pregnant. alcoholic. struggling.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4
pregnant. alcoholic. struggling.
I am 18 weeks. I've been abstaining. However I've been having considerable stress due to dead beat dad leaving me and baby on board high and dry and broke. I'm high risk and on restricted activity. Nightmares every day about not having money or what I need for baby.
Then the migraines started.
I want to drink so bad.
I hate myself so much. I don't want to hurt this innocent baby.
I drank vanilla extract after a 30 minute panic attack earlier. Who even does that? I had to stop my antidepressants and antianxiety meds and I'm up crap creek without a paddle and there's a hole in that canoe.
Advice. Please.
I am the worst person alive I know, so please don't make me feel worse about it. I'm new here yeah came here looking for help.
Then the migraines started.
I want to drink so bad.
I hate myself so much. I don't want to hurt this innocent baby.
I drank vanilla extract after a 30 minute panic attack earlier. Who even does that? I had to stop my antidepressants and antianxiety meds and I'm up crap creek without a paddle and there's a hole in that canoe.
Advice. Please.
I am the worst person alive I know, so please don't make me feel worse about it. I'm new here yeah came here looking for help.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,366
Hi and welcome PprStSoapCo 
I'm sorry for what must be a very anxious time, but you'll find a lot of wisdom, understanding and support here - you needn't do this alone any more.
I'm not in the US but there must be charitable organisations there than help you get the things you need and help to get the needs you need?
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get some advice there?
Free/Low-Cost/Sliding-Scale Clinics - NeedyMeds
Call 2-1-1
Noone here is going to give you a hard time - you know as well as we do how important your baby-to-be's health is - please do take the advice you'll get here to heart.
We want to help
D
I'm sorry for what must be a very anxious time, but you'll find a lot of wisdom, understanding and support here - you needn't do this alone any more.
I'm not in the US but there must be charitable organisations there than help you get the things you need and help to get the needs you need?
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get some advice there?
Free/Low-Cost/Sliding-Scale Clinics - NeedyMeds
The 12499 clinics in this database are free, low cost, low cost with a sliding scale based on income, or offer some type of financial assistance.
2-1-1 provides free and confidential information and referral. Call 2-1-1 for help with food, housing, employment, health care, counseling and more. Learn more about your local 2-1-1 by looking it up here.
We want to help
D
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,332
Hi! Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry you are struggling right now. My sister has anxiety and was given a different medication for it during her pregnancies. Please talk to your doctor about your struggles.
If you are in the U.S. you should qualify for welfare, food stamps, Medicaid and WIC. Please apply. Also look into Catholic Charities they may be able to help.
I am glad you reached out. You aren't alone.
If you are in the U.S. you should qualify for welfare, food stamps, Medicaid and WIC. Please apply. Also look into Catholic Charities they may be able to help.
I am glad you reached out. You aren't alone.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by happybeingme 
Hi! Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry you are struggling right now. My sister has anxiety and was given a different medication for it during her pregnancies. Please talk to your doctor about your struggles.
If you are in the U.S. you should qualify for welfare, food stamps, Medicaid and WIC. Please apply. Also look into Catholic Charities they may be able to help.
I am glad you reached out. You aren't alone.
If you are in the U.S. you should qualify for welfare, food stamps, Medicaid and WIC. Please apply. Also look into Catholic Charities they may be able to help.
I am glad you reached out. You aren't alone.
Thank you for your reply
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hi and welcome PprStSoapCo
I'm sorry for what must be a very anxious time, but you'll find a lot of wisdom, understanding and support here - you needn't do this alone any more.
I'm not in the US but there must be charitable organisations there than help you get the things you need and help to get the needs you need?
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get som
Noone here is going to give you a hard time - you know as well as we do how important your baby-to-be's health is - please do take the advice you'll get here to heart.
We want to help
D
I'm sorry for what must be a very anxious time, but you'll find a lot of wisdom, understanding and support here - you needn't do this alone any more.
I'm not in the US but there must be charitable organisations there than help you get the things you need and help to get the needs you need?
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get som
Noone here is going to give you a hard time - you know as well as we do how important your baby-to-be's health is - please do take the advice you'll get here to heart.
We want to help
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,366
Despite my name, I'm a guy so I haven't been in your position exactly ...I have had to deal with cravings tho and there are some really good tips here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
Like I said before, this is a great place for wisdom and support - you're not alone any more
D
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
Like I said before, this is a great place for wisdom and support - you're not alone any more
D
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,332
I must be honest I don't recall the change. It was something like zanax to zoloft or vice versa. Also it might seem silly but deep breathing exercises can be a huge help.
Don't drink the mouthwash that is very dangerous for both of you.
