Out of my mind on Monday moanin'
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 2,459
Out of my mind on Monday moanin'
Good morning all -
Again, thank you for your love, concern and support.
You are right... I used alcohol for the effect of the drug and justified it by saying I was sad, upset, whatever. I have a million reasons to drink and not one of them is valid.
I am just going to say something here for a bit of context. I was sent a notice of foreclosure on Friday. My mortgage company is messed up and this is a mistake. However, I need to hire an attorney to sort it out quickly or else I may lose my house on July 7th.
So...I am under a lot of stress. Not that it justifies drinking.
It is a process... I am more sober than not these days which is a huge improvement from when I started last August. Still trying and learning as I go along. I remind myself that when I tried to quit smoking years ago that it took at least 11-12 attempts before I was able to completely stop. I had smoked for 20 years and was able to do it. So, I think I will be able to do this too. With patience.
Thank you for believing in me.
Again, thank you for your love, concern and support.
You are right... I used alcohol for the effect of the drug and justified it by saying I was sad, upset, whatever. I have a million reasons to drink and not one of them is valid.
I am just going to say something here for a bit of context. I was sent a notice of foreclosure on Friday. My mortgage company is messed up and this is a mistake. However, I need to hire an attorney to sort it out quickly or else I may lose my house on July 7th.
So...I am under a lot of stress. Not that it justifies drinking.
It is a process... I am more sober than not these days which is a huge improvement from when I started last August. Still trying and learning as I go along. I remind myself that when I tried to quit smoking years ago that it took at least 11-12 attempts before I was able to completely stop. I had smoked for 20 years and was able to do it. So, I think I will be able to do this too. With patience.
Thank you for believing in me.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Good luck with getting the foreclosure sorted out. I used to work for a mortgage company and it seems like you could simply bring proof of payment to the company (or via email) and they would change their records.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Good morning ArtFriend.
Great to see you being responsible for yourself by taking ownership for your past drinking. Sorry to hear about all the stressors which doesn't make anything easier of course. You're on the right path to achieve a lasting sobriety. Its difficult early into it. It won't always be difficult though. And I'm more than happy to believe in YOU!!
Great to see you being responsible for yourself by taking ownership for your past drinking. Sorry to hear about all the stressors which doesn't make anything easier of course. You're on the right path to achieve a lasting sobriety. Its difficult early into it. It won't always be difficult though. And I'm more than happy to believe in YOU!!
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Keep at it AF. Unlike a lot of things in our lives, sobriety is something we CAN have regardless of our particular circumstances. Other people can make mistakes that affect many areas of our lives, and certain situations are beyond our control. But that's not true for sobriety....we have 100% say in how we go about it and what the results are. It's also important to view and accept alcoholism for what it is....a unique and separate issue that needs to be address as such. How we address is it is an individual choice, but we must have a plan.
Pressure makes diamonds
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 521
Hi Artfriend,
I'm glad you posted. I hope that the foreclosure gets sorted out quickly, I'm sure that is very stressful. I found that when I was drinking, anything happening in my life was magnified x 100 due to withdrawals, alcohol related anxiety etc.
I hope that you can get some sober days so that you start feeling better. I'm glad you posted instead of letting this turn into a binge.
I'm rooting for you!
I'm glad you posted. I hope that the foreclosure gets sorted out quickly, I'm sure that is very stressful. I found that when I was drinking, anything happening in my life was magnified x 100 due to withdrawals, alcohol related anxiety etc.
I hope that you can get some sober days so that you start feeling better. I'm glad you posted instead of letting this turn into a binge.
I'm rooting for you!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Oh shoot. I mean, dear AF, if this was a mistake on the part of the mortgage company, there should be a way to fix it and not make you responsible for an error, let alone lose your house?!
I never experienced anything similar, but what I did once was a gigantic chain or errors in the banking system that takes care (well, it did back then) of a business I started in my late teens with my father in Europe and have continued ever since, including remotely when I moved out of that country, via a bunch of employees. The sh*tshow was ~12 years ago, and I seriously thought I would end up in bankruptcy for a little while. Without getting into details, the errors were cleared and fixed pretty quickly, but it for sure gave me panic attacks. I did not even tell my dad (who was my partner) because I was the one taking care of all internet stuff... I have not thought about this for a long time, your post now just triggered a recall, and I still feel anxious even at the memory. It was before I started drinking heavily, so can't say how it would have affected my alcoholism.
