Quirky

Cow, you are something else! I enjoy everything you write so, so much.
To say you are witty is an understatement...
Glad your car problem wasn't too big, and I'm impressed that you were able to fix it yourself.
You pretty darn smart cow...
Gail

Kris47

See Cow,

You can make things happen. Good on you. Hope you feel better today.

puffy

Hey Cow. Checking in. Getting my hair buzzed so that it doesn't come out in clumps when I get Chemo. Going Sinead O'Connor style I guess. If you have any cool ideas how I can sport my new do', bring it on. I'm not a girly scarf wearing type. Maybe I will wear ballcaps or a Daniel Boone cap with the squirrel tail.

Anyhow, hope your days are well.
Puffy

walkbeformakrun

Hey puffy,

How about a Kentucky Derby style hat!



http://www.sugarbushsquirrel.com/

Just kidding! Sorry for your loss, Lol.

Ok I will stop now. I hope you will be ok! Really.

fini

puffy,
best to you for that upcoming treatment.
the hair thing is an extra bummer; i have a friend who simply wore her head. her bald head.
she was gorgeous; wrinkles and all (58 at the time)

but then, it's easy to see someone else as gorgeous; not so easy when it's you.

sending good thoughts.

Cow

Hey Puff, I tomboy my self. I think I just go with whatever most comfortable. Since it summer maybe light bandana or super lightweight fabric pull on to protect from sun. I sure you can total rock a simple babushka.

Well, today was big fat fake out for Cow! I wake up this morning and, just for a moment, I thought, OMG! Can it be? I kind of sort of maybe not feel too bad! Then as the sweet haze of sleep dissipate, I realize, nope, shht! I still feel like crap! Dammit!

But I keepa go. Almost got in verbal fisticuffs today, cuz, you know, you does not mess with recovering cow. Hello, everybody know that!

puffy

Thanks all for the suggestions. Walkbeformakrun...cute link.
Finis- I've entertained the bald idea. So far, with my hair buzzed it looks kinda cool but once the hair goes away I will reevaluate.
Cow- people can really push the buttons sometimes especially when you are just trying to survive.

Off to get my port installed. So much fun.
Puffy

Yellow1111

Cow, as many have echoed, it's wonderful to see you (and everyone else) back here! All very inspiring, as well as good for a chuckle.

I haven't posted in ages, mostly because I am not sober. It seems inappropriate on a board where everyone is working so hard and doing SO WELL. I can go several days pretty easily, but then a few in a row of 3-4 glasses of wine. While I don't believe I'm an alcoholic, alcohol abuser would probably fit. (If I were in to labels, which thankfully I am NOT. )

Cow, I remember your caffeine issue and other posters have talked about other triggers as well. Caffeine, specifically Tejava TEA, is my go to. Coffee isn't as "smooth" in my brain, and when it wears off...UGH. Though, I've recently weaned my self off my cold-pressed organic rocky mountain whatever brew. I would allow myself 3 sips in the morning as you know...all the "bulletproof" people say how GOOD it is for you. Coconut oil in my coffee! My brain is working soooo much better! Yikes.

I've kept a little journal and there is a definite correlation for me with caffeine/alcohol abuse. However, quite frankly...I am really struggling with the "sober from everything" issue. I can't even imagine pulling it off. Would love to hear thoughts. The rest of what I ingest is beyond natural healthy organic. No grains, sugar, etc. (ethanol excluded). It's just...the liquid issue.

Hope everyone is well. Perhaps I should have made a separate thread, but I can't resist posting HERE. Sorry for the lapse and possible thread jack!
Yellow

Cow

Yellow, please my friend, half of my 11 chapter of Diary posts was written hammered. It take me forever to do it, and nobody here make me feel persona non grata for that. You is welcome here. Capice?

For me, I had to give up the caffeine. (and bunch of other foods) But caffeine was head of the snake. Main trigger. I could not get and will not stay sober if I even dabbles with the caffeine. Yes, it suck, it feel like so much unfair deprivations, but at some point you gotta do what you gotta do.

Ajax

I recommend a hat with a raccoon tail. Very fashionable and comes with ability to be extra clever and wily. You are already brave, dear Puffy.❤️

Yellow1111

Cow, thank you!

I'm feeling ridiculous right now. I have a caffeine addiction, and dear Puffy has cancer. Robby and Ajax facing all kinds of hell, still post such kind words supporting OTHERS. Caffeine? Serious jackass in need of buns kicking here.

Puffy, you are going to do this beautifully. This board is full of outstanding and really dam TOUGH souls. You have wonderful support! Sending a big hug to you.

Cow. IF YOU can quit, I can! (Actually, I'm not sure, but I'm going to think of you every morning and use that as inspiration.) I'm crazy proud of you.
Yellow

Kris47

Hmm, I never knew that caffeine could be a catalyst to drink. did I get that right?

Yellow1111

I don't think it is for many. For me...yes.

Cow

K47, is more and more research coming out for this. Bottom line, it is a powerful stimulant drug. Lot of rehabs not even let you has caffeine anymore. In my case, is main trigger to create manic brain that want booze, just see Chapter I - Chapter XII of Diary of a Mad Cow if you wish to see someone in a vicious depression/caffeine/mania/booze, lather, rinse, repeat cycle.

Yellow, listen, is impossible to put our self in shoes of what someone else going though, especially in case such as Robby and Melissa. (Hi Ajax!) But, as the Dalai Lama very poignantly say, "Suffering expands to fit the space." During the last couple decade of my almost life long merry-go-round of addiction, the suffering has been truly horrifying and the loss incalculable. But to the outside world, it probable look like I was pretty much sitting on a couch for 20 years.

I has always aspired to achieve Robby's state of mind. And still do.

Yellow1111

Thank you, Cow. I was going to post some statistics on the caffeine /alcohol relation, but no time. Off to a big show.. So rarely go to these things, so will be a test. There is a line in Ally McBeal that says pretty much what you were conveying re: problems.
Xoxox
Yellow

courage2

Hi big bovine How's sobriety treating you? Isn't it a gas?

For any who still haven't committed to giving up their DOC, there's lots of giggles to be had on this side. Yeah, well, the first year pretty much sucks. Maybe year-point-five.

But once you're past that, and you realize you're a post-menopausal crone who wasted her youth aiming her resentments and fears like a loaded weapon at her own brain -- well then, any old flash of sunshine or bright-colored feathers is as good as a flame at the center of the universe.

PS to clarify: the post-menopausal crone bit was just me personally. Certainly wouldn't apply to anyone else on this thread.

puffy

Raccoon! I mentioned squirrel in honor of you and your friends. I wanted to spare your family.
Much Love and compassion,
Puffy

Yellow1111

Ok, I'm trying my hardest to stay away from tea, Cow. I'm thinking of you and if YOU managed, I better get it together. So, does this mean no green tea? No Yerba Mate? Maybe just kill me now. I'm on my way to gym, but I have no interest. Even listening to my favorite, Lord Huron, on the drive seems boring. We shall see!
Yellow

ardy

Hi Cow so gld to see your wit and ramblings once again.. missed you Dear Heart so much.. almost time for the Fair here in Wisconsin.. will hug a cow and think of you... good luck kiddo from the bottom of my heart I send prayers for your path to be a bit lighter.. hugs ardy

Kris47

Hmm, who knew? We all have our triggers. Mine was my insomnia until I figured out better to have only one problem, ( insomnia) instead of two, (alcohol and insomnia.) I have managed to cut down from a pot of bean juice to 2 cups only in the am. Still no sleepo.

Anyway, have a good day everyone and you my dear lehmeh.