First time posting
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 3
First time posting
Hi everyone,
Just thought I would make a post instead of just lurking.
Today is a whole week without drinking, never really tried to stop before but this forum has really helped during that week and Im sure it will help many to come, is seems as though I had the same thoughts as many others when thinking about stopping drinking :-
Well it appears, like many others, I may be wrong on all counts.
It all came to light a little last weekend by really pissing off my friend and maybe losing my partner (well see on that one Im seeing her today so who knows).
Im what would be called a problem drinker I suppose , I never want to stop the fun, I honestly cant remember the last time either at home or in the pub that I actually had the couple that I was meant t have. And I always thought I was a pleasant drunk, but Im not, theres a very short period (maybe a pint or two) before I stop coming out of my shell and become an ********.
And thats where it comes from , not very good socially at times so I drink, but why then drink at home alone ? This question has always been in the back of my mind but I never let myself ask it.
Well just thought Id say Hi and maybe reassure anyone else new to this lark, everything is the same , not sleeping , finding it hard to occupy my time, bit lonely because staying away from pub.
Oh and thanks, last night wasn't great, a Saturday night on my own, keep busy all day and then about 6 had a very sudden feeling of dis spear, really strange, happened so suddenly so I came on here had a read, made things a lot better.
Just thought I would make a post instead of just lurking.
Today is a whole week without drinking, never really tried to stop before but this forum has really helped during that week and Im sure it will help many to come, is seems as though I had the same thoughts as many others when thinking about stopping drinking :-
- I don't drink every night Im not an alcoholic
- A bottle or two of wine or half a bottle of whiskey on my own doesn't my make me a alcoholic.
- I get to work everyday, I cant be that bad
- Everyone I knows drink, Im jest like them
Well it appears, like many others, I may be wrong on all counts.
It all came to light a little last weekend by really pissing off my friend and maybe losing my partner (well see on that one Im seeing her today so who knows).
Im what would be called a problem drinker I suppose , I never want to stop the fun, I honestly cant remember the last time either at home or in the pub that I actually had the couple that I was meant t have. And I always thought I was a pleasant drunk, but Im not, theres a very short period (maybe a pint or two) before I stop coming out of my shell and become an ********.
And thats where it comes from , not very good socially at times so I drink, but why then drink at home alone ? This question has always been in the back of my mind but I never let myself ask it.
Well just thought Id say Hi and maybe reassure anyone else new to this lark, everything is the same , not sleeping , finding it hard to occupy my time, bit lonely because staying away from pub.
Oh and thanks, last night wasn't great, a Saturday night on my own, keep busy all day and then about 6 had a very sudden feeling of dis spear, really strange, happened so suddenly so I came on here had a read, made things a lot better.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Welcome aboard Joey 
I can absolutely assure you things can and will get better - give it a little while - you be glad you did
As you know already, you'll find a lot of good ideas, support and encouragement here
I can absolutely assure you things can and will get better - give it a little while - you be glad you did
As you know already, you'll find a lot of good ideas, support and encouragement here
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: UK, South Coast
Posts: 605
Hey Joey, u sound just like me!!! Ive been like that for about 10 years, finally realised a few months ago that im an alcoholic (problem drinker) i annot just have 1 so i have chosen to have none!!!! 1 week down too & i got caught out last wkend when my partner noticed me half pissed & found an empty bottle (hidden) great support on here!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 3
Thanks Guys, no doubt there will be tough days ahead (today could well be one of them). Looking back ive always done everything to the max, when i was younger did fair amount of drugs and was the same, but i just grew out of them.
I have to realise that if i dont like me when im drunk (paranoid next days) theres no chance anyone else will. The next step is finding a hobby or two.
Good luck Lou , stay strong , thanks again guys.
I have to realise that if i dont like me when im drunk (paranoid next days) theres no chance anyone else will. The next step is finding a hobby or two.
Good luck Lou , stay strong , thanks again guys.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,243
Welcome to Sober Recovery!
Earlier in my sobriety I had a lot of thoughts like that. It took me quite a while to understand that I was sub-conscientiously trying rationalize my alcoholism as being a normal drinker. I was quite talented at convincing myself that I was not an alcoholic!
Thank goodness I no longer have those thoughts!
Earlier in my sobriety I had a lot of thoughts like that. It took me quite a while to understand that I was sub-conscientiously trying rationalize my alcoholism as being a normal drinker. I was quite talented at convincing myself that I was not an alcoholic!
Thank goodness I no longer have those thoughts!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: south texas
Posts: 152
joeydeacan, welcome aboard!
Being sober for almost a month now , I'm still adjusting to my new way of life without drinking,
However I'm still dealing with sleepless nights and mood swings,
But is it improving a little bit better day by day !
And I'm always reminding myself " Just that one beer" would sent me back on another miserable predictable journey again!!
Cheers
Being sober for almost a month now , I'm still adjusting to my new way of life without drinking,
However I'm still dealing with sleepless nights and mood swings,
But is it improving a little bit better day by day !
