Why one drink derails the healing process? PAWS
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Had Friday-itis today, compounded by the boss's absence, which it like a little vacation for us, too. So I plodded around SR for a little bit this afternoon, just before the big boss came through and told us all to get out early and enjoy the day.
By then, I'd read this thread and was moved nearly to tears by how -- yet again -- people who couldn't pick one another out of a crowd will give time and consideration to share the most intimate, insightful thoughts. By the time I came to Melinda's first post, I took out my ear-buds to give it my full attention. Jeffrey's contribution: spot on. MIR's poignant use of metaphor. So much given, again, from an unseen friend who has lost so much. And EndGame? The second post has now supplanted David Carr's observations about relapse as the smartest I've ever read.
I live in a place that can be very cold for a long time. Yes, it has it's Currier & Ives moments, but it takes its toll. Sometimes, it's so cold that breathing hurts; driving is often a hair-rising survival exercise. Today, though, I had to walk about 15 minutes to pick up my car from an oil change, starting in a park-like setting and then coursing through a pretty residential neighborhood.
Right now, we've reached the splendid moment where green explodes and while it will stay like this for months, it's never as beautiful as it is in this snapshot of transformation. The trees are wide awake. I passed every shade of lilac -- oh, they were fragrant. The earliest of the azaleas are opening, including one fully blossomed coral-colored bush, a variety I've never seen before. Peonies, one of my favorites, have begun to bloom. The first deep-purple irises lined the sidewalk in front of one home.
I don't think I'd usually be thought of as a mushy person. But today, for that entire 15 minutes, you were all on my mind. I kept hoping the people who gave so much in this thread can experience today -- somehow, somewhere -- the same beauty and peace found on my walk.
By then, I'd read this thread and was moved nearly to tears by how -- yet again -- people who couldn't pick one another out of a crowd will give time and consideration to share the most intimate, insightful thoughts. By the time I came to Melinda's first post, I took out my ear-buds to give it my full attention. Jeffrey's contribution: spot on. MIR's poignant use of metaphor. So much given, again, from an unseen friend who has lost so much. And EndGame? The second post has now supplanted David Carr's observations about relapse as the smartest I've ever read.
I live in a place that can be very cold for a long time. Yes, it has it's Currier & Ives moments, but it takes its toll. Sometimes, it's so cold that breathing hurts; driving is often a hair-rising survival exercise. Today, though, I had to walk about 15 minutes to pick up my car from an oil change, starting in a park-like setting and then coursing through a pretty residential neighborhood.
Right now, we've reached the splendid moment where green explodes and while it will stay like this for months, it's never as beautiful as it is in this snapshot of transformation. The trees are wide awake. I passed every shade of lilac -- oh, they were fragrant. The earliest of the azaleas are opening, including one fully blossomed coral-colored bush, a variety I've never seen before. Peonies, one of my favorites, have begun to bloom. The first deep-purple irises lined the sidewalk in front of one home.
I don't think I'd usually be thought of as a mushy person. But today, for that entire 15 minutes, you were all on my mind. I kept hoping the people who gave so much in this thread can experience today -- somehow, somewhere -- the same beauty and peace found on my walk.
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
Originally Posted by Venecia 
Had Friday-itis today, compounded by the boss's absence, which it like a little vacation for us, too. So I plodded around SR for a little bit this afternoon, just before the big boss came through and told us all to get out early and enjoy the day.
By then, I'd read this thread and was moved nearly to tears by how -- yet again -- people who couldn't pick one another out of a crowd will give time and consideration to share the most intimate, insightful thoughts. By the time I came to Melinda's first post, I took out my ear-buds to give it my full attention. Jeffrey's contribution: spot on. MIR's poignant use of metaphor. So much given, again, from an unseen friend who has lost so much. And EndGame? The second post has now supplanted David Carr's observations about relapse as the smartest I've ever read.
