I am so glad I didn't act on, or fall back on my usual default position of wipe self out. I want self back now. Six months is fantastic.

Kallistia

Yeah...it's always slightly disappointing when it starts creeping in that it really sit something that can be "beaten" - it's good that you are keeping your guard up though and getting yourself in place mentally to get through it. Good luck Tee - I believe in you

Thumpalumpacus

It's a battle that is never over.

Dropsie

How did the lunch go??

SoberinSyracuse

I respectfully disagree with others' remarks that alcohol can't be beaten. Every time you don't drink, you beat it.

Shaky hands are less noticeable (and more socially acceptable) than alcohol on your breath. Sober folks can smell booze from 10 paces away.

Sounds like you've got your head screwed on straight. Enjoy the lunch and don't worry about your hands. :-)

rinky

I just want to say how great all you guy's are... I was just commenting on my thread that this place is the best place ever to find support and I look at the new posts and see how many have reached out to help this person get through this day... How fantastic it is to know there is always some help here... some understanding and support... Way to go everyone!!!!!!!

tim68

Don't be fooled. You know if you pick it up you can't control it. It's not worth it. Find a way to burn off that anxiety. Go for a long fast paced walk if possible. You can do this! Congrats on your 6 months!

SobrieTee

Thank you so very much!! I really appreciate the support today. I needed it Lunch was okay - I was shaky at first, but I calmed down. My peers probably noticed, but ultimately I am happy (grateful! Elated!) this did not lead to a binge. I will continue to work with my therapist on my anxiety issues.

One day at a time

SobrieTee

SiS - I agree that we beat alcohol whenever we choose not to pick up, but it is difficult when it continues to consume my thoughts. Not every day, but once in a while. Thank you for your support!

You are doing great in your journey! Keep it up

Delilah1

Congratulations on six months, that is fantastic! I hope your lunch meeting went well yesterday!!

Steely

Congratulations SobrieTee. And who cares what people think, we're sober.

Dee74

At some point all of us are going to encounter stress and it won't be unusual for our minds to 'go there' the first time or two.

I always believe our recovery is measured by not what we think...but how we respond to the thoughts.

You can deal with this anxiety and this meeting sober ST...and then, next time, it will be easier...one day you'll realise you didn't think of drinking at all. Trust me

In cease you haven't seen them here are some ideas on coping with stress

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...44-stress.html

D

Soberwolf

You done great not drinking & fantastic reaching 6 months sober

Penelopepitstop

You ain't alone. I have awful memories of my first big morning meeting. A cup and saucer, teapot and milk jug, sugar and spoon, scone and knife...my god did I regret my 'yes please'. I never knew how deadly they can be for a shaky hand. They seem to make the room go quiet and zone in on you! I have noticed that some people only ever drink water and I wonder if it's for this reason. I made the situation much worse in my head I'm sure. It was just the evil drink messing with me again.