tomsteve

One way to describe a social drinker would be to say that these are individuals who:

* Only drink occasionally.
* Do not feel the need to drink alcohol in order to have a good time.
* Never get into trouble because of alcohol.
* Don’t do or say things they regret while drinking.
* Do not spend a lot of time thinking about alcohol.
* Feel no need to control their intake. Such individuals never drink enough to worry about having to cut back.



Soooo, how bout ya start by stop lieing to yourself about this social drinking thing?

Social drinkers don't have social drinking screw things up badly for them.

Lenina

Dunk, is it possible to get some help? You're depressed and feeding that depression alcohol. I did that too. I can tell you using alcohol gets worse. It doesn't matter how long one is sober, it doesn't reset. alcohol will never work again.

I had to go inpatient to get meaningful help. I had to get a plan to stay sober and learn how to cope. It was important for me to be in a safe place for the 30 days it took to clear my head enough to be able to accept and act on getting my life in a better place.

For people like us, alcohol will never work again. It's does not bring relief. I have many nights I regretted drinking. I never regretted going impatient to get well.

Love from Lenina

Anna

There is lots of good advice in this thread for you.

Are you ready to accept that you can't control your drinking and that you need to make lifestyle changes to stay sober?

emilycrystal

[QUOTE=tomsteve;5462528]One way to describe a social drinker would be to say that these are individuals who:

* Only drink occasionally.
* Do not feel the need to drink alcohol in order to have a good time.
* Never get into trouble because of alcohol.
* Don’t do or say things they regret while drinking.
* Do not spend a lot of time thinking about alcohol.
* Feel no need to control their intake. Such individuals never drink enough to worry about having to cut back.

dunkelheit, I agree, look at this list and honestly assess yourself. I tried desperately for 12 years to "moderate". However nothing on that list ever applied to me. And now that i've been sober for a year I realized most people did not drink like me. They have a few and that's that. Being sober is difficult, I'm not going to lie, but trying to moderate was torture. And it always ended the same. In an agonizing hangover, not remembering what i did or said, panicking, checking my phone, checking my car (did I drive??), swearing to never do it again. It's just not worth it. Life is much better on this side. BUT i had to nix the whole "someday I will be able to control it" idea. Until I did that I kept relapsing.

NYCDoglvr

I remember how awful that feels. Alcoholism is progressive and if you con tinue drinking your life will continue to spiral down. When I got sober (1991) I realized I was powerless over alcohol: once I picked up a drink I had no control over how much I drank and what happened. How many years did I waste thinking "this time it will be different?" It never was but denial and rationalization rule the brains of alcoholics.

We have a choice: today I won't (or will) drink.

thomas11

Painfully true. Least nailed it.

TrixMixer

Well get used to being embarrassed and pissed at yourself. You have chosen the life of an alcoholic and passing out , vomiting, making a fool of yourself, hanging out with "New" friends (who I might add are just people who will overlook your pathetic behavior , because they are passed out right next to you)---It's a WONDERFUL isn't it?

You will continue on this path the rest of your life if you do not address your alcoholism today.
Now I say live your own life the way you want--I certainly did for 10 years trying to figure out how I kept waking up in different places, DUH!! Alcohol make us dumb---or just too dense to admit it is the alcohol, stupid! Yea, why do these things keep happening to me and I am so embarrassed I made such a bad impression on the other drunks at the party,LOL!

Honey, these are not your friends they are just other drunks who could bot care less about you! Get rid of them and the alcohol and see what a real LIFE is like, and stop fooling yourself.