I live in a place that can be very cold for a long time. Yes, it has it's Currier & Ives moments, but it takes its toll. Sometimes, it's so cold that breathing hurts; driving is often a hair-rising survival exercise. Today, though, I had to walk about 15 minutes to pick up my car from an oil change, starting in a park-like setting and then coursing through a pretty residential neighborhood.
Right now, we've reached the splendid moment where green explodes and while it will stay like this for months, it's never as beautiful as it is in this snapshot of transformation. The trees are wide awake. I passed every shade of lilac -- oh, they were fragrant. The earliest of the azaleas are opening, including one fully blossomed coral-colored bush, a variety I've never seen before. Peonies, one of my favorites, have begun to bloom. The first deep-purple irises lined the sidewalk in front of one home.
I don't think I'd usually be thought of as a mushy person. But today, for that entire 15 minutes, you were all on my mind. I kept hoping the people who gave so much in this thread can experience today -- somehow, somewhere -- the same beauty and peace found on my walk.
By then, I'd read this thread and was moved nearly to tears by how -- yet again -- people who couldn't pick one another out of a crowd will give time and consideration to share the most intimate, insightful thoughts. By the time I came to Melinda's first post, I took out my ear-buds to give it my full attention. Jeffrey's contribution: spot on. MIR's poignant use of metaphor. So much given, again, from an unseen friend who has lost so much. And EndGame? The second post has now supplanted David Carr's observations about relapse as the smartest I've ever read.
I live in a place that can be very cold for a long time. Yes, it has it's Currier & Ives moments, but it takes its toll. Sometimes, it's so cold that breathing hurts; driving is often a hair-rising survival exercise. Today, though, I had to walk about 15 minutes to pick up my car from an oil change, starting in a park-like setting and then coursing through a pretty residential neighborhood.
Right now, we've reached the splendid moment where green explodes and while it will stay like this for months, it's never as beautiful as it is in this snapshot of transformation. The trees are wide awake. I passed every shade of lilac -- oh, they were fragrant. The earliest of the azaleas are opening, including one fully blossomed coral-colored bush, a variety I've never seen before. Peonies, one of my favorites, have begun to bloom. The first deep-purple irises lined the sidewalk in front of one home.
I don't think I'd usually be thought of as a mushy person. But today, for that entire 15 minutes, you were all on my mind. I kept hoping the people who gave so much in this thread can experience today -- somehow, somewhere -- the same beauty and peace found on my walk.
I must have been feeling you because I was brought to tears today in Chicago for the very same reason. The maples and oak leaves have just exploded and the forest is lush and full of life again.
The colors are so vibrant, I have to rub my eyes every once in a while just to adjust to all the beauty.
Thanks for this magnificence. XO AO
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Verte and AO -- my wishes fulfilled. I enjoyed reading your posts so much.
(BTW, third 'graph, second sentence. Should have been its, not it's. I drive myself nuts when I catch my mistakes too late.)
(BTW, third 'graph, second sentence. Should have been its, not it's. I drive myself nuts when I catch my mistakes too late.)
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,945
I have 22 days if I had one drink and that's it I'd feel like I was breaking out in a rash. This happened to me when I drank two odouls flew to the liquor store. For the first couple weeks I didn't trust myself with money but now I can hold onto it and my credit card. So I have made progress towards the end of an alcoholics drinking career its not fun. But I can't recall how bad it was it talks about this in the big book. So I'm steadfast on staying spiritually fit but what about when I get bored at night that's when I'm in danger. Self examination contemplative meditation and prayer I found I have to carry with me all waking hours. If I get bored I read the Bible or the big book or anything spiritual interest in my beliefs and it helps. Gets my mind of me and on God which is my only defense against the first drink not steps sponsor meetings I've done a ton of that and still drank utter dependence on God the only way I can stay sober. 100 percent hopeless apart from Divine help. I want to be a recovered alcoholic not a normal drinker drinking 1 or 2 drinks seems stupid to me even at the very beginning of my drinking. I want peace of mind joy and a sense of purpose even most normys don't have that. But when people find recovery plan that works on mental physical and spiritual and stick to it they have that and that's what I want I don't want to be a dry drunk.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
Now this might sound a little crazy, because it probably is, but I read something a long time ago about why it is so easy for an alcoholic to go back to heavy drinking. I don't remember the details, but it has to do with the pleasure center of your brain. The more alcohol or drugs a person uses and the longer a person uses, the bigger and stronger this connection becomes. The bigger this connection becomes, the more alcohol or drugs is necessary to satisfy the pleasure center. Most people know about this.
