Where I'm At
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Eaton, OH
Posts: 7
Where I'm At
Hey all. Completely new here but not to recovery. I am a very very chronic alcoholic. I tried to post a few days ago with my whole alcoholism related story and found myself writing several thousand words about it so I threw it into MS Word and I write a bit more every night. It's the first time I've tried to put everything (I could remember) on paper. As for what's going on now, I relapsed almost a month (this Sunday) ago after nearly two years sober. I've been actively attending groups nearly every night of the week though I wasn't when I relapsed for a week and a half. During that time I got my first dui and went through more terrible withdrawals while in jail. I experienced a terrifying bout of withdrawal psychosis and wet brain. Scariest thing I've ever been through. I'm surprised I came back from it and not stuffed inside my own head for the rest of my life. I've experienced a few seizures while withdrawing over the years but this was a whole other thing. While there I also lost my job. Its all been very catastrophic and I'm still picking up the pieces and none of it would be possible without the help of my counselors and friends. Working at it every day though. One job is imminent and I have an interview with another tomorrow but I'm still at great risk of being evicted if one of these doesn't come through. Things are very difficult right now. I'm glad I came across this message board. Oh yea, turned 38 in jail too. That was an eye-opener. Uggh.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 287
Wow yt... quite a story.. we have some things in common.. i have never quit drinking before.. this is my first time and im a little over 2 months sober.. i also just got another dui.. if convicted it will be my 3rd.. i am a over road truckdriver and got a dui couple months ago morning after a heavy drinking night.. i was out of state as well.. i am 35 years old and will probably be needing a career change as well.. how were things the 2 yrs of your sobriety? Im always curious cuz ive never been sober, besides now
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Welcome, yeahtoast, to SR. You will find an abundance of support, encouragement and understanding here.
I am glad that you have face to face support. SR is another great tool for your sobriety. Look around the site; there's much useful information and helpful tips.
You may also want to join a class. I'll post the link to the Class of October 2015 in a moment.
I am glad that you have face to face support. SR is another great tool for your sobriety. Look around the site; there's much useful information and helpful tips.
You may also want to join a class. I'll post the link to the Class of October 2015 in a moment.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Eaton, OH
Posts: 7
Gonzo... It was very difficult every minute of every day at first. My cravings did become more and more diluted over time though. The most difficult part for me was learning how to live a life sober while also sneaking up on middle age. This is still a challenge for me to this day. I was drinking nearly a half gallon of vodka every day at my worst and I had lost all interest in things I'd always enjoyed. Those came back among many other things. Friends I'd alienated, family I'd shut out, other relationships I'd destroyed, et cetera. I think I'll post what I've written so far on a blog here for everyone's thoughts. I think there's a blog option here anyway.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 287
Yeah
To be honest the cravings i have not really experienced to bad.. i was not drinking quite as much but was an every day drinker and a lot of blackout drinking... so glad you found this site.. im 35 and fear creeps up on me about my future.. i find a lot of support with AA and this site..
To be honest the cravings i have not really experienced to bad.. i was not drinking quite as much but was an every day drinker and a lot of blackout drinking... so glad you found this site.. im 35 and fear creeps up on me about my future.. i find a lot of support with AA and this site..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Eaton, OH
Posts: 7
I know how you feel Trez. Anytime I had to do anything that prevented drinking for any length of time had the potential to rapidly become hell. For me, one of the worst things was the inability to sleep and it was always very embarrassing when my hands shook and others noticed while trying to write or type.
FLCamper, yes I'd like to think that the damage I've done to myself over the years hasn't pushed my middle age to somewhere around where I'm at now. That's why whenever I talk about or around it with others I leave it as sneaking up on middle age, heh
.
As an aside, I'm well past my withdrawals, can sleep just fine now, eat just fine, my hands still shake slightly and I expect them to for some time, and I believe and am told that I made a full recovery from my brush with wet brain. That is some very scary stuff after reading about it afterwards. I have a job interview in four hours and hope to hear a response about the other today as well. Another mtg tonight at 5:30 too.
FLCamper, yes I'd like to think that the damage I've done to myself over the years hasn't pushed my middle age to somewhere around where I'm at now. That's why whenever I talk about or around it with others I leave it as sneaking up on middle age, heh
. As an aside, I'm well past my withdrawals, can sleep just fine now, eat just fine, my hands still shake slightly and I expect them to for some time, and I believe and am told that I made a full recovery from my brush with wet brain. That is some very scary stuff after reading about it afterwards. I have a job interview in four hours and hope to hear a response about the other today as well. Another mtg tonight at 5:30 too.
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