before my mind goes to the gutter
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Join Date: Mar 2014
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Originally Posted by zjw 
biminiblue I think i've grown a lot and complain less then I once did but the idea of just not complaining at all still gets me. Its almost like some can seem oblivious to the problems they may have. and at times I"m pretty oblivious to mine. IE just not focused on them etc.. But sooner or later I gotta face them and theres always that part of me going GRRRRRR.
Yeah, I get that. Denial and procrastination are real foes. Focusing on other peoples' problems is what you don't like, though - right? So, I mean, if they're oblivious - so be it.
It's much easier to focus on other peoples' issues than to fix my own. Staying out of other peoples' head is much more peaceful, though.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
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one things for sure i handled it better this time then i would have 4 years ago But i still got work to do. I know we spoke of avoidance thats the strategy i'm using with my grandparents. its sad but it is what it is. I just avoid them and i'm happy 
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I cant simply avoid this particular relative all the time however. Usually he ignores me in favor of other people at the table but no one was around with this gathering so he had ot pay attention to me. next time will be easier there will be others around and i can just vanish in the crowd like usual.
.I cant simply avoid this particular relative all the time however. Usually he ignores me in favor of other people at the table but no one was around with this gathering so he had ot pay attention to me. next time will be easier there will be others around and i can just vanish in the crowd like usual
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Join Date: Jun 2012
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my mom just asks if she can take some of the kids to see the grandparents. mind my moms driving is not so good some of my kdis dont even know her and most barely know her and only 2 have ever even met the grand parents. I'm like umm no i'm not comfortable with that idea mom sorry.
Then I mentioned it to my wife. and said ya know perhaps if my grand parents spent more time asking themselves whats wrong with me how come no one ever brings there grand kids around what have i done wrong instead of being so quick to point out whats wrong with everyone else people would bring there kids around. Perhaps if in the 10 years i've lived 2 hours from them they maybe ONCE put forth the effort to come see me like they have other grand kids i'd consider taking my kids there. But I'm in no mood for the verbal abuse and criticism i'll get by going there.
Some may rememeber the last time i went there it morphed into a trhead on this board! and I decided it would be a long long time if ever that i'd go see them again! One person can only stand so much. My mom probabbly sees no issue with me going there and spending a week or something. I'd be drinken like a fish with in a day fo that nightmere.
Then I mentioned it to my wife. and said ya know perhaps if my grand parents spent more time asking themselves whats wrong with me how come no one ever brings there grand kids around what have i done wrong instead of being so quick to point out whats wrong with everyone else people would bring there kids around. Perhaps if in the 10 years i've lived 2 hours from them they maybe ONCE put forth the effort to come see me like they have other grand kids i'd consider taking my kids there. But I'm in no mood for the verbal abuse and criticism i'll get by going there.
Some may rememeber the last time i went there it morphed into a trhead on this board! and I decided it would be a long long time if ever that i'd go see them again! One person can only stand so much. My mom probabbly sees no issue with me going there and spending a week or something. I'd be drinken like a fish with in a day fo that nightmere.
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