Crystalina

I had almost 5 days clean...

I'm s teacher and today was the last day of school so I picked up a bottle of wine.
Mu drank the whole thing in a hour and a half before my husband came home.

I wish I had never married him. He's been unemployed for almost 4 months, doesn't help around the house and has zero sex drive.

I edu I could figure out how to leave him. I'm 40 years old and wasted my best years on this *******.

I'm American but stuck living with him in Canada.
If I had the guts I'd off myself.

Coldfusion

Welcome, Crystalina! I'm sorry you find yourself in a difficult situation. But alcohol never helps anything. I hope you are finished with drinking!

Dee74

Hi Crystalina - welcome

I'm sorry for your pain.

I found some time away from drinking actually helped me a lot. It gave me a clear mind, and I stopped feeling the utter despair I thought was simply part of my life.

After a few months sober I was a lot more capable of making those big lifestyle decisions.

You'll find a lot of support here. Read around and post as much as you like

If you feel you're so low you might harm yourself, there are a lot of reading and links here - please do check them out:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ease-read.html

D

fini

welcome, Crystalina.

sounds like you've got a bunch of dissatisfactions on your plate.
if you were to quit drinking, your options of what to do about them would increase.
it's good to see you here, engaging with others.
don't give up!

Sasha4

Drinking at 'someone' never works.
It only hurts you.
Better ways to deal with issues like that.
If you have no kids, what is stopping you from leaving?

Delilah1

Hello and Welcome,

I am sorry you are having such a tough time. Lots of great advice above. Do you have family and friends close?

Will you be off all summer? Have you planned some things for you?