Alcoholism and Control
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by amethyst05 
One more thought on the "powerless" issue.. again, letting go while also taking control seems contradictory but I still think we have more power over our own circumstances than many of us realize, and I think it's important how we view and define things collectively...
If I try to not-drink, I most certainly will drink (eventually). If I practice a whole new way of living, it will return to me a whole new way of thinking. One which is emancipated from thoughts and temptations of drinking (as well as not-drinking). That is what stops me from drinking. It has nothing to do with willpower, choices or assertiveness. Call it a paradox if you want. I call it "recovered".
I can't "control my drinking or even my not-drinking. I can control those thoughts and emotions that drove me to drink in the first place.
"Each is his own master".
(Siddhartha Gautama)
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 343
One of the paradoxes that was troubled me at first was the notion that I was powerless but also responsible for my actions. I simply could not grasp how I should be responsible for something if I was powerless over it. "Not my fault," kind of thinking, you know.
I probably cannot add to what some have already said about reconciling the two concepts. I suspect that in my still-not-clear mind the two were disparate and perhaps contradictory. I was inclined to thinking in absolutes quite often at the time. With time I came to understand both, but I am at a loss to articulate. I believe my understanding is a function of spiritual growth, and the longer I am sober the less need I have for finite definitions. The best I can do is to is explain that I think more in gray terms rather than black & white ones.
I probably cannot add to what some have already said about reconciling the two concepts. I suspect that in my still-not-clear mind the two were disparate and perhaps contradictory. I was inclined to thinking in absolutes quite often at the time. With time I came to understand both, but I am at a loss to articulate. I believe my understanding is a function of spiritual growth, and the longer I am sober the less need I have for finite definitions. The best I can do is to is explain that I think more in gray terms rather than black & white ones.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Huntington Woods, Michigan
Posts: 465
Originally Posted by amethyst05
Something finally clicked for me, I'm not physically addicted to alcohol but it's become a psychological compulsion. Just like people with OCD perform compulsive rituals to manage their anxiety and create an illusion of control over negative thoughts and emotions, the behaviors seem irrational to everyone around them, but they feel like they can't stop no matter how much this interferes with living a normal life. Eating disorders are similar to addictions in that they're usually about control too, even though it's a tricky paradox. So why isn't alcoholism treated as a compulsion? AA treats the symptoms, not the underlying causes.. You're completely powerless over your addiction? No, you're not. How many people has this actually prevented from getting or staying sober? There are many things in life we can't control, our own thoughts and feelings included at times, but we can control how we view and react to them. I don't believe alcoholism is a disease, it might be a mental illness brought on by genetic predisposition and/or environmental factors, but it's not a permanent condition and alcohol itself isn't the problem imo. So that's my rant, I want to help myself and help others but feel like there's something twisted about the way our society treats addiction.
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