freespirit1986

I quit for a while and now here I am back to square one. I'm not sure what caused this relapse but I feel horrible for it. i need some words of encouragement.

Hawk07

Hi Freespirit. The fact that you're back on here posting and asking for help is great first of all. Don't beat yourself up. Never give up hope because you can do this with the right plan in action and perseverance.

So perhaps your previous plan to quit drinking just needs a bit of tweaking. Think about what your trigger was to pick up that first drink. That's always where it starts. What can you do to avoid that happening again in the future?

Dee74

Welcome back freespirit

how did you stay sober last time?
can you think of things to add this time to make it better?

D

endlesspatience

Well done for reaching out. Nearly all of us have relapsed. I have drunk four or five times this year, despite not wanting to do so.

I am sure the best way to get out of the destructive cycle of drinking, stopping then drinking again is to make a plan and stick to it. Loads of people on this site have done that and they can help you if you post regularly.

I know that one of your concerns is the impact of drinking on your health and therefore the impact on your children. That should remain a motivating factor to get well. So sometimes, words of encouragement here will reflect our real concern that the negative consequences will increase if you go on drinking.

Here's a useful piece of motivation which is on the front page of this website:

10 Reasons to Stay Sober Today

Gottalife

Hi Freespirit.

I guess I would encourage you to review progress so far. Many drink again during their early attempts to sober up. It is not so much a relapse as a stepping stone to recovery. Each time I fell off the wagon I learned a bit more about what does not work, and I survived longe enough to find something that does.

In your shoes I might be asking myself "how serious is this problem?" and "what am I prepared to do to recover from it?' A lot of us place restrictions on what we will do, like I'll only do that if..., and I'm not prepared to do that at all etc. Each time we pick up again, we get rid of some of those restrictions until we are ready to do whatever it takes, and when we are ready to do whatever it takes, we usually recover.

advbike

I relapsed many times, but always tried to learn something from it. I found that usually I had already mentally decided to drink well before I actually bought and opened the beer. So the key for me was to find ways to shut down those early thoughts of a drink before they turned into action.

doggonecarl

Actually, you have not quit for that long, freespirit. Hence the struggle. Early recovery is tough, and if you are new to quitting, then its difficulty can really catch you by surprise. Notice how your fear of liver failure failed to keep you sober?

I'm not sure what you were doing for your recovery besides just putting down the alcohol and logging into SR, but the relapse should show you THIS IS SERIOUS. Treat it as such. Get the support and help you need to maintain sobriety. That may mean face-to-face support and a formal recovery program. If you want to get sober, you can, but you have to do the things you need to do to stay sober.

freespirit1986

Thank you guys. Yes, it hasn't been long since I attempted to quit. I feel like q failure but I need to keep trying. I know I can do it. I just need to fond it within myself. I quit last year when I found out I was pregnant. I still don't know why I even went back to it. Its nice to know that some of you remember me and what I've posted in the past. i want to thank you all for the advice and responses. Here's to another try at this .

pulltight

Any day sober is a win even if they aren't strung together. Keep moving forward, you got it this time!

Rar

Keep with it FreeSpirit. You did good posting and getting right back on the wagon. Keep stringing those sober days together and post when you start thinking about drinking or get the urge. We're here for you.

Music

It's actually not rocket science. You drank again because you decided to drink again! The question is: What's going on in your life that gives you the idea that drinking will make things better? Other questions: Do you go to meetings? Do you have a sponsor? Have you been diligently working the steps? I've never known anyone who drank when they were busy staying sober. Maybe you just weren't busy enough staying sober.

Soberwolf

Having a plan really helps

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...SMA12-4474.pdf

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

SoberAlky

We will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it.

waynetheking

Dont beat yourself up over this. Just try again. Take action by keeping yourself busy and getting support. Remember, alcoholism is a deadly disease. I myself prayed a lot. You can do this. We're here for ya.

D122y

Congrats on making it back.

Have you tried Bill W.s method?

AA Big Book, pg. 13, para. 2.

D122y

It worked for Bill and me...

freespirit1986

No I have not read that. Thanks I will go look now.

TGIRecovered

Rememember this: " We are without defense against the first drink".
( BB Ch. 2)

You did not CHOOSE to start drinking again. Believe what you read in the Big Book. When we fully rely on our Higher Power; not our own power, the obsession will be lifted.

Alcoholism is a disease; not a moral deficiency, not a matter of will power.

You are doing the next right thing, which is to start over. It's not easy, but if you pick yourself up and keep going, you will get there and relief will be yours!

oak

Welcome back. It took me a few tries before I got sober long-term. You have the experience of being sober in the past, so you can use that to help motivate you now.

Post here a lot. Get as much support as you can.

bullmas

"I still don't know why I even went back to it."

I don't know why I kept going back to it either! ,I know its just a mental temporary quick fix, with a long term painful price tag,

freespirit1986,

What is done is done, get back in the game.

Cheers