JeffreyAK

I used to go to a lot of motorcycle racetrack riding schools, where you learn and practice high-speed roadracing techniques, and one in Las Vegas was excellent. Racers crash often, and novice racers almost always blame the tires - the standard explanation is, "I have no idea what happened, the tire just slipped and I crashed! These tires are junk!" If you crashed at this school and came back with that explanation, you got sent to the back of the class and they wouldn't let you ride anymore until you came up with a better explanation. The idea was, it's never the tires, it's what you the rider did before the moment when you caused the tire to slip. So if you couldn't self-analyze the whole situation and learn from it so it was less likely to happen again, they didn't want to risk putting you back out there so you can crash again and maybe take someone else with you.

I think relapses are a bit like this. The learning can be real and can make you stronger, but we're obligated to dig deeper and understand what led up to what genuinely seemed like an out-of-the-blue action.

Glad you're back and learned from it!

Wholesome

?? I don't get this? Are you saying that today is 2 years for you but you are counting three days later because of detox?

polaris

Sorry about it...EVERYTIME Ive managed a stretch of sobriety and thought that maybe Im just overreacting and I can afford a night off...it always throws me right back into the hell I was attempting to dig my way out of. Thats Alcoholism. Its hard to accept that we CANNOT outsmart it, but that is the reality.

Easyvictor

I also strongly agree with this. You will always have those years to be proud of and they are proof that you CAN do this. Without a program to follow, I wouldn't last 2 days without a drink. Obviously you were doing something or working a program that was effective. I would honestly go back to it (just my opinion) but at the same time really going over where, in that moment of weakness how did you succumb to that chilled bottle. Had you stopped working your recovery in the days or weeks leading up to it? Best of luck. I am on Day 2 after a relapse so we are both starting anew.

BirdOnWire

Oh my goodness, sobriety is worth it. There is just a renewed lightness and happiness to my days. Thanks again all, for getting me through that. I just could not have gone back to that dark life of always feeling sick (hangovers), buying "enough" at the liquor store, missing work, and the emotional roller coaster of just being drunk.

Soberwolf

Congrats BOW

Hevyn

Very happy to hear that Bird.