Now, here's the real interesting part. According to what I read, when a person stops drinking, this connection weakens, but never really goes completely away. So, when someone picks up that first drink, it stimulates this connection. Kinda wakes it up. The pleasure center remembers this connection and wants to go back to where it was when the person was drinking heavily, as quickly as possible. The pleasure center is a pretty primitive part of the brain, and doesn't have anything to do with reasoning or rational thinking, so unfortunately, that part of the brain kicks in later when that person decides enough is enough again, and tries to quit again. That's why one drink is too many. Kinda makes sense when you think about it, I think. John
Now, here's the real interesting part. According to what I read, when a person stops drinking, this connection weakens, but never really goes completely away. So, when someone picks up that first drink, it stimulates this connection. Kinda wakes it up. The pleasure center remembers this connection and wants to go back to where it was when the person was drinking heavily, as quickly as possible. The pleasure center is a pretty primitive part of the brain, and doesn't have anything to do with reasoning or rational thinking, so unfortunately, that part of the brain kicks in later when that person decides enough is enough again, and tries to quit again. That's why one drink is too many. Kinda makes sense when you think about it, I think. John
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
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Beautiful post V! You're so eloquent. It makes me want to be there to immerse myself in it, haha.
2muchpain, I think you're dead on.. when we get sober, the brain starts rewiring, but those pathways remain susceptible to any alcohol we ingest. At least it explains my experience, having relapsed after periods of sobriety countless times.
On the other hand, I do feel, in my case at least, that I benefited from those periods of sobriety, and they slowly became longer. I learned that being sober wasn't so bad, and wanted more of it.
2muchpain, I think you're dead on.. when we get sober, the brain starts rewiring, but those pathways remain susceptible to any alcohol we ingest. At least it explains my experience, having relapsed after periods of sobriety countless times.
On the other hand, I do feel, in my case at least, that I benefited from those periods of sobriety, and they slowly became longer. I learned that being sober wasn't so bad, and wanted more of it.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
Originally Posted by advbike
Beautiful post V! You're so eloquent. It makes me want to be there to immerse myself in it, haha.
2muchpain, I think you're dead on.. when we get sober, the brain starts rewiring, but those pathways remain susceptible to any alcohol we ingest. At least it explains my experience, having relapsed after periods of sobriety countless times.
On the other hand, I do feel, in my case at least, that I benefited from those periods of sobriety, and they slowly became longer. I learned that being sober wasn't so bad, and wanted more of it.
2muchpain, I think you're dead on.. when we get sober, the brain starts rewiring, but those pathways remain susceptible to any alcohol we ingest. At least it explains my experience, having relapsed after periods of sobriety countless times.
On the other hand, I do feel, in my case at least, that I benefited from those periods of sobriety, and they slowly became longer. I learned that being sober wasn't so bad, and wanted more of it.
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Join Date: Jul 2021
Posts: 15
Paws and 3 beers
So I went 384 days without a beer. Not sure if fully recovered from paws after 13 months but recently after stressful call I had 3 beers.
I’ve tried to find information on effects on cns/brain chemistry. This whole back to zero doesn’t quite add up after brain neurology has definetly improved after 13 months.
most of the threads on this subject quickly go down the “once you drink it’s all downhill”. Don’t have any inclination to drink after those 3 beers…wasn’t really that great so question is from your brains standpoint, does 3 beers really undo all your healthy brain changes over 13 months?