Good Luck,
TrixMixer

PennyLane76

I don't know much, Day 5 here again and it is rough and am white knuckling today. I do know for years I drank socially , "predrank" a bit because of anxiety and thought it was manageable, then went down into a rabbit hole for years of becoming a secret at home large quantities of wine drinker, and to be honest, with clarity of last day or two, I see the social drinking I was doing wasn't manageable either. I would look forward to the drink more than being with friends. I lost, hobbies, joy in life, had injuries while drunk... which is where you are heading. A newcomers Class might help on newcomers forum when you decide to give it a go.

zerothehero

There is fun after alcohol. It took me a few months of sobriety to believe it, but now I feel like I have more fun sober than when I was drinking. Real fun. Fun I can remember.

fini

Dunkelheit,
it's not about excessive drinking. it's about this:

I can't stop. I have no self control.

those are your words; that's your truth.
and from there, there's only one sane way to go.

PurpleKnight

Might be time to stop going out for a while, you don't have to go, Sobreity is all about decisions, what activities to get involved in and what people to hang out with.

For me I could never have become Sober by simply continuing on with my same lifestyle of parties, bars etc etc, something needed to change!!

HereIAm321

Poison in your body.

Cirrhosis.

Do you know what happens to each of your body's organ systems when your liver is compromised? When your liver starts to shut down?

No one thinks it will happen to them, but it does.

A life cut short by this socially encouraged morass of asshat-ery!

There's nothing redeeming about alcohol. And I can say that, even knowing that my addictive voice still whispers to me on occasion.

Because all I have to do is look at my partner and see the devastation it has wreaked in his life. In the lives of his young children.

Even though he stopped drinking the moment he was diagnosed 3 years ago...he can't undo what he's done. What's done is done.

A life filled with regrets. In his 40s. Looks 60. Sorrow. Blinding searing physical ANGUISH as his body is slowly dying. Watching that happen...well, I just gotta say, that Least is right - I hope you make it out alive.

Before it's too late.

The worst part is...you won't know it's too late, until it IS too late.....

sobriiestote

I ruined many parties, was the token drunk, falling over, hurting myself, always going too far, waking up in strange places, no recollection of the end of the evening.

I don't go out much anymore but I still drink till blackout on the sofa at home.

I'm starting a process of recovery after 25 years of out of control drinking.

Recommend you nip it in the bud if you're still in early days, it's not worth it.

Crossfitdad

Maybe I'm off base, but that seems like a pretty harsh diagnosis. I don't know how young the OP is, but many younger folks tend to drink to black out and there is a learning/experiment element to it. In my day, we called them partiers. It's not a good thing, but to say someone is an alcoholic because they drank too much is a bit harsh.

I think the OPs problem is definitely dangerous and needs to be addressed. Bad things can only happen when one drinks to such excess.

I can identify with the situation. You get a beer in you and you want another to have fun. But by the fifth or sixth, your inhibitions are gone and at that point you can't or don't think about the consequences.

I think the OP needs to recognize that he/she has a potential problem and needs to be more responsible.

doggonecarl

It's not Scott's diagnosis, the poster identifies herself as an alcoholic. This from her inital post:

I am a 24 year old, female, on and off again alcoholic of 5 years.

Taking her at her word, she's attempting something--moderate, social drinking--that isn't going to work.

WritingFromLife

I have all my journals, kept since 1992, when I was 24, ironically. That was the first year I thought I "drank too much"--very similar to what Dunk is going through. So I added "alcoholism" to my list of self-help topics to research at the Library (yes, no internet).

I found one of those ubiquitous tests that show the Stages of Alcoholism, in this case, 1 through 4, with about 10 questions to tick off under each category. At 24, I made it through the Stage 1 ticks, and assumed I was a problem drinker, no big deal, stop, moderate, whatever.

Over the next 15 years or so, I continued to drink and was definitely "High Functioning".....

But I also pulled that same test out that I copied that day in the library....about 4 times over those 15 years.....

Each time I reviewed it, I would check off further down the list, ie, further through the "stages".

PROGRESSION IS REAL.

Stop while you're ahead.

Hugs!

interruptedgirl

If you don't have an issue with alcohol the thought of stopping wouldn't be consuming your thoughts. You wouldn't even know this forum exists. The real challenge isn't in "controlling" your drinking, or "knowing your limit" etc., the REAL challenge is stopping and living a life without alcohol.

Love yourself enough to try.