lovespell

Tonight I took my son to baseball and ran to the grocery store. Broke, indescribably sad and stressed as I mentally counted the prices of items in my cart thinking I may have enough to grab a six pack. But why? I don't like to drink alone. I don't like to drink at home by myself. I just thought it would make me feel better. Relief from my constant churning thoughts. I didn't get it. I paused for a moment and watched others happily checking out the selections and I kept on walking. Now I can go home and cook for my kids. Take a shower. Practice nurturing. I have court with my ex husband in the morning over child support and I hate hate hate fighting them. I know that was my trigger for wanting a reprieve. But I'm ok. And as long as I'm conscious of my decisions and really giving it a try I will gain confidence. I have no coping skills. The way I cope is by avoiding everything. Running away. Distracting. I can no longer do this. I am starting to really try and practice mindfullness but it is soooo hard for me. That six pack would have never been enough anyways. It never was.

LBrain

Getting a handle on reality and coping skills does take some work. But I guarantee you drinking will prevent progress in that direction.

Good luck tomorrow. Stay sober, stay on top of things.

Turtle82

Great job!!!!



Good luck tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you.

MsJax

You did great. Mindfulness is a cornerstone for me in my wellness Keep going! I hope it goes good for you tomorrow, I hate things like that too.

growpath

Great job love!!

Soberwolf

Awesome Lovespell

zjw

good job. i felt like i was just walking in darkness when i sobered up no coping skills at all. over time I built up a coping skills tool box now all i have to do is remember to use them!

it will get easier. theres always going to be problems always going to be excuses to drink. I just had to figure out how to focus on the other side of all of that instead of wallowing in it with a case of beer. Before I sobered up its like I couldnt wait to go jump in a pile of my own crap thinking thats all there was to do.

But thats not all there is theres more to life problems and struggles are just bumps in the road some larger then others but none are reasons to drink.

PurpleKnight

Fantastic!!

neferkamichael

Lovespell, Passed it up tonight? You are just so FANTASTIC, congratulations, rootin for ya.

Hevyn

So true lovespell - it's never enough. Very glad you realize that and are ready for your new life.