Hello hello!
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 359
Hello hello!
Just wanted to pop in for a quick hello! Didn't disappear because I fell off the wagon and I'm coming up on four months this month.
Over came two major battles - one was a near fight with my mother (voices were raised) because she was offering me a glass of wine. She insisted I "just taste it" and after a few minutes I did raise my voice and ask her why she was pushing alcohol on an alcoholic. Turned out to be sparkling grape juice...she was trying to trick my son into thinking he was drinking wine. The logic behind that escapes me entirely.
The second was this past New Year's Eve with the partner buying a bottle of wine (he drinks so rarely it's enough to call him a non-drunker) and I had a sparkling blueberry/blackberry non-alcohol cocktail (if anyone lives near an Aldi that's when I got it, it was wonderful!) and he poured enough for a taste into each of our glasses. I thought about it - the idea did cross my mind to just drink that little bit to avoid disappointing him but even thinking about it made me nervous and agitated and brought on a lot of anxiety because I knew that one swallow would be the entire bottle and probably whatever other alcohol he had in his apartment by the end of the night - poured it into his glass and washed mine - and he also said "it's just a taste" but didn't push it any further after I told him "there's no such think as just a taste to an alcoholic"
I had to take a break from here because my brain was kind of wacky...I was kind of wacky...head all over the place and didn't quite realize it - realized I was using this forum for a lot of attention seeking and validation and sharing things from my past that should remain private and so forth so gave it a break to get into a better place mentally.
How is everyone? Oldies, newbies, and those who haven't taken that step yet (go on...do it, all you have to do is start with today
. )
Over came two major battles - one was a near fight with my mother (voices were raised) because she was offering me a glass of wine. She insisted I "just taste it" and after a few minutes I did raise my voice and ask her why she was pushing alcohol on an alcoholic. Turned out to be sparkling grape juice...she was trying to trick my son into thinking he was drinking wine. The logic behind that escapes me entirely.
The second was this past New Year's Eve with the partner buying a bottle of wine (he drinks so rarely it's enough to call him a non-drunker) and I had a sparkling blueberry/blackberry non-alcohol cocktail (if anyone lives near an Aldi that's when I got it, it was wonderful!) and he poured enough for a taste into each of our glasses. I thought about it - the idea did cross my mind to just drink that little bit to avoid disappointing him but even thinking about it made me nervous and agitated and brought on a lot of anxiety because I knew that one swallow would be the entire bottle and probably whatever other alcohol he had in his apartment by the end of the night - poured it into his glass and washed mine - and he also said "it's just a taste" but didn't push it any further after I told him "there's no such think as just a taste to an alcoholic"
I had to take a break from here because my brain was kind of wacky...I was kind of wacky...head all over the place and didn't quite realize it - realized I was using this forum for a lot of attention seeking and validation and sharing things from my past that should remain private and so forth so gave it a break to get into a better place mentally.
How is everyone? Oldies, newbies, and those who haven't taken that step yet (go on...do it, all you have to do is start with today
. )
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
good job on the 4 months.
i had simlier issues with my wife tho we didnt fight or nothing. but I dunno 6 months in or something shes like why dont you go get a six pack of that honey brown you like rararara treat yourself. i'm like i cant. oh come on just go ahead no really i cant. I think it was at that point she realized the severity of it i mean she new it was bad but I guess like anyone else she thought whats the harm in it etc...
its not really an issue now but when bad things happen to us sometimes she goes off and drinks or something and I'm like I sure wish i could do that!! i'm stuck having to cope with this mess sober GRRR but it is what it is.
i had simlier issues with my wife tho we didnt fight or nothing. but I dunno 6 months in or something shes like why dont you go get a six pack of that honey brown you like rararara treat yourself. i'm like i cant. oh come on just go ahead no really i cant. I think it was at that point she realized the severity of it i mean she new it was bad but I guess like anyone else she thought whats the harm in it etc...
its not really an issue now but when bad things happen to us sometimes she goes off and drinks or something and I'm like I sure wish i could do that!! i'm stuck having to cope with this mess sober GRRR but it is what it is.
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 359
Originally Posted by zjw 
good job on the 4 months. i had simlier issues with my wife tho we didnt fight or nothing. but I dunno 6 months in or something shes like why dont you go get a six pack of that honey brown you like rararara treat yourself. i'm like i cant. oh come on just go ahead no really i cant. I think it was at that point she realized the severity of it i mean she new it was bad but I guess like anyone else she thought whats the harm in it etc... its not really an issue now but when bad things happen to us sometimes she goes off and drinks or something and I'm like I sure wish i could do that!! i'm stuck having to cope with this mess sober GRRR but it is what it is.
I've been fortunate enough to be in the right time and place to talk to people that had their own issues with alcohol - two I directed to this forum and a third has stopped drinking since she doesn't have her drinking buddy (me) anymore - the same way I did also, just quietly stopped doing it and didn't make a deal of it, and a fourth is wibbling on the fence on whether or not they have a problem so I just keep sending him off to google for "resources that are available if he decides to quit" so hopefully he's listening and Google is keeping it in his face that he will not be alone if he makes up his mind.
Most things really haven't changed, I still work for Satan - that WILL be changing within the next few weeks because working with female hitler is incredibly incredibly depressing - parents are still awesome but kind of suck in their own right - dads drinking more than ever. Starting to see signs of cirrhosis, incredibly swollen stomach, blotchy skin, a lot of redness - but I have washed my hands of that - can't make him stop so unfortunately it just seems a matter of sitting back and letting him drink himself into the grave. It is what it is.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
Most things really haven't changed, I still work for Satan - that WILL be changing within the next few weeks because working with female hitler
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 359
Originally Posted by zjw
sorry how you put it made me laugh. I'm gonna have to refer to my place of employment and boss in a simlier fashion to maybe make it laughable and more tolerable.
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