Berrybean

Yes - we fear rejection so we get in quick and make sure that WE get to be the ones that put the brakes on the relationship. We do that a lot.

It's funny, the whole phrasing around apologies. Like, " I gave her an apology..." The thing is with 'giving' something is that as soon as we expect something (even a reaction - physical or emotional) in return, then we're not giving something. It's more a trade, or barter. Maybe he has accepted the apology as freely given and doesn't realise that it was given with an expectation.

If you are female and he is male, it might also be that the private nature of a personal letter is putting him in a tricky position within the group. I think it could easily open him up to criticism and even suspicion as it is always strongly suggested in the groups I attend, that in 1:1 situations men stick with the men and women with the women. If this were the case, he could be hoping that you will keep chats more 'in the open' if he does not encourage letters by acknowledging them.

OR he might be going through his own stuff right now.

There are lots of possible reasons... and only one way to know. Why not just keep it simple and just talk to him. Explain that you've been worrying whether you did the right thing writing to him and tell him you hope you're okay. Much easier than all that maybe this and maybe that, and mind reading and having conversations with people who aren't in the room.

dru1085

I think that was a great idea, especially if you wrote the note sober. Your friend should really respect that. They say the truth comes out when your drunk , I disagree.. Anger , hate,self pity, fake emotions comes out because your brain and mind isn't clear. Only your brain tells you that your really getting things off ur chest because its clouded by alcohol. making amends with those you've hurt or gone astray in the past while sober is the best way imo. Ive recovered a couple friends that really respect that Ive come out with a problem of drinking, acknowledged it and am trying to find a solution to fix myself and then the people and things around me. **** aint easy mate .Props to you.

Cheers

Dru