Being sober's not enough
This is a good thread posing a common, legit question = is there any fun or life in sobriety!?!
When I quit they told me - you never have to drink anymore. All I heard was I never Get to drink anymore. T
Slowly as I gain more sober time small fires are lite. Years back I had put my guitar up as I only played when drunk and was very sloppy. Recently got new strings and have been playing again. I can even remember the chords now!!
As Carl posted, we feel deprived. I agree I felt that way, good observation. For me sobriety is indeed just a new baseline of consciousness. It is a starting point.
For the first time in my life I get to find out Who Are You(me) - what a gift. Many die without even the thought of trying to discover it.......wow! So very grateful for the opportunity. Reminds me of the movie Awakenings with Robert Deniro or the kid that Scrooge yells at - Hey Boy, what day is it!? Christmas! Oh, good - I didn't miss it!@
That's how I feel - I didn't miss it!
Glad you're here, friend and thanks for the great thread!
When I quit they told me - you never have to drink anymore. All I heard was I never Get to drink anymore. T
Slowly as I gain more sober time small fires are lite. Years back I had put my guitar up as I only played when drunk and was very sloppy. Recently got new strings and have been playing again. I can even remember the chords now!!
As Carl posted, we feel deprived. I agree I felt that way, good observation. For me sobriety is indeed just a new baseline of consciousness. It is a starting point.
For the first time in my life I get to find out Who Are You(me) - what a gift. Many die without even the thought of trying to discover it.......wow! So very grateful for the opportunity. Reminds me of the movie Awakenings with Robert Deniro or the kid that Scrooge yells at - Hey Boy, what day is it!? Christmas! Oh, good - I didn't miss it!@
That's how I feel - I didn't miss it!
Glad you're here, friend and thanks for the great thread!
Sam I am,
at seven months it sounds like you are still obsessing about alcohol, it is still controlling your life, regulating what you can do.
I lost that obsession through a spirtual experience. When the obsession is gone, the whole world opens up. You could go anywhere, do anything that free men can do (except drink and maybe one or two other things). That is what spiritual recovery is about.
Maybe what you have at the moment is psychological recovery, based on the premise of realistically achieveable goals, or harm reduction. You are not drinking therefore much of the physical damage to self and community has stopped. But is it good enough for you? Why settle for second best?
at seven months it sounds like you are still obsessing about alcohol, it is still controlling your life, regulating what you can do.
I lost that obsession through a spirtual experience. When the obsession is gone, the whole world opens up. You could go anywhere, do anything that free men can do (except drink and maybe one or two other things). That is what spiritual recovery is about.
Maybe what you have at the moment is psychological recovery, based on the premise of realistically achieveable goals, or harm reduction. You are not drinking therefore much of the physical damage to self and community has stopped. But is it good enough for you? Why settle for second best?
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Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 93
Sam I am,
Maybe what you have at the moment is psychological recovery, based on the premise of realistically achieveable goals, or harm reduction. You are not drinking therefore much of the physical damage to self and community has stopped. But is it good enough for you? Why settle for second best?
Maybe what you have at the moment is psychological recovery, based on the premise of realistically achieveable goals, or harm reduction. You are not drinking therefore much of the physical damage to self and community has stopped. But is it good enough for you? Why settle for second best?
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 108
You are right being sober is not enough it's important to be in recovery there's a big difference sober simply means not drunk we still act and treat people the same way still filled with fear and resentment anxiety and anticipation getting sober is a start but if we do some work on ourselves and have that second change face and get rid of what's blocking us from happiness life will not be boring we simply don't drink today we don't use today sober simply means not drunk we still act 13 people the same way still feel with fear and resentment anxiety anticipation getting servers a start but if we do some work on ourselves and have that sexy change face in get rid of what's blocking us on happiness life will not be boring we simply don't drink today we don't use today we learn how to recreate our lives only become happy and peaceful mat board not boring but we get out of recovery what we put into it just being sober that's boring have a great Thanksgiving
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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I did everything in sobriety I used to talked about but never did while drinking. Granted nothing panned out but that`s not important.
What is important is actually tired instead of just babbling about do so while drunk.
No mid-life crisis for this recovering alcoholic. Sobriety has given me a full plate.
But I do remember thinking what will I do if I`m not drinking? I never dated a woman sober. Never when to a party sober ect.
But you do learn and the fellowship can be great place to work on your social skills.
What is important is actually tired instead of just babbling about do so while drunk.
No mid-life crisis for this recovering alcoholic. Sobriety has given me a full plate.
But I do remember thinking what will I do if I`m not drinking? I never dated a woman sober. Never when to a party sober ect.
But you do learn and the fellowship can be great place to work on your social skills.
Spiritual experience for me is simply a change in my attitude and outlook on life.
"Second best" for me is just stopping drinking but continuing on with my old mindset. I was negative and pessimistic for the most part but called that "being realistic". I was angry that life didn't go the way I thought it should and people didn't behave the way I thought they should. I was bored and restless and irritable. It never made for a happy or contented sobriety.
Working the 12 Steps are what did it for me. As a result of them, that "spiritual experience" occurred; I found that the way I was seeing life began to change. I am becoming more accepting, better able to live life on life's terms without fighting everyone and everything. I'm more happy, peaceful and contented and wake up most days grateful for my sobriety. Life is quieter in some ways, but in a good way but I also find it more exciting and have fun with simple things. I'm very rarely bored anymore.
I still have the occasional crappy, restless, boring days, but they don't last all that long. Most of the time I've let my thinking go negative and resistant when I get like that. It takes some maintenance to stay in that good frame of mind.
If the 12 Steps aren't for you, I still think that finding some way to get into a better mindset and way of thinking can make a huge difference in how happy someone can be in sobriety. Changing my thinking changed my life. This is just the way that I found that worked for me.
"Second best" for me is just stopping drinking but continuing on with my old mindset. I was negative and pessimistic for the most part but called that "being realistic". I was angry that life didn't go the way I thought it should and people didn't behave the way I thought they should. I was bored and restless and irritable. It never made for a happy or contented sobriety.
Working the 12 Steps are what did it for me. As a result of them, that "spiritual experience" occurred; I found that the way I was seeing life began to change. I am becoming more accepting, better able to live life on life's terms without fighting everyone and everything. I'm more happy, peaceful and contented and wake up most days grateful for my sobriety. Life is quieter in some ways, but in a good way but I also find it more exciting and have fun with simple things. I'm very rarely bored anymore.
I still have the occasional crappy, restless, boring days, but they don't last all that long. Most of the time I've let my thinking go negative and resistant when I get like that. It takes some maintenance to stay in that good frame of mind.
If the 12 Steps aren't for you, I still think that finding some way to get into a better mindset and way of thinking can make a huge difference in how happy someone can be in sobriety. Changing my thinking changed my life. This is just the way that I found that worked for me.
This is a very valid post. "Re-learning how to do things sober that were seemingly effortless while under-the-influence" should be the title....That being said, the responses are: just do it----much like the forgetfulness of those who have been sober for a bit and can't really relate to the detox, first week etc... bc it was rather unpleasant and the mind naturally forgets as a protection.... Otherwise we would have all offed ourselves bc life really is un-bearable sometimes. Kudo's for the honesty and I'm pegged to this thread to see some "digging deep".
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Location: Perth WA
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fight or flight, cortisone, video games? Over stimulation. it all stops us from feeling the hurt of being judged less. Give it time to work it through but it's about becoming human, not content. ment. We are here for you to speak your pain and its absence.
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