Debbie329

Was a speaker meeting at a rehab......it was a full house. I have no complaints it was a good meeting. I'm going to the next step meeting next week which is step 3......I gave my life over to God...........something like that. If I don't believe in God......who am I going to turn my life over to? I can't wait to hear what people at that meet will explain themselves. But , im going and I'm keeping my mouth shut.....any ideas on how to view step three wo God in the picture?

ScottFromWI

You could just go and listen.

breath

I went to meetings and did just that, listened; most everyone there had what I wanted. It worked, I've been sober 4.5 years. I don't know who or what my Higher Power is, I just know I have one, that seems to work for me.

I keep going back to meetings becuse it works.

advbike

Good for you, for going anyway!

Higher power is a more inclusive term than God anyway. So many people get hung up on the God thing. This dates back to the origins of AA.. hence their recommendation to make it anything.. the collective universe, nature, etc. I'm a big nature lover so I kind of went with that at first.. but now I see that my higher power is mainly the "absence of ego".. when I can achieve it.. lol.

oak

Glad the second meeting went better. You are right to search around for meetings that feel right to you.

I struggled a lot with the third step. I don't believe in god or any hp. Instead of a higher power, I think of a bigger power, like the connection between all things or the earth/universe. 'Higher' suggests a hierarchy which goes against my sense of spirituality.

So for me, the third step is about remembering that I am connected to the universe, part of something bigger. I also see the earth as sacred, and my life is part of the earth. I also wonder if we all have a personal mission or universal purpose for being here.

It helped me to rewrite the first three steps for myself. I just wrote what I liked about each step, because there are underlying ideas from each step that I like and that I want to emphasize in my life.

Personally, I tend to avoid step meetings. I love that you are curious about what they will say at the third step meeting. Good for you for going and being curious!

Gottalife

Debbie, that is a really good question. I am sure that many if not most alcoholics run into this problem. I came in agnostic I guess, but I had no idea about God, no feeling for it, no experience of it. I just had a certain anitpathy which I cannot explain.

My sugesstion is first to back track. You know about step one, it identifies the problem. The next step identifies possible solutions.

You might come to believe that a power greater than yourself could restore you to sanity. But if you look back over your experience the chances are that at certain times you have come to believe other things might do the trick also. Like a pill, a doctor, a counsellor, a new job, a new town, a new boyfriend, a new diet, a new excercise regime, the list is endless of the things we have tried that we thought might fix us.

Getting near the end of the road we have got to know a lot about what does not work. Then we find oursleves sitting in a room full of people who give the credit for their sobriety to some kind of higher power, which we dont understand.

The good news is we don't have to. The whole point of the steps is to get us connected with our own conception of a higher power, but this comes as the result of the steps, not always at the start.

So in step two we can ask our selves do I believe or am I even willing to believe that the same power that helped these people might help me too? If it is a no, then maybe there is some other recovery option we should try.

If it is yes it could happen, we move on to step 3 which is simply a decision to carry out the program and we put step three into effect by starting step 4.

Call it a leap of blind faith, but the result of the steps for me was that after step5 I began to really experience this higher power thing. It became real.

The gnostic belief system can be described as knowledge through experience, and it was through actual experience gained through taking the steps that I got to know God. I could never have bought the idea on faith alone, I had to experience it. Keep an open mind and you may join millions of others in that.

Jsober

For me step 3 is a reminder that I am not in charge. What is? I don't know, it's a mystery, but its not me. I can fight the the way things are or I can choose to let go and roll with life. You don't have to be religious or believe in a god to make life smoother.

MIRecovery

No matter how badly you want the sun not to rise in the morning, it is going to rise. Is this not a power greater than yourself?

sugarbear1

After working through the steps, specifically through step 7, I lost the desire and obsession to drink or use. I attribute this to something more powerful than me.

My life continued to improve after this and I worked through all those steps at 2 weeks of sobriety.

I saw my patterns of behavior and I learned many things about me by working those steps.

Simple, not easy. No need to define any god or to even believe it was a god. Just something worked.

bullmas

Debbie329 : I feel your pain , myself being open minded (agnostic ) however reality is, what it is , .

I never been ordered to attend "AA" however , keeping a DUI off my record would be priority , so I would definitely go the meetings and make the best of it.

Make your sobriety a reality!!

