Behavior of "Recovered" Alcoholics

Closed Thread Subscribe

Page 2 of 2

Thread Tools

10-16-2015, 09:16 AM

# 21 (permalink)

JeffreyAK

Member

Join Date: Jan 2015

Posts: 1,183

Quote:

Originally Posted by alybally

... I don't know how you guys think I'm stereotyping. I'm talking about two very specific people and pretty much wondering if this is their inner addict causing them to behave this way.

Help me here, I'm not sure what you mean by "inner addict". It *sounds* like stereotyping, the addictive personality myth or once-an-addict-always-an-addict. Addiction is chemical dependency, a physical brain disorder that has physical as well as personality symptoms. Those go away once you quit and stay quit, and you're left being just another person, not necessarily a saint.

10-16-2015, 09:16 AM

# 22 (permalink)

ScottFromWI

Forum Leader

Join Date: May 2012

Location: Wisconsin, USA

Posts: 16,945

Quote:

Originally Posted by alybally

I'm also trying to get a sense of whether most alcoholics become non-selfish and kinder when truly recovered or if the selfishness is more of a common underlying personality characteristic too.

Even if you found the answer you seek on this ( which I doubt you will as it's much too subjective ), what would you do with the end result?

If you know someone in recovery who is still acting selfishly this data won't change that.

10-16-2015, 09:17 AM

# 23 (permalink)

Dropsie

Member

Join Date: Sep 2015

Posts: 3,163

PS. Just saw your post. Thanks.

10-16-2015, 09:50 AM

# 24 (permalink)

biminiblue

Member

Join Date: Mar 2014

Posts: 25,373

10-16-2015, 10:13 AM

# 25 (permalink)

svenissober

Member

Join Date: Sep 2015

Location: Germany

Posts: 81

Quote:

Originally Posted by alybally

Okay, but help me understand one thing here. An active addict can behave in a selfish and egotistical way and when they become sober completely stop being that way, right? If so, do you find that to be the majority of the minority?

Being dry isn´t the same as being sober. Check out dry drunk syndrome, this gives you the answer.
Get dry and you´re still the same person minus the booze. Getting sober means the underling defects of character are removed.

10-16-2015, 10:15 AM

# 26 (permalink)

svenissober

Member

Join Date: Sep 2015

Location: Germany

Posts: 81

Personality issues are not only on symptom level. They are often at the root of the issue I reckon.

10-16-2015, 10:17 AM

# 27 (permalink)

Anna

Administrator

Join Date: Aug 2003

Location: Dancing in the Light

Posts: 61,476

Quote:

Originally Posted by alybally

I'm also trying to get a sense of whether most alcoholics become non-selfish and kinder when truly recovered or if the selfishness is more of a common underlying personality characteristic too. I don't think the alcoholism is irrelevant at all considering all of the literature on alcoholism and self esteem and how it tremendously affects someone's personality. I think it's a legitimate question.

My goodness, there are many, many people in the world who are selfish and unkind, but are not alcoholics. And, there are many, many alcoholics in the world who are not selfish and unkind. Your comments are extremely stereotypical. You don't have to look very far on SR to see alcoholics and recovering alcoholics who have all kinds of different character traits.

10-16-2015, 10:21 AM

# 28 (permalink)

Venecia

Member

Join Date: Oct 2013

Location: Midwest

Posts: 4,860

Thank you, Anna. And thank you, Scott. Your observations are wise and gracious.

It's been difficult to read this thread and see alcoholics lumped together under one big selfish, unkind umbrella.

10-16-2015, 10:51 AM

# 29 (permalink)

tomsteve

Member

Join Date: Apr 2012

Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.

Posts: 15,281

ok, ill turn the table.
what is it with people that havent been alcoholics or addicts saying how we should be acting?
doesnt seem like maturity to me.

let it goooooooooooooo.

10-16-2015, 11:17 AM

# 30 (permalink)

freshstart57

Self recovered Self discovered

Join Date: Aug 2011

Location: Toronto Canada

Posts: 5,148

Quote:

Originally Posted by alybally

Of course an addict, once sober, can behave better, in fact, you would hope so. But really, wouldn't you want everyone to stop being selfish egotistical jerks?

It seems from your writing that you have some preconceived notions about the topic. These are limiting and self-defeating don't you think?