Don't drink the mouthwash that is very dangerous for both of you.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 397
I had a hard pregnancy too. My son is 2.5 months old and is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Keep your eye on the prize I too am an alcoholic and struggle constantly. I was put on Prozac during pregnancy. Like another poster said, talk to your doctor and tell them what you are going through. Best wishes. It is all so worth it
I too am an alcoholic and struggle constantly. I was put on Prozac during pregnancy. Like another poster said, talk to your doctor and tell them what you are going through. Best wishes. It is all so worth it Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Hi Ppr welcome to the forum.
I'm an alcoholic too and I sobered up for both of my pregnancies. It is what has to happen, we only get one shot at making a healthy baby. If you are eyeballing the mouthwash maybe it has to be removed from the house?
Loneliness and money issues are tough to deal with but I think reaching out to whatever social systems you can is a good start. What about family? Is there anyone who could help you?
I know a few women who still took antidepressants while pregnant so talking to your doc about that is good advice.
Hope you stick around on here with us This is a great place for support and wisdom.
Be well and congrats on having a new baby on the way. When I had my first I finally knew what true love was!
I'm an alcoholic too and I sobered up for both of my pregnancies. It is what has to happen, we only get one shot at making a healthy baby. If you are eyeballing the mouthwash maybe it has to be removed from the house?
Loneliness and money issues are tough to deal with but I think reaching out to whatever social systems you can is a good start. What about family? Is there anyone who could help you?
I know a few women who still took antidepressants while pregnant so talking to your doc about that is good advice.
Hope you stick around on here with us
This is a great place for support and wisdom.Be well and congrats on having a new baby on the way. When I had my first I finally knew what true love was!
Grateful
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: San Luis Obispo, California
Posts: 17
I took Lexepro (anti depressant) during both of my pregnancies. My OB said it was better taking Lexepro than possibly relapsing.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I drank 12 weeks (first trimester) of my first pregnancy. My son now has mild/moderate fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS). I just told my story in another thread if you want to look it up. Anyway, I took Lexepro with both my pregnancies and my daughter (whom I didn't drink with) is totally fine. She's now 3.
I will tell you this....the pain and anxiety and "work" that you'll have with an FAS child, is nothing compared to not drinking for 40 weeks. I know it is very hard to "go dry." However, think about having this stress your WHOLE LIFE?!?! I wish so bad I wouldn't have drank during the first trimester. Our daily struggles with our now 4 year old son with FAS are such a struggle for our family. We run him all over town all week for special ed and therapy. He will never be in a "regular" classroom. He will probably live with us his whole life. I fear what will happen when my husband and I die. Who will take care of him?
My first 6 months of sobriety I took Antabuse. This pill makes you violently ill if you drink. Luckily I never drank on it, so I didn't experience the illness but I've heard it's very bad. It also builds up in your system, so even if you choose to binge drink one day, you'd have to plan it out several days prior to allow the med to leave your system. For me, I wasn't going to plan out a relapse (if I did relapse). It would rather be a spontaneous thing due to stress, etc. The possible "damage" to your baby from taking meds will be WAY less than drinking.
You can't do this alone. No one gets sober by herself. Force yourself to go to a women's AA meeting daily. You may be surprised as to how many women share your same story. I wish so bad I would've taken this advice and not drank during my pregnancy. I have to live with this for the rest of my life--12 weeks of my life (first trimester) have altered my life, and someone else's (my son) forever. What a shame. I'm such an A-hole
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I drank 12 weeks (first trimester) of my first pregnancy. My son now has mild/moderate fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS). I just told my story in another thread if you want to look it up. Anyway, I took Lexepro with both my pregnancies and my daughter (whom I didn't drink with) is totally fine. She's now 3.
I will tell you this....the pain and anxiety and "work" that you'll have with an FAS child, is nothing compared to not drinking for 40 weeks. I know it is very hard to "go dry." However, think about having this stress your WHOLE LIFE?!?! I wish so bad I wouldn't have drank during the first trimester. Our daily struggles with our now 4 year old son with FAS are such a struggle for our family. We run him all over town all week for special ed and therapy. He will never be in a "regular" classroom. He will probably live with us his whole life. I fear what will happen when my husband and I die. Who will take care of him?
My first 6 months of sobriety I took Antabuse. This pill makes you violently ill if you drink. Luckily I never drank on it, so I didn't experience the illness but I've heard it's very bad. It also builds up in your system, so even if you choose to binge drink one day, you'd have to plan it out several days prior to allow the med to leave your system. For me, I wasn't going to plan out a relapse (if I did relapse). It would rather be a spontaneous thing due to stress, etc. The possible "damage" to your baby from taking meds will be WAY less than drinking.
