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Couldn't go two hours without a drink !

Old 04-30-2015, 10:47 PM
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I am only on Day 1, but I have never drank during work hours or before work hours, as that would just freak me out. I get the cravings on the way home from work around 6 pm. I wake up hungover and am functional again by around noon or 1 pm, and then I return to work. I want to stop now before it gets any worse.
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Old 05-03-2015, 05:15 AM
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I used to get up so as to go to work at around 4:30 AM. Towards the end of my career, I would pound down two tall cans of Bud while in my morning shower. (I thought) that I truly enjoyed this. Sometimes burping up beer foam because I was forcing the beer down so fast. Then take a few of my prescription meds and head out early to work. It was hard to keep within the lines on the freeway at times. Once at work a few cups of coffee and I would be kind of OK. Then into the company vehicle and a quick stop at the liquor store so as to buy some beer for the morning work assignments. Working out in the field kept me away from the supervisor. Yes, as I look back today, I was in real bad shape. MM
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Old 05-03-2015, 05:21 AM
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I don't believe any of us who drank in the mornings ever expected that we would. The booze is insidious that way. I started off as a binger at parties and whatnot. Then binged before anything social (to help ease anxiety, or so I thought). Then drank before anything that gave me anxiety. Then started having anxiety before any activity. Then drank throughout the day to manage that... I work at home, mostly. Then woke up with anxiety. Then started drinking first thing in the morning and throughout the day. Self medication turned to self poison. And I never saw my drowning coming until I was already deep under water.
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:55 PM
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Bottom for me was sitting at my desk, trying to hide the shakes and my chattering teeth from my boss who was standing right in front of me because it was someones birthday. Everyone was issued birthday cake (wonderful cake). But because i couldnt hide the shakes while holding the weak ass plastic fork trying to keep the cake on the fork i just tried to keep working because typing as fast as i do was the easiest way to hide my jitters. I took a smoke break and was so dizzy from withdrawal it was hard to walk straight. Once in the elevator heading down 33 floors I could just breathe and hold onto the railing in privacy. Outside i checked my tremors and they were bad.

Id already seen my doctor and was planning to check into detox by that time, had all the numbers but no time during business hours that were private. Next day i was on the list, and had ativan to help me through work but that was the worst day ever. I had to slam 13 ounces in 30 minutes just to get calmed down to somewhat normal.
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Old 05-04-2015, 03:59 AM
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It's early Monday morning here 3:51 AM. Reading some of your stories told here, helps me to keep all important things to do or not do for the day to the front of my mind. Staying sober today is of most importance.

I usually come to this site first thing after waking up.
Helps one to get a good start on a sober day.

Mountainmanbob
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:01 AM
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Good morning, mountainmanbob! Thanks for starting this thread. I revisit it first thing each morning too!
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Old 05-04-2015, 11:16 AM
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I remember the same feeling MM. Waking up and instantly wanting a drink and only being able to go a couple hours...before withdrawal took over. It was a horrible feeling and a horrible cycle. I remember leaving some booze next to my bed, so I could slug some back soon as I opened my eyes.

I don't miss any of it. I never want to go back.
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Old 05-04-2015, 02:12 PM
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Keeping it fresh always is a big motivator. Never forget is right.
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Old 05-04-2015, 03:18 PM
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I know I never imagined drinking before work, during lunch, on the way home and all night. I remember waking up during the night in a panic not being able to get back to sleep. I would just get up and chug down what I had to try and make myself able to sleep or just start the days drinking right then. The shame when the liquor store attendant wishes you good morning. I can't let myself forget this nightmare again. Reading everyone's stories reaffirms that. There is no living in that.
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Old 05-04-2015, 05:59 PM
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Thanks to this place, I never drank until I got to 5 o'clock. Once I got there though a beer was in my hand.

I have no doubt I was heading down the path of drinking during the day. I knew I was in trouble because it used to be 6 o'clock, and at one point, 8 o'clock
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Old 05-05-2015, 12:32 AM
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Originally Posted by paintballguy View Post
Bottom for me was sitting at my desk, trying to hide the shakes and my chattering teeth from my boss....
wow. I'd never heard of anyone else having the chattering teeth. I had this, though it was pretty subtle. My tongue would also feel trembly. What awful memories!
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Old 05-05-2015, 02:07 AM
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Originally Posted by NikTes View Post
Good morning, mountainmanbob! Thanks for starting this thread. I revisit it first thing each morning too!
Good Morning to you NikTes
I'm right with you here.
I just woke up and it's very early here.
First thing done this morning.
Checking this thread.

Thank you all for reminding me of how it was.

Mountainman
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Old 05-05-2015, 06:21 AM
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I'm currently extremely hungover at work. Was sober two months but fell of the wagon. This is nuts.
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Old 05-05-2015, 06:25 AM
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Originally Posted by trez View Post
I'm currently extremely hungover at work. Was sober two months but fell of the wagon. This is nuts.
Sorry to hear that Trez...hope we can help you get back on track.
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Old 05-05-2015, 06:40 AM
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I'd give my entire salary to feel normal right now. I'm in a pretty sorry state. I managed to throw on a tie and make it to work, but I can't imagine that I'll get anything done today. Why the heck do I do this to myself? This is insanity.
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Old 05-05-2015, 07:32 AM
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Originally Posted by trez View Post
made it to work, but I can't imagine that I'll get anything done today.

Why the heck do I do this to myself?

This is insanity.
I remember so many mornings dragging like that at work. Hung over and hating the way in which I was feeling. Knowing that there was no way that I could do a good job while in that condition. Telling myself never again, only to go home after work and start the drinking and using process all over again.

How I made it to retirement, I'll never know. I do thank God for my retirement check for I so easily could have been fired as were many of my drinking friends.

Mountainman
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Old 05-05-2015, 07:48 AM
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I wish I could fast forward to the point where I feel normal again. Right now I have some shakes and I feel like I'm not getting enough oxygen out of the air.
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Old 05-05-2015, 08:23 AM
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Originally Posted by trez View Post
I wish I could fast forward to the point where I feel normal again. Right now I have some shakes and I feel like I'm not getting enough oxygen out of the air.
Don't be afraid to seek help if it gets too bad. WD's are temporary but they can be potentially dangerous too. Is there anyone else around who is aware that you just quit drinking?
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Old 05-05-2015, 08:40 AM
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My wife and a buddy on the west coast who has also acknowledged that he's alcoholic. We text back and forth about our drinking. We both had bad relapses starting on Thursday and drank through the end of the night last night.
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Old 05-05-2015, 08:44 AM
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Originally Posted by trez View Post
My wife and a buddy on the west coast who has also acknowledged that he's alcoholic. We text back and forth about our drinking. We both had bad relapses starting on Thursday and drank through the end of the night last night.
I meant anyone locally - there at your place of work, or a spouse/friend that is nearby? Just in case you need physical assistance.
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