And I'm always reminding myself " Just that one beer" would sent me back on another miserable predictable journey again!!
Cheers
paradox
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 665
Welcome, Joey.
Like you, I grew out most of my drug use and graduated to the drug that's legally available on any High Street.
I can still sometimes deny, to myself, that I am an alcoholic.
That's part of the illness.
But, there is no way that I could stop on my own.
Congratulations on one week!
Awesome.
And well done for posting.
We are all here to help each other.
Your first post helped me to remember what it was like.
No denial for me at the moment.
All the best.
~dox
Like you, I grew out most of my drug use and graduated to the drug that's legally available on any High Street.
I can still sometimes deny, to myself, that I am an alcoholic.
That's part of the illness.
But, there is no way that I could stop on my own.
Congratulations on one week!
Awesome.
And well done for posting.
We are all here to help each other.
Your first post helped me to remember what it was like.
No denial for me at the moment.
All the best.
~dox
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome JD.
Have you worked out a sobriety plan? It's worth doing, although it will change as you learn more about yourself and what is and isn't challenging in sobriety. It sounds like weekends could be a sticking point for example, so it's worth thinking about what plans you could put in place so that you still have something to look forward to at weekends.
Have you any family or friends (probably much neglected over the years) who don't share your enthusiasm for alcohol? If so, it might be worth making plans to catch up with those people when you're going to be at a lose end. Go for food or a film, or bowling or something. I found I had to start thinking out of the box a bit so that I didn't isolate. Thankfully I've made some good sober mates in AA (I was pleased to find that there're plenty of younger women (and blokes) there who still like to get out and socialise)so I get to go out with them.
Good luck in finding a good solid sober pathway that suits you.
Have you worked out a sobriety plan? It's worth doing, although it will change as you learn more about yourself and what is and isn't challenging in sobriety. It sounds like weekends could be a sticking point for example, so it's worth thinking about what plans you could put in place so that you still have something to look forward to at weekends.
Have you any family or friends (probably much neglected over the years) who don't share your enthusiasm for alcohol? If so, it might be worth making plans to catch up with those people when you're going to be at a lose end. Go for food or a film, or bowling or something. I found I had to start thinking out of the box a bit so that I didn't isolate. Thankfully I've made some good sober mates in AA (I was pleased to find that there're plenty of younger women (and blokes) there who still like to get out and socialise)so I get to go out with them.
Good luck in finding a good solid sober pathway that suits you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 3
Some very very good points there from all, espicially about being solitary, cant go down the pub means a lot of housework at the moment tbh lol, well it needed doing.
Making a plan sounds good im going sea fishing at the weekend so that saturday done and out for a meal which will be different , no glass of red !
Had anyone put on weight while stopping ? I seem to be eating more espicially at night due to a bit of broken sleep, i dont want to get huge. Just need to motivate myself a bit altho im naturally a bit lazy, i think thats why drinking being a hobby was so easy , no much hard work needed.
Making a plan sounds good im going sea fishing at the weekend so that saturday done and out for a meal which will be different , no glass of red !
Had anyone put on weight while stopping ? I seem to be eating more espicially at night due to a bit of broken sleep, i dont want to get huge. Just need to motivate myself a bit altho im naturally a bit lazy, i think thats why drinking being a hobby was so easy , no much hard work needed.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Lots of people get sugar cravings when they stop - I was told to eat loads and avoid getting hungry. Trouble is, junk and sugar tends to make my moods a little erratic so tried to eat little and often and eat healthy stuff that was still satisfying rather than junk. Mood swings and erratic emotion changes don't make for comfortable sobriety any more than hunger does! Lol.
House work is all well and good, and one of the up sides to sobriety is that for the first time in my adult life my home is clean and organised. It looks nice and smells nice. There is food in the fridge - ingredients and stuff, actually IN DATE!!
Try to make sure you get some fun stuff in there as well - the fishing sounds a good option
House work is all well and good, and one of the up sides to sobriety is that for the first time in my adult life my home is clean and organised. It looks nice and smells nice. There is food in the fridge - ingredients and stuff, actually IN DATE!!
Try to make sure you get some fun stuff in there as well - the fishing sounds a good option
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 861
Welcome Joey! I'm glad you posted.
I did gain about five pounds when I got sober once (& other times I got sober without gaining weight). I ate lots of pasta at first. I would assume your eating will stabilize soon. And you can always lose the weight later, if you don't lose it spontaneously.
For me, it helped a lot to make plans ahead of time for how to stay sober when triggered (like the sea fishing trip).
Good luck! Keep posting!
I did gain about five pounds when I got sober once (& other times I got sober without gaining weight). I ate lots of pasta at first. I would assume your eating will stabilize soon. And you can always lose the weight later, if you don't lose it spontaneously.
For me, it helped a lot to make plans ahead of time for how to stay sober when triggered (like the sea fishing trip).
Good luck! Keep posting!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
