countrygirl2014

Now that I am seriously working a program, I am identifying problems in my sober life that are driving me nuts. Lack of motivation and disorganization. I have always been organized, clean and my house orderly. Since being sober, it's like someone pulled the stitches out of an overstuffed child's toy. Everything lays everywhere! I'm all over the place. I was told that's because your mind was a mess, your physical world had to be orderly. Now my mind is coming back together, your house is neglected. What's this about? I can't seem to clean my house and my mind at the same time. My sponsor has me making my bed everyday. That is a start. I plan on cleaning the house top to bottom today for a fresh start. Any other suggestions? I feel like a lazy dirtbag, lol.

Jennifer

sugarbear1

one small area at a time.

I used to be super organized, today, I'm learning how to do it sober!

countrygirl2014

It blows my mind I have to basically relearn how to clean. This is something I have done since I was little and now I can't do it. Just a reminder of what a mess I became.

Jennifer

Windancer

Oh, how I can relate to this!
I feel exactly the same way right now.
I can't believe I got so sloppy. The sober me is tidy and organized.
Sometimes I get overwhelmed because I have so much catching up to do.

fini

Jennifer,
something along that vein happened with me, too, but not to the extreme of sloppiness or disorganization.
but yes, when i was drinking all those decades, my house was spotless. everything organized. rigid and under control. and i understood that on some level this was a kind of denial about really having control, while stamping control all over my external situation.
now, sober, it's evolved into a more relaxed state. i do not rigidly clean the place top to bottom every saturday anymore ; far from it.
i can go to bed with a few dishes in the sink. i don't care if the laundry isn't folded the minute it comes out of the dryer.
no, i haven't turned out to be a slob, but i do think there's a lot of truth in the
I was told that's because your mind was a mess, your physical world had to be orderly. for me.

and you'll likely come to some new balance for yourself; a place where internal and external are neither a mess nor rigidly ordered.

Fly N Buy

When we remove the alcohol from alcoholic we find the ick!!! Good job on working your program and starting your journey

Great advice from Sugar......small bites are best. Don't get overwhelmed and exhausted. Maybe start with a room or a task..........

When I drank I could accomplish amazing things! Let's re wallpaper the dining room NOW!!! Insane and maniacal behavior. For me I think completion of projects was proof I wasn't a drunk. Who could do all this and have a problem?? Wow.......

Thanks for the post!
Keep coming back

learningagain

I am experiencing similar, at least I did for around 4-5 days. I would sit around, then have a couple of beers and suddenly clean - I think I was trying to prove to myself that I was still capable, despite my drinking. Now, I have a to do list I have written and allow myself to pick chores to do - my main task is sobriety, so I have said to myself, if all I do this month is NOT drink, then that is all I need to do. However, I am now catching up on tasks around the place, and I enjoy the feeling of crossing something off my to do list . Maybe I am just weird that way!

biminiblue

Alcoholic mania. I almost miss that. Not.


Have you ever visited the flylady.net site? She's a genius for one day at a time house cleaning and organizing systems. That's how I whipped my place into shape years ago.

MIRecovery

Nobody has died from a dirty house. Millions have died from alcoholism. Any day you are sober you have been a success. The pieces of the puzzle will fall back into place just give yourself some time

Anna

You started the thread with the word balance. To me, balance is the key to recovery. I always tended to overdo everything, including keeping the house clean and tidy. I still do that, but I can step away and do other things as well.

countrygirl2014

The house is clean!!!! Top to bottom. Now I can break down housecleaning into smaller pieces a and do this. I needed that clean slate. Ahhhhh what a relief.

Jennifer

zjw

I had some bad filthy habits when i drank and smoked. I blamed my drunken lazy state for it. Too drunk to care to out of energy from all the smokes etc.. Thats why i'm a pig i'd think.

Then i quit smoking sobered up. I'm still a pig!!! I guess i'm just lazy about certain things. Run 15 miles? ok! pick up that pile of clothes? meh nah.

So somethings got better for me when i got sober other things just stayed the same. I am who I am at least I have a better idea of who that is now i think...

Soberwolf

Way to go Jennifer

lighter

I found that setting the timer to fifteen / thirty minutes on my mobile phone then cleaning until the alarm helped me a lot.

Put away 20 items before each meal also helped.

countrygirl2014

Those are great suggestions. Thanks

Jennifer

totfit

At my worst my home and car may have been their cleanest. I had to have everything just right so that I felt my life was not out of control. I made things appear ok. Once I actually became "ok", then I did not try so hard to look the part and some of the other things became a bit more disordered. I felt "ok" so I did not put as much effort into looking the part. And.............I am ok with that.

Che

Sounds like psychobabble

Probably you got used to do things while drunk. Since you have low impulse control while drunk, as soon as you think of something it's easy to start doing it (including things you shouldn't do, but sometimes things you should do as well).

Just replace the alcohol with music or something, so that doing the chores isn't totally boring.

Ruby2

Now I understand better.

My house was a horrible mess when I was drinking. It still is chaotic shambles. I pretend it's artistic license. So long as I have messy children, I'm going to have to accept that. I agree with small bites. A little at a time. So much less overwhelming.

Dharma33

Bimini-

I love FlyLady!!! I have her calendar and scrubby things.

least

Years ago when I had little kids in the house, it was always spotless. (except the play room) Now my house is sloppy but my car is spotless. I'm just not as fussy as I used to be and that's ok with me. As long as my car is clean I'm alright.