You see, here is a very good reason for you to stay sober now, to sort out this stuff. It's not a very good idea to deal with these kinds of things intoxicated or badly hangover, it makes our decision making really suffer.
Other than these, of course we drink for the effect. That was the reason why we started to abuse alcohol, became addicted, and also why it's so hard to quit. My suggestion in this context is in line with Scott's: I really think you should make a recovery plan for yourself, maybe initially with a day-to-day break down. I did that when I quit, and I think looking at my plan helped me a great deal every day. I generally benefit a lot from visual cues and visual information, so I made flow charts and files filled with pages and pages of information and planning organized in ways that were easier for me to digest and use every single day when I opened my files in the mornings, while having my coffee. This was just me of course, you will have your own ways and can find what works for you. I found the planning absolutely essential not only to stay sober but simply just to get through every day in early sobriety.
If planning like that does not work for you (it would not mean anything special, simply just that your perception style, information processing, and motivational structures are different), I would recommend maybe getting external help that could aid the maintenance of your sobriety on a daily basis. You clearly are great at seeking help and sharing whatever openly... so I'm thinking perhaps a bit more that here on SR?
In any case, I sympathize and admire you for all the clearly hard efforts you make here to keep the ball rolling
I never experienced anything similar, but what I did once was a gigantic chain or errors in the banking system that takes care (well, it did back then) of a business I started in my late teens with my father in Europe and have continued ever since, including remotely when I moved out of that country, via a bunch of employees. The sh*tshow was ~12 years ago, and I seriously thought I would end up in bankruptcy for a little while. Without getting into details, the errors were cleared and fixed pretty quickly, but it for sure gave me panic attacks. I did not even tell my dad (who was my partner) because I was the one taking care of all internet stuff... I have not thought about this for a long time, your post now just triggered a recall, and I still feel anxious even at the memory. It was before I started drinking heavily, so can't say how it would have affected my alcoholism.
You see, here is a very good reason for you to stay sober now, to sort out this stuff. It's not a very good idea to deal with these kinds of things intoxicated or badly hangover, it makes our decision making really suffer.
Other than these, of course we drink for the effect. That was the reason why we started to abuse alcohol, became addicted, and also why it's so hard to quit. My suggestion in this context is in line with Scott's: I really think you should make a recovery plan for yourself, maybe initially with a day-to-day break down. I did that when I quit, and I think looking at my plan helped me a great deal every day. I generally benefit a lot from visual cues and visual information, so I made flow charts and files filled with pages and pages of information and planning organized in ways that were easier for me to digest and use every single day when I opened my files in the mornings, while having my coffee. This was just me of course, you will have your own ways and can find what works for you. I found the planning absolutely essential not only to stay sober but simply just to get through every day in early sobriety.
If planning like that does not work for you (it would not mean anything special, simply just that your perception style, information processing, and motivational structures are different), I would recommend maybe getting external help that could aid the maintenance of your sobriety on a daily basis. You clearly are great at seeking help and sharing whatever openly... so I'm thinking perhaps a bit more that here on SR?
In any case, I sympathize and admire you for all the clearly hard efforts you make here to keep the ball rolling
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 273
It's actually situations like this you most want to be sober. You don't want to put yourself at a disadvantage trying to sort things out. Never mind the part where you're being inconvenienced.
Not sure if hiring an attorney is the first thing you need to do. Maybe call the mortgage company?
Not sure if hiring an attorney is the first thing you need to do. Maybe call the mortgage company?
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
In sobriety I have found my mortgage company, credit card billers, utilities, insurance companies are much more reasonable to deal with. Thank goodness Of course I now deal with issues more timely and am not living in daily fear of going to the mailbox - well, maybe a little.........
A lot of things for me are starting to getting a little easier starting in year two of sobriety. Financial issues are but one of the benefits for certain!
Glad your here on SR AF> It be hard not to see your avatar daily
Of course I now deal with issues more timely and am not living in daily fear of going to the mailbox - well, maybe a little.........A lot of things for me are starting to getting a little easier starting in year two of sobriety. Financial issues are but one of the benefits for certain!
Glad your here on SR AF> It be hard not to see your avatar daily
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Che 
It's actually situations like this you most want to be sober. You don't want to put yourself at a disadvantage trying to sort things out. Never mind the part where you're being inconvenienced.
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