JMJ1998

I'm starting to get better now but I'm worried about my health because I have a slight discomfort in my right side that has went away before when I stopped drinking... I know there's a lot I could say but I just know I think this is the longest I've been drinking straight for almost ten months and I know I was clean for about almost two years before that and I don't usually drink everyday except before when I drank a lot for five months but I always had to get clean for one reason or another... This is the first time I felt the discomfort and I also feel like I'm getting anxious a lot more... I want to get better... I know I can because I don't feel that pull toward it like I used to because I know it's destorying everything and I'm lucky to have what I have now considering... I just am afraid and I don't have the resources to get me to a doctor... I am looking for support and just to be able to feel normal again...

fantail

Hi J, Welcome. You'll find a lot of support here. I was so anxious towards the end of my last relapse that I was basically agoraphobic for a couple weeks. And I was physically wrecked too. It's a little over 2 months since I stopped and I feel wonderful. You can get there too! Do you have a plan?

Soberwolf

Welcome JM

IOAA2

Hi.
"I just am afraid and I don't have the resources to get me to a doctor... I am looking for support and just to be able to feel normal again... "

Hi.
By stringing a lot of one days at a time in a row of not drinking you will feel better and start to enjoy the fruits of being sober.
With this come saving $$$ so medical advice is obtainable.

Good things start when we are sober, keep coming.

BE WELL

waynetheking

Stay with us jm...it gets better.

Madmartigan

Believe it when you here alcoholism is progressive in every sense. The withdraw gets worse and the binges get worse at least for me. The first time I seriously attempted to quit I felt close to back to normal after about 4-5 days as far as physical withdraw. I relapsed for about 1-2 months and am currently on day 7 of my second attempt and I still don't feel right. However, I do feel better and better everyday even if it's only a little. I don't ever want to have to start this over and I'm sure you don't either.

JMJ1998

Thank you all for your replies... It definitely helps... I feel better every day too and sometimes I just worry too much... If you would know I tend to do that quite often and some ppl who do know me understand that I can be serious and sometimes a party pooper... But. I know that from what I have researched... Bad I know... But I think the discomfort I feel may be from a enlarged liver or fatty liver? I don't know about anything else other than worse complications... The ppl I ask say that there are others who drink a lot more for a lot longer than I have and they are doing ok but I know not all cases are the same... I don't want to deal with waking up everyday feeling like s*** or reliving some stupid mistake or something terrible... I know a lot of ppl who have died from this some my own family and a few friends and I want to be able to learn from what I've seen... I have known for a while that alcohol was never good for me especially when I first started but I've had a lot of problems with my life and sometimes I just wanted to leave everything behind no matter what because I wouldn't deal with reality or the trauma... But I really appreciate your responses and if anyone has similar experience with the whole side discomfort I would really like opinions... Its not a pain just odd and it does come and go with drinking... I know no one can replace a doctor and I intend to see one... I THANK you all and I hope we can support each other through recovery... Still have resolve today and looking forward to tomorrow...

JMJ1998

I know it is never easy. When I went through my first recovery it was because I was forced to by the court... And a few times after that before I decided I didn't want to spend my life in and out of jail... Then I met someone during my last sobriety and when it was over it didn't immediately blow up in my face again it was slow moving before it started to get worse but this time it was horrible because I care for the person still am with them but now I know I have to focus on me.. Reliving everything I did or said to them or their family being wheeled out by the ambulance on top of being a bum basically with no job I hated me... Still struggle with it... I definitely understand not wanting to have to repeat the process everytime and I congratulate you on your accomplishment so far that is really outstanding because like they say everyday is different with new obstacles and new experiences that can be either good or bad that can have us all choose to think we can go back... Some ppl are able but I know I'm not ready and I don't think I ever will.. Its in my family... But I know the struggle... I was clean for almost a week before relapsing just because I felt better and I thought "Well it is the weekend".. Then ended up missing work and on the verge right now to lose everything... But now I know I need to get clean... Still have all the withdrawals more mental than physical... Sleeplessness and fatigue... Feeling anxious... I know it is a big step every time and I'm not going to discredit any moment I can be able to say no and feel like I do now... For me it's not worth anything just like the **** we flush down the toilet because that's all it is... Keep up the progress!