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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Meditation
Posts: 1,300
Yeah I will thanks Aussie.
I was realizing today again that my emotions are all over the place. So much is going on in my life right now - Wife, kids, house, job, business, family, and lots more. Sometimes I just dont know if I am gonna be able to pull it all off. It looks like it from the outside but from the inside it looks like a mess to me.
Im grateful for all the opportunity I have for sure and I dont want to waste it.
Ive been on the fence so long about alcohol its ridiculous really. So the thing is there really isnt much of a decision here. The tools are available its just time to use them.
I was realizing today again that my emotions are all over the place. So much is going on in my life right now - Wife, kids, house, job, business, family, and lots more. Sometimes I just dont know if I am gonna be able to pull it all off. It looks like it from the outside but from the inside it looks like a mess to me.
Im grateful for all the opportunity I have for sure and I dont want to waste it.
Ive been on the fence so long about alcohol its ridiculous really. So the thing is there really isnt much of a decision here. The tools are available its just time to use them.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 852
Originally Posted by Fallow 
Awesomw Courage!
Good to see you again.
I am enjoying this sober weekend so far. Hope you all are too.
Im not getting as much done as Id like but thats alright.
Good to see you again.
I am enjoying this sober weekend so far. Hope you all are too.
Im not getting as much done as Id like but thats alright.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Meditation
Posts: 1,300
Its monday morning and yes I feel good. Worked out yesterday so im sore but got good rest. Im determined to have sobriety stick this time. Theres no good reason to go back to a drinking lifestyle for me. I know theres lots of work ahead.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,039
Yay, Fallow!
My recollection is that most of the time, you don't suffer a lot of obvious consequences from your drinking, and you're a longtime drinker. That was my father.
If my father had admitted he had a problem while his children were young, before we'd suffered the consequences of his drinking, all our lives would have been hugely better.
I'm sure it's hard to give up something, because you know objectively it is eventually going to destroy you and your family, when it isn't destroying you right this moment. That's why I'm really impressed by your determination to do the right thing now, before irrevocable damage it done.
Stay the course! Have a great day!
My recollection is that most of the time, you don't suffer a lot of obvious consequences from your drinking, and you're a longtime drinker. That was my father.
If my father had admitted he had a problem while his children were young, before we'd suffered the consequences of his drinking, all our lives would have been hugely better.
I'm sure it's hard to give up something, because you know objectively it is eventually going to destroy you and your family, when it isn't destroying you right this moment. That's why I'm really impressed by your determination to do the right thing now, before irrevocable damage it done.
Stay the course! Have a great day!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Meditation
Posts: 1,300
Lol Dee very true.
Courage thanks so much for your post it really hits home to say the least.
I was thinking earlier about how for me its easy to do a week sober, it just seems difficult after a month or months. I think theres been this incremental admission that yes drinking really is a problem for me.
Its true I havent suffered a lot of serious consequences from drinking. Only a few and in the past few years I learned how to manage my drinking and situations so I could avoid trouble. Which is probably not a good thing and lends itself to me believing im not an alcoholic really. But I know that the term doesnt matter now.
I dont want to have my kids someday stating that my drinking had negative effects on them as they grew up. Even in a small way. And I dont want to eventually suffer the health consequences of drinking either. I dont think I can manage my way out of those and that scares me.
It really is hard to give it up for good. But I know its for the best and booze isnt doing anything good for me really.
Scott right now I am just using SR, AA speaker tapes, and prayer, and meditation. Im willing to go back to AA if necessary but I really want that time to go to my family. Ive read RR in the past. I may check out some other books Ive heard about but Im not really wanting f2f help just yet.
I would like to get a therapist at some point but mainly to help me with work and wife issues.
Im looking forward to this next sober weekend
Courage thanks so much for your post it really hits home to say the least.
I was thinking earlier about how for me its easy to do a week sober, it just seems difficult after a month or months. I think theres been this incremental admission that yes drinking really is a problem for me.
Its true I havent suffered a lot of serious consequences from drinking. Only a few and in the past few years I learned how to manage my drinking and situations so I could avoid trouble. Which is probably not a good thing and lends itself to me believing im not an alcoholic really. But I know that the term doesnt matter now.
I dont want to have my kids someday stating that my drinking had negative effects on them as they grew up. Even in a small way. And I dont want to eventually suffer the health consequences of drinking either. I dont think I can manage my way out of those and that scares me.
It really is hard to give it up for good. But I know its for the best and booze isnt doing anything good for me really.
Scott right now I am just using SR, AA speaker tapes, and prayer, and meditation. Im willing to go back to AA if necessary but I really want that time to go to my family. Ive read RR in the past. I may check out some other books Ive heard about but Im not really wanting f2f help just yet.
I would like to get a therapist at some point but mainly to help me with work and wife issues.
Im looking forward to this next sober weekend
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 1,222
hi Fallow......the way I see it is I am either drinking and alcoholic or I am sober forever in which case I don't drink and get on with it. If I ever drink I will slide into oblivion, just like every other alcoholic on the board. They are the only two choices for me. There is no in between, i.e. drinking in moderation, because both you and I know it is impossible for an alcoholic to sustain this for very long.
Like you, I can give up drinking easily enough for a week. I just see it as a challenge and I love to take on challenges. There, a week done. It gets harder for me also after a couple of months. So why is this?
I believe its because I didn't do a good enough job of building a new sober life. I lived the same old life, minus the drinking. Then after a couple of months th eAV eventually wore me down or I forgot all the horrors and it was just too easy to drink again. thistle I need to find non drinking friends, build a social life that doesn't involve drinking or pubs etc etc. This should help.
Like you, I can give up drinking easily enough for a week. I just see it as a challenge and I love to take on challenges. There, a week done. It gets harder for me also after a couple of months. So why is this?
I believe its because I didn't do a good enough job of building a new sober life. I lived the same old life, minus the drinking. Then after a couple of months th eAV eventually wore me down or I forgot all the horrors and it was just too easy to drink again. thistle I need to find non drinking friends, build a social life that doesn't involve drinking or pubs etc etc. This should help.
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