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Old 02-11-2015, 10:50 AM
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Looking for some guidance

Be been reading and posting on here for a bit, and I've been doing better, but not good enough in my sobriety. I keep getting sober for consecutive days of varying amounts, then rationalizing my way into consecutive days of drinking every night. I can't seem to break this cycle. Right now in 3 days on the sober side and want to make a sincere run at putting it all behind me. My question is, is there someone on this site that can be a sponsor, or mentor to people like me to see me through this? I don't want to go to local meetings, for several reasons, but I'd love to at least be able to check in, and speak to someone regularly. Someone who can hold me accountable. I don't know if that exists here. Well, thank you for listening, and wish me luck!
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Old 02-11-2015, 11:33 AM
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Hi Dave you might find support in the 12 step section or secular section

I was also suggest you start your own thread where you hold yourself accountable

You can post in the 24h thread and join a monthly class
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:06 PM
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If you won't go to local meetings, fine. People get sober without AA. But they "work" their recovery, whatever it is. Make a commitment to read and post to SR daily. For a minimum of six months. It's great that you recognize that you have a problem with accountability. But in the end, no one can hold you accountable. That's on you.

Good luck.
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:08 PM
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I've sponsored a number of guys in AA over the years. Every one of them who has taken the 12 Steps and continued to stay engaged in the work has recovered from alcoholism. Most, if not all, who haven't done that have returned to drinking.

My wife held me accountable, as did the legal system and my employer. And I still drank, over and over. It was obvious after a while that accountability and someone to talk to were not what I needed.
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:14 PM
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I am holding myself accountable. Hence my endless cycle of trying to quit. And I am seeking help. This thread is in exercise in that. I don't mind working steps, and I'm committed to holding myself accountable. I was just looking for guidance. Clearly I can't do this alone. I can't go to local meetings and my wife is an enabler, but a very supportive and good woman. I appreciate the advice and any support anyone can give.
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:29 PM
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Originally Posted by DaveAnomie View Post
I am holding myself accountable. Hence my endless cycle of trying to quit. And I am seeking help. This thread is in exercise in that. I don't mind working steps, and I'm committed to holding myself accountable. I was just looking for guidance. Clearly I can't do this alone. I can't go to local meetings and my wife is an enabler, but a very supportive and good woman. I appreciate the advice and any support anyone can give.
Have you considered self-paced sobriety methods like AVRT? If you cannot/will not go to any local meetings that type of method may be your only option along with support of SR or other similar type forums.

You could join the 24 hour threads or the class of February over in the daily support thread area

Newcomer's Daily Support Threads - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:39 PM
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What is AVRT? I'm not really aware of what's out there. I'm willing to do almost anything, and I have an open mind. I've already quit and gone three days. Now I need the next steps. Any advice is very welcome!
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Old 02-11-2015, 12:43 PM
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Many of us here in SR share regularly using
our ESH - Experiences, Strengths and Hopes
of what our lives were and are like, before,
during and after drinking or drugs.

We share with willingness, open-mindedness
as well as honesty all to the best of our abilities,
helping, guiding, supporting, communicationg,
understanding, care and concern.

Finding help, reaching out for help, asking
for what you need in assisting you with learning
how to remain sober or clean one day at a time.
Make some healthy changes in your life to
achieve a strong, solid recovery foundation
to live your life upon for many days sober down
the road one step at a time.
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Old 02-11-2015, 01:34 PM
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Originally Posted by DaveAnomie View Post
What is AVRT? I'm not really aware of what's out there. I'm willing to do almost anything, and I have an open mind. I've already quit and gone three days. Now I need the next steps. Any advice is very welcome!
AVRT (Addictive Voice Recognition Technique) is part of Rational Recovery, and is a self paced/self-help style recovery method. There are books about it and lots of info at their website

There are several FAQ's about it and folks who practice it in the secular forum here too
Secular Connections - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Last edited by Dee74; 02-11-2015 at 04:22 PM.
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Old 02-11-2015, 02:19 PM
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Spend some time on here reading and posting. There is a lot of wisdom in these pages. Post when you want to and you will get lots of support. In the end it's true though that you are only really accountable to yourself. As you read you will find many paths that people take to get sober and you can choose what works best for you.
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Old 02-11-2015, 04:19 PM
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I posted on the 24 hour check in. That's a good tool! I'll keep posting here and read up on AVRT. Thank you!
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:01 PM
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Praying never hurt neither. ..
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:07 PM
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Got the big book of AA ?
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:10 PM
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I don't have the big book of AA. Where do you get that?
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:19 PM
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Google it and there are several websites with free downloads of the Big Book.
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:39 PM
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got my big book for free after going to jail some 8 years ago lol. You should honestly consider meetings, its about breaking habits yeah?
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Old 02-11-2015, 06:45 PM
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Originally Posted by DaveAnomie View Post
I don't have the big book of AA. Where do you get that?
Yu can search " big book online" and read it online until ya get a real one in front of ya. The first 164 pages explain a lot about