tes

I know that I have been on and off of these forums, I have really bad internet connection and cant pay the bill most of the time. I have been cut off, no money, keys, anything and I am being watched like a hawk. I am now drinking mouth wash, which I have never done. Kroger brand. I have such a high tolerance that I can feel it but just barely. I managed to kick the benzo addiction, but I cannot stop plotting and thinking of that next drink. It is my morning desire, I care for nothing else. I have never been so selfish in my life and I do not understand it. Now, I used to drink Robotusin DM to trip off some time back, but mouth wash though. I cant stop myself. I need the drink and will do to any resort to get it, legal anyway. Has anyone done this as a last resort? I know rehab will not work for me. AA might, but I have difficulities getting there. Im scared.

SunnyMe

I'm so sorry, tes. Why do you know that rehab will not work? Have you tried any AA meetings?

There is help, and there is hope. I'm glad you're here.

Boleo

Don't think of yourself as selfish or foolish. You appear selfish and foolish simply because that's what the ISM component of alcohol-ISM does to a person (any person). Judging it does not help your situation. You must do whatever it takes to find a solution. Detach from all judgement after that.

Anything that gets between a alcoholic and his/her next drink causes an emotional disturbance. Don't fool yourself in thinking Rehab won't work... you are simply afraid it will work only too well and you won't get to indulge in your favorite activity (drinking) ever again.

SoberAlky

I'm with Sunnylife. How DO you know rehab won't work? And how do you think that going to several hypothetical hours worth of meetings is going to help more than inpatient rehab where you are removed from your life and all the distractions and temptations that came with it? We can only relate our own experiences to each other but for me, AA alone didn't work. Going to meetings, listening to people share and working the steps made for some good post-rehab reflection, but AA is not going to see you safely detoxed, AA is not going to give you medication to ease your cravings and transition back into sobriety, and AA is not going to give you concrete DO THIS NOT THAT advice for achieving and maintaining sobriety for every waking moment. One surefire way to fail though is to go into it thinking it's going to fail. Again, this is just my opinion, but if you're drinking mouthwash and cough medication to catch a buzz, you're going to need more than meetings.

Dee74

Do see a Dr, Tes or go to the ER. Its really important you get help with detox, I think.
Then you can work out what to do from there.

D

tes

Soberalky, I was wrong in saying that rehab will not work. Personally, I have been to detox 3 times. ~5 day stay, fed Librium, Ativan, bp monitored. I have never been to an actual long term rehab so I don't have the right to say anything about it. I am open to the concept, it might work if it is a stay longer than 5 days. I cannot afford it, they are quite expensive.

I pretty much know how to detox myself now. I have a bottle of klonopin put up, as a just in case measure and also have my bp meds and monitor.

I will say one thing though, I am not going to drink mouth wash again. It is horrible. Anyone considering doing that, don't.

IOAA2

Hi Tes.

You indicate difficulty getting to AA meetings. Does that mean difficulty with the concept of the program or physically getting to one?

If it’s getting to one of the thousand probably in the Atlanta area try calling AA Central Service and inquire about transportation to meetings with a member.

Part of AAs credo is staying sober AND helping another alcoholic.

BE WELL

tes

Physically getting there is an issue. I need to ask around next time I go to a meeting on ways to get there.

Venecia

Please take Dee's advice and go to your nearest ER.

Here are some resources, too:

AA in Atlanta
Alcoholics Anonymous
After Hours Hotline
You can call (404) 525-3178 anytime of day or night to reach volunteers for help or information on A.A. meetings and programs. There are over 1,100 A.A. meetings each week in Atlanta.

National Alliance for Mental Illness
Resources for Mental Illness - Crisis Intervention - NAMI Northside Atlanta | Nami Northside Atlanta
Crisis Stabilization/Emergencies

Georgia Crisis and Access Line: 1 800 715-4225 (ww.mygcal.com)
Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1 800 273-8255 (TALK)
Emergency Police: 911 (ask for a CIT (Crisis Intervention Trained) officer)
Grady Psychiatric Emergency Clinic for Adults: 404 616-4762
United Way: 211 (211online.unitedwayatlanta.org)


Fulton County
RESOURCES FOR ADDICTION & SUBSTANCE ABUSE
Services are provided at the Center for Health & Rehabilitation, 265 Boulevard, NE, Atlanta, GA 30312. The main telephone number is (404) 613-3789, and is available Monday thru Friday from 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM.

You also can call our Behavioral Health Access & Information Line at (404) 613-3675 Monday thru Friday from 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM. After hours, please call the Georgia Access & Crisis Line at 1-800-715-4225.

chickippo

i drank mouthwash too - in the mornings to stave off a crippling hangover so i could at least dress and get to the shop for booze.

stop doing it, please. there could be horrible health repercussions, although i am not a doctor so am obviously not giving medical advice!

i'm 11 months sober now. it can be done, with some hard work.

please be well.

tes

I am ok now I guess, home detoxed again with benzos and bp meds. Cravings are terrible though. I resist to goto ER as I have been there 2 times in 7 months and owe a ton of money, have lawyers calling me.

Dee74

now you need a plan to stay sober tes - do you have any ideas?

D

Latte

I am so sorry.

You can talk to the hospital social worker and get on state health care. It will pay retroactively 6 months I believe.

My thoughts are with you.

sugarbear1

ask local rehabs if they have scholarships which means it's paid for by someone else.....

LaTraviata

Hi, tes. Greetings from Central New York. Hope you're feeling better. If you're still using the benzos, it would be wise to get some medical attention.

Have you looked into Medicaid? It has covered 100% of my five ER visits, two inpatient detoxes, medication, and unlimited counseling.

About Rehab: There are inpatient rehabs which accept Medicaid. Even if rehab doesn't "cure" all the underlying causes of your addiction, it will at least get you dried out. By the end of your stay, you'll have more energy and a clearer head that you can then use to solve problems getting in the way of your recovery -- finances, transportation, etc. While you're there, they'll work with you to get a plan together and resources lined up so you can continue your recovery when you get out.

About AA: Whether or not AA produces a spiritual awakening for you, it's a great place to get moral and practical support from people who really know the ropes. So I really encourage you to call AA and ask them to help you get a ride.