Been a very long while
 

Hello everyone! To start with it's been a very long time since I posted on here, fact I think I was still active in using when I did so. But tomorrow is my 7 months sobriety date. The best ever decision I made was to enter inpatient rehab here in Washington at sundown ranch. I credit them for doing a very very good job, for the most part saving my life. I still keep in contact with a lot of people I met in there all across the country from Oklahoma to Alaska. (6 of 7 of my group members from in there get together on skype each week, it's awesome they are all about the same age as me 21-25.) but anyways I had a little concern I wanted to ask about. After I was discharged my apartment had been cleared out, lease paid off, and I had a bedroom/bathroom set up for me here at my parents house. Which is pretty much my own apartment it's not terrible, but due to my credit score being absolutely atrocious, it's hard
To find a place of my own. I had started a new job on late May, having gotten out of sundown in early May, and I was so happy. For the first time in 5 years I had a job where I wasn't going in hungover or going through withdrawals being miserable. As I worked there I showed to others that when not drinking I am a great employee, and the reasoning for all the other jobs I had lost previously were all due to my drinking and drugging. Recently, though however after 7 months of working there, I was unfortunately let go. For a reason I still can't really comprehend but the positive I guess was it was not for my drinking. Anyways, it has been almost 3 weeks now without working, I had saved up a substantial amount to live off in case it were to happen. But since I'm 22 years old, I have noticed my stress, depression, and worries are taking over. I don't feel the need to drink or anything, it's just my social behavior has changed due to me feeling like a loser, ex. Living at home, now no job, I start school this next quarter, but that's still months away. It has just gotten to me, these thoughts that run through my mind. Due to my family and friends in the past watching me use, and seeing me struggle. But this seems to be the first time I have been struggling since being sober. Like I said I don't feel the urge to drink or anything, but my boredom concerns me, I do enjoy being outside and being with my friends, but the winter makes that hard to do, and there is no snow yet so I can't quite go up to the mountain. Against all the things I have heard and still hear in rehab, I do still smoke weed. Well, not smoke I eat the edibles, I'm prescribed for anxiety anyways, and it helps me feel more at peace with my higher power, which is nature
Since I'm not religious. I don't know I decided to get some of my feelings off my chest on how I wish I could get rid of these feelings, as I still am pretty new in recovery. I felt really good working and doing my thing there full time, but when I lost my job it definitely kind of killed my confidence boost.

Best wishes-
Brad

I have a laundry list of the things I hate about pot, but weed really sapped my motivation to do things and fed into my feeling bad about myself, so I really suggest you consider putting that to one side to see if your energy and drive returns?

Have you considered volunteering? It's a great way to use your time, get out of the house, and do something productive. Looks pretty good on a resume too.

Brad,

I'm gonna second what Dee said. When I was your age, smoking weed made me paranoid, lazy and depressed and filled me with self-doubt. I would strongly encourage you to put it down. If you are currently between gigs, smoking pot is the last thing you need to be doing.

By the way, congrats on seven months. That is fabulous!!!!

This rang a bell. When I was your age, or a bit younger, I stopped drinking for a while as a result of court ordered rehab. Untreated alcoholism "made me paranoid, lazy and depressed and filled me with self-doubt"

I still had a job right until I picked up again, still had somewhere to live, still had a couple of friends, so those external factors were not what made me drink. On the face of it, life was good. I just didn't do life well without booze.

I have known others who find it easy to stay sober as long as life is going their way. When something bad happens, however, they eventually turn to their old solution. This is symptomatic of untreated alcoholism, the underlying causes were still there.

There was something wrong with my reaction to life.

Adopt a daily exercise routine! Helps pass the time and builds confidence

Congrats on the 7 months alcohol free time Brad

Are you planning on stopping the 'edibles' I havnt heard of that before & you say its under script for anxiety

I had a friend once who smoked weed I'm not trying to scare you but his head completely went with it like changed forever it pisses me off he was a good dude & wasn't even smoking for long he was my kids brother age and yeah that sucks

What Dr would prescribe weed for anxiety ? is this that medical marijuana ?

Cannabis | FRANK

The weed could jeopardize your sobriety. ..

I am also 7 months. My main area of difficulty is occasional anxiety. What I have found Helps me is taking long walks. I talk over my problems with myself and by the time I get back home they are evaporated. I also give away some of my time volunteering as a way of saying thanks. I know it can be tough when you have put in so much effort to get sober and then be dealt another obstacle. My prayers are with you.

Congrats on how far you've come!
My anxiety has disappeared since quitting alcohol.
I'd have thought pot would cause anxiety since its known to cause paranoia which is (I thought) a form of anxiety. (I'm not second guessing an Rx just making a casual observation)
I agree with Juppe - but I think working out is the answer to almost everything :-)
Until you find another suitable job, as Dee said, volunteering would be a good time filler.

Some may make the argument that you're not truly sober if you're still using pot. After quitting booze I definitely held onto weed as an escape and found myself abusing it