DoloresHaze

It might be silly, but I've heard that it helps some people to write "goodbye" letters to alcohol. I'm at a desperate place and have nothing to lose. Maybe someone out there can relate. Here it goes...

Dear alcohol,

It pains me to say it, but our relationship is sick and it must end. That being said, I'll give you credit where credit is due. When I feel scared and frazzled, you calm me. When I obsess about things, you hush my mind. I love zoning out and watching funny youtube vids with you And i love the way you make conversations in the kitchen with my husband flow so easily and happily.
But you come with a hefty price. For every good moment you bring me, you bring me 10 nights of crying, 10 mornings feeling sick, and countless hours of worry and guilt. I'm obssessed with you! I think about you all the time. I spend all my money on you.
Our relationship has gotten so sick that you put me in the hospital. And yeah, for a while I avoided you, but i came running back. I don't want to go there again, so we have to go our seperate ways.
As it is now, I feel like I'm cheating on my family with you. i lie to my spouse about how much i see you. I'm cheating my son out of a mommy who's 100% there.
So let;s face the cold, hard truth. You made me think i loved you and made me think you'd be there for me, but here I am on a beautiful Spring day, crying. Here's one more black-cherry flavored kiss, then you and i are no more.

As for me, I'll hurt for a while, but i'll be ok. With any luck, i'll be great.

leviathan

yep. good stuff.

RDBplus3

The 12 Steps of AA sure helped me turn that 'Luck' into a REALITY.

RDBplus3...Happy, Joyous, and FREE...and I KNOW you can be 2.

Soberwolf

Good stuff DH

DoloresHaze

That's where I want to be. I quit before and for some reason, it was a breeze. This time is HARD. But surely the struggle has to be more interesting than day after day of the same damn thing.

zjw

you know reading that it sounds like a rather abusive relationship. One I know I was in also. makes you think tho "who's the abuser?"

thanks for your post.

pixy

My sponsor suggested I did this as part of step 1. Makes perfect sense.

Good luck with your journey.

Dee74

I think you should write another one now that 'last kiss' is over...and don't feel pained by the goodbye - exult in it

D

JeffreyAK

It might be interesting for you to write goodbye letters periodically and see how they evolve, as you stay abstinent. They will evolve, and keeping the collection gives you something to go back and read later if you really feel tempted.