Cheers

Solushun

All steps cant be done without a sponsor. It includes reading- usually big book which is the main literature. Mine has me read also the 12 steps and 12 traditions book- just the step that is relative.. Then she decides if I seem ready to move on to next step. Step one is the only one u have to have it done absolutely perfectly.. That we were defeated by the drink and surrendered. If we are picking up the drink we have not done step one and need to start at step one again. As far as sponsorships- they should have done(been taught) all 12 steps themselves and can pass down the knowledge. Some of the steps require actions like confessing to sponsor (choose one that don't gossip), and the sponsor will also choose who in your life to go talk to and how to make amends.. None of these should be done by yourself alone and lastly, the steps should be done in sequence of completion. As far as step 3: it's about letting go and having faith in a power greater than yourself.. U do need to believe in a HP first which you establish in step 2.. The sponsor will confirm you believe in one or not in step 2. We all want the quick fix. But we can't undo something in a couple of months of havoc we created for decades. Just go with the flow and stay in today. Allow yourself to be loved until you learn to love you. Be well.

zjw

I believe in God. But there are a lot of things I'd like to think that i did in life without him etc.. But getting sober and getting out of that pit aint no way in hell i coulda done that on my own. Its sort of humiliating in a good way. Like no way I can do this on my own.

I'd like to think if I did not believe in God and was at a time like that in my life. I'd invent the moon god or something to believe in anything I woulda wished myself to be sober even anything to cling to other then myself because I felt so powerless and needed help from someone or something to get me to straighten up.

I guess my point is if you dont believe in a higher power thats fine but if your like me you might wanna find something or someone to cling too to help you sober up and climb up out of the pit.

Ken33xx

Take what you need and leave the rest.

Remember AA meetings and members can be very clickish.

Find a few meetings where you feel comfortable and take it from there.

Solushun

This isn't exactly AA but I have a little box called the God box. I put my worries on a piece of paper and stick it in the box and let it go. I also heard someone say she writes her concerns on a balloon and let it fly away. Those are step 3 concept of "Made a decision to turn our will and our life over to the care of God as we understand him". (I'm writing this out for reference)

Berrybean

I have heard almost as many explanations of what people's HP is as the number of people I have asked. Mine has changed a few times over the last 19 months.

Currently I am happy to accept that:

• I am not it.
• I don't understand what it is or where it is. (It suddenly struck me that I was possibly being just 'slightly' arrogant thinking that I, out of all humans that have ever mulled the question in their head, should be the one to figure it out.)
• If I can't control something, then perhaps I should just stop trying to 'pull the elephant by it's tail' and let my HP worry about the bloody elephants. My job is to keep my side of the street clean, stay sober, and just try to behave in a way that doesn't fill me with shame or remorse.

Debbie329

Beccybean.......the meeting I'm going to tonight is called......Hard to be humble at none other that the college I graduated from. Isn't that funny. It's was originally an all women's college in 1976 they decided to let men in.

120degrees0ut

HI Debbie329....All these comments here are Great. Yea, i think your HP could be whatever U wanted it to be? Not everyone is religious, so no biggie really. Just as long as youre at a meeting, Good For U! I was thinking of starting meetings again. i found out theres one meeting a wk close to me. And I was hoping to meet people? Since i am new in state Im in. I hope your meeting goes well for Ya!

Gottalife

P 45 puts it very clearly.

...." But where and how were we to find this power?

Well, that is exactly what this book is about. It's main object is to enable you to find a power greater than yourself which will solve your problem"

Follow the directions, find the Power, problem solved.

Debbie329

As part of Friday's meeting we read some of the blue book......how did they come up w the idea of making the book blue.....maybe because alcohol causes the blues?

Marylynn123456

i remember i had a lot of trouble with that for years and still do. Dont worry just listen and theres no rush. I made the meeting my higher power for a long time as far as turning it over that is a rough one and i was there 7 years and still have trouble especially when life happens. Dont worry yourself so much about it just go and listen and things will fall into place. You will find your own way just relax and try to learn something especially from the older folks. They been around awhile and know about life and have had many life experiences thats what i did. I listened to the older people and it helped me tremendously and dont let anyone force things down tour throat. It will just stress u. That happened to me with certain people. Just ignore that. Dont rush it. Like i said relax take what u can and forget the rest. Some of it just wont b a fit for u. Just like some of the stuff i heard wasnt for me. I had to find what was right for me and meeting the right people helped but i also had to watch out for others u will know in your gut. Take it slowly. Theres no rush. U can for now just focus on the first step and not worry about all this cause u will drive yourself crazy. I was just like u. And i stressed myself for nothing. No rush go slowly and take a few breaths. Dont worry about all the steps in time it works out. Focus on the first step. It is good your going to the meeting to see what they have to say. But in the beginning i went to newcomer meetings so i wouldnt go crazy over the steps. Cause i use to get overwhelmed omg i gotta do this and i gotta do that it was unnecessary i hope i made some sense and u get something out of my rambling