I’ve tried to find information on effects on cns/brain chemistry. This whole back to zero doesn’t quite add up after brain neurology has definetly improved after 13 months.
most of the threads on this subject quickly go down the “once you drink it’s all downhill”. Don’t have any inclination to drink after those 3 beers…wasn’t really that great so question is from your brains standpoint, does 3 beers really undo all your healthy brain changes over 13 months?
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Originally Posted by EndGameNYC
Your brain and central nervous system are attacked, and eventually leveled by an alien invader, alcohol. You then putter along at a snail's space for months and years, unable to accelerate no matter how hard you try, which leads to a near-complete standstill.
You put down the drink -- the aliens are beaten off -- and then rebuilding begins. Your brain and CNS have become unfamiliar with functioning without these externally imposed restrictions. They go nuts in their efforts to rebuild, repair and restart. Your physiology and biology are now flying at the speed of light. PAWS ensues. The mad rush to make things as they were is too much for us, so we suffer the inevitable symptoms of repair and regrowth. Time is needed in order to do a good job, and the workers become restless, even despairing. Patience, now in very short supply, is needed.
Over time, we may think that it wasn't so bad living under the supression of the aliens. "At least I didn't have to go through all this suffering and do all this work...they did it for me. They also told me what to do, made me feel disgusted with myself, and took away everything dear to me in life, but I didn't have to worry about things like being happy."
So we invite the aliens back at a time when we're feverishly rebuilding. We slam the breaks on our progress while driving at one hundred miles per hour. And the devastation recurs, only this time, the work seems harder, and hope dims as we struggle to get back to the progress we achieved in the absence of alcohol. Each time the invaders return, we face an increasingly daunting task to rebuild, our enthusiasm tempered and our patience challenged in the extreme, while the damage only gets worse.
You put down the drink -- the aliens are beaten off -- and then rebuilding begins. Your brain and CNS have become unfamiliar with functioning without these externally imposed restrictions. They go nuts in their efforts to rebuild, repair and restart. Your physiology and biology are now flying at the speed of light. PAWS ensues. The mad rush to make things as they were is too much for us, so we suffer the inevitable symptoms of repair and regrowth. Time is needed in order to do a good job, and the workers become restless, even despairing. Patience, now in very short supply, is needed.
Over time, we may think that it wasn't so bad living under the supression of the aliens. "At least I didn't have to go through all this suffering and do all this work...they did it for me. They also told me what to do, made me feel disgusted with myself, and took away everything dear to me in life, but I didn't have to worry about things like being happy."
So we invite the aliens back at a time when we're feverishly rebuilding. We slam the breaks on our progress while driving at one hundred miles per hour. And the devastation recurs, only this time, the work seems harder, and hope dims as we struggle to get back to the progress we achieved in the absence of alcohol. Each time the invaders return, we face an increasingly daunting task to rebuild, our enthusiasm tempered and our patience challenged in the extreme, while the damage only gets worse.
This whole back to zero doesn’t quite add up after brain neurology has definetly improved after 13 months.
most of the threads on this subject quickly go down the “once you drink it’s all downhill”.
most of the threads on this subject quickly go down the “once you drink it’s all downhill”.
I don’t know exactly what happens to the brain after drinking again after a year, but I know what would happen to my mind.
I’d find the whole experience unsatisfactory…but somewhere? I’d hold on tight to the idea I drank 3 beers and nothing bad happened….
Quick or slow, fast or no, it always starts with that first drink.
D
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne Australia.
Posts: 3,748
I used to think AAs first drink disaster was a load of drivel; not any more.
It took me quite some decades to gain some sense the hard way.
Irrespective of what scientifically happens, something bad does happen.
In my case it was quite subtle and could lead to 'light drinking'
The seed had been sown and misery just one extra drink away.
It took me quite some decades to gain some sense the hard way.
Irrespective of what scientifically happens, something bad does happen.
In my case it was quite subtle and could lead to 'light drinking'
The seed had been sown and misery just one extra drink away.
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