You can't do this alone. No one gets sober by herself. Force yourself to go to a women's AA meeting daily. You may be surprised as to how many women share your same story. I wish so bad I would've taken this advice and not drank during my pregnancy. I have to live with this for the rest of my life--12 weeks of my life (first trimester) have altered my life, and someone else's (my son) forever. What a shame. I'm such an A-hole
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
I am the worst person alive I know, so please don't make me feel worse about it.
How can I buy all this stuff for baby? If I'm still this out of whack will I even be a good mother? I'm crying again just writing this. End of my wits. D;
These things will work out. Dead Beat Dad walking out could be the best thing to happen to you.
Quiting drinking alone will help ease up the anxiety in time and the panic. As for meds talk to your doctor see what they can do etc..
Going for walks helps as well. and have some hope. these things have a way of working out. I know a girl who was pregnant an alcoholic and no money etc.. things came together for her she had the baby people helped out she was givne money and was able to get a car etc.. and last I checked she was still sober. This stuff does work out every day it doesnt have to be so scary.
But try to keep your thoughts present. remember these thoughts of worry and emotions of fear etc.. thats all they are is thoughts and emotions let them come and go. If you latch on to them you will feel worse.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Hang in there. There is a bunch of support out there. I stayed on Zoloft for my entire pregnancy with my second child because I didn't take it with my first and had post lartum depression. Talk to your doctor. About all of your worries about providing, too. I'm sure you aren't the only mother your doctor has seen and they may have resources to refer you too.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
Hi, I'm sorry you're feeling so down right now.
First of all, I am so glad you know you must remain sober for the health of your baby. But, it may be possible to talk with your dr about taking a different antidepressant that is safe during pregnancy?
Since you are in the US, I know that the Salvation Army has thrift stores in many cities where you could probably find many items you need for your baby as well as clothing for the baby. Here is a link for Salvation Army thrift stores in Mississippi:
http://salvationarmyalm.org/store-locations/
Check with charitable organizations in your city like United Way and Red Cross and see if you can find help there. Also, garage sales are common at this time of the year and people are often getting rid of baby things so that could be a option too.
I think it's important that you keep very close contact with your dr as you go off the medications. I wish you well with the birth of your child and I really hope that you continue to read and post and keep us updated.
First of all, I am so glad you know you must remain sober for the health of your baby. But, it may be possible to talk with your dr about taking a different antidepressant that is safe during pregnancy?
Since you are in the US, I know that the Salvation Army has thrift stores in many cities where you could probably find many items you need for your baby as well as clothing for the baby. Here is a link for Salvation Army thrift stores in Mississippi:
http://salvationarmyalm.org/store-locations/
Check with charitable organizations in your city like United Way and Red Cross and see if you can find help there. Also, garage sales are common at this time of the year and people are often getting rid of baby things so that could be a option too.
I think it's important that you keep very close contact with your dr as you go off the medications. I wish you well with the birth of your child and I really hope that you continue to read and post and keep us updated.
pray for strength
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New England
Posts: 2,414
Hi Pepperstreetsoap,
SR is super supportive. Please stick around.
Along with all the good stuff already written (and despite the migraine) give this number a call 800-721-7222 and get the resource/support ball rolling (Perinatal High Risk Management/High Risk Services System - Mississippi State Department of Health).
Mississippi Medicaid has a fantastic program geared just for Moms to-be like yourself. I promise you that there are much better options for you than being alone, suffering and staring at the mouthwash.
Remember that you are not alone in your situation. Most people in the high risk field are super supportive - I had to hang out by myself during my pregnancy and actually enjoyed the human contact. Try not to fear judgment. Right now is a great opportunity to make good decisions for yourself and your babe to-be.
Keep in touch!
SR is super supportive. Please stick around.
Along with all the good stuff already written (and despite the migraine) give this number a call 800-721-7222 and get the resource/support ball rolling (Perinatal High Risk Management/High Risk Services System - Mississippi State Department of Health).
Mississippi Medicaid has a fantastic program geared just for Moms to-be like yourself. I promise you that there are much better options for you than being alone, suffering and staring at the mouthwash.
Remember that you are not alone in your situation. Most people in the high risk field are super supportive - I had to hang out by myself during my pregnancy and actually enjoyed the human contact. Try not to fear judgment. Right now is a great opportunity to make good decisions for yourself and your babe to-be.
Keep in touch!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Houston Texas
Posts: 21
I would definitely discuss the depression with your doctor. My sister was on low dose celexa her whole pregnancy and 1 year after while she breast fed, and my niece is 9 years old now and completely healthy. There are risks associated with antidepressants but there are also definitely risks that untreated depression has on a developing fetus especially if you are thinking about drinking. Please talk to your doctor about this, and be firm. My sister had to be adamant that her feelings were not just normal pregnancy hormones.
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