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I created a genogram of my family - wow

Old 08-18-2015, 07:02 AM
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I created a genogram of my family - wow

Per Wiki:
A genogram (also known as a McGoldrick-Gerson study, a Lapidus Schematic or a Family Diagram) is a pictorial display of a person's family relationships and medical history. It goes beyond a traditional family tree by allowing the user to visualize hereditary patterns and psychological factors that punctuate relationships. It can be used to identify repetitive patterns of behavior and to recognize hereditary tendencies.



I only went back 3 generations on my mother's side of the family (I know nothing about my dad's family). A lot of mental illness and drug/alcohol abuse. I wish I had known this before I picked up a drink. I am not blaming my alcoholism on family history, but it is another part of the puzzle. Genes load the gun and environment pulls the trigger.
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Old 08-18-2015, 07:49 AM
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Knowing about our past is important. More important is what we do today to help ourselves as the past cannot be changed. I have no history of alcoholism in my immediate family or even the previous generation, but I turned out to be a raging everyday binge drinker. I also have no family history of anxiety yet I've been diagnosed with GAD.
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Old 08-18-2015, 08:32 AM
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Hi AF,

Just some musings I've had this morning myself, independently of your post and before I saw it. I've done things like that, too. I even had my genome sequenced and analyzed a large portion of the data myself with a special emphasis on genotypes that have been associated with addictions and other psychiatric illnesses in the research literature. So I know a lot of that *** about myself. Not that I wish I would not.

On digging into the past and tracing the origin of my motivations, desires, insecurities, problems, whatever... tons of these over the years as well and especially in the past ~1 year. It's interesting, and often it gets also frustrating and maddening. Why? I think because simply coming up with even the most brilliant intellectual insights does not help or advance it much. I think that we can understand the entire universe (within ourselves and externally) back and forth and everywhere in between... I think that the main cause of turmoil, getting stuck, and many psychological issues that get in the way of our moving on and advancement is that the emotional components have not been properly dealt with. Or in the case of identifying these kinds of biological heritage things, when the potential (or already manifested) consequences are not treated properly, either in preventive ways or in curative ways. So going back to our main topic here: getting all the necessary tools and help in our recovery, since that's what we can influence, biology is given to a large extent especially in adults.

Generate that progressive and supportive environment -- that's the true weapon we can carry and aim constructively to disarm the genes
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Old 08-18-2015, 08:51 AM
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I have never created a genogram but I am aware of enough alcoholism in my generation and previous generations to know that a genogram of my family would look rather bleak.

I can only pray that breaking the cycle, behaviorally, will have an impact on younger/future generations.
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Old 08-18-2015, 09:17 AM
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Mental illness and addiction is very strong in both sides of my family...I have always known this...having the knowledge didn't stop me from picking up...I of course thought I was the exception
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Old 08-18-2015, 09:19 AM
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Originally Posted by ArtFriend View Post

I only went back 3 generations on my mother's side of the family (I know nothing about my dad's family). A lot of mental illness and drug/alcohol abuse. I wish I had known this before I picked up a drink. I am not blaming my alcoholism on family history, but it is another part of the puzzle. Genes load the gun and environment pulls the trigger.
Really? The knowledge of this would have stopped you from drinking??? Not me, I would have toasted them!

I load the gun, I point it at myself and choose what's next. If I need help, I seek it. I was a volunteer, not a victim.

We have a choice in life - get to work getting better or fret over the shadows of what's past.......
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Old 08-18-2015, 09:38 AM
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I had to do this for a class I am taking. I am trying to finish my master's degree.
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Old 08-18-2015, 09:40 AM
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It is so true. After I became sober I looked at my family history and found lots of addiction on both sides. Jackpot. I will take a proactive approach with my kids.
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Old 08-18-2015, 09:43 AM
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Originally Posted by ArtFriend View Post
I had to do this for a class I am taking. I am trying to finish my master's degree.
That is very cool. I also sequenced and analyzed my genome as part of a class a while ago -- it was optional to do it on ourselves but it would not be me not taking the opportunity, especially for free. Good luck in your masters program
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Old 08-18-2015, 11:06 AM
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Originally Posted by ArtFriend View Post
I only went back 3 generations on my mother's side of the family...A lot of mental illness and drug/alcohol abuse. I wish I had known this before I picked up a drink.
I know very little about genetics, but as Gregor Mendel, the founder of the modern science of genetics, so famously said, "The coconut doesn't fall far from the tree."
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Old 08-18-2015, 02:13 PM
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For me, my family history is beyond bleak. My father and my aunt, his sister, were alcoholics, as is my brother. No other relatives on that side.

On my mother's side, my first aunt's son, my cousin, is an alcoholic and addict, now recovered but with a very limited life. My second aunt had 7 children, and all 6 of the boys were addicts and/or alcoholics as was her husband. He died of alcoholism, and 3 of her sons are dead from drugs and/or alcohol, 2 of them permanently disabled and only one is a recovered alcoholic with a semblance of a normal life. My mother's brother was an alcoholic, and of his 9 children, only 2 or 3 live normal non-addicted lives. It was particularly devastating for my male relatives, whatever the genetics of that mean.

I remember being at a family reunion many years ago for my maternal grandmother's 100th birthday celebration, and as I looked around that room at the profound dysfunction and damaged lives that had survived her, I vowed to do all I could to stop that cycle from continuing with me and my children.

My children, as a result of my stern and perhaps overdone approach to addiction, are healthy and have always been so. I, however, married a second husband who was an abusive alcoholic, so while I survived without addiction myself, the addictive livestyle was all too present in my mindset.

Now three years out of that marriage, at age 65, I have worked hard to understand and move beyond that model of life, and am happier and more serene than I have ever been. And my children and grandchildren have a very good shot at happy normal lives. (I am, however, still superstitious when I say that, and just tapped the desk 3 times...)

My own rules for myself are that I never drink alone; don't drink at home except when I have dinner guests; never drink more than 2 glasses of wine; and, most particularly, when I really "WANT" another glass of wine, that is the signal to not touch another drop.

I'm lucky that I can enforce that easily for myself and I tried my hardest to educate and forewarn my children. Here's hoping that we've turned the corner with this generation. It is a terrifying, devastating, cunning and relentless disease that physically ensnares its victims long before they know their shoulder has been tapped.

I have great admiration for those many of you on this board who have vanquished this devil, and always, I send my you prayers and good wishes.

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Old 08-18-2015, 02:52 PM
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It's fascinating (and scary) stuff for sure.

Genes can be trumped tho.
I'm not going to die from this like so many of my ancestors

D
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Old 08-19-2015, 02:42 AM
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100,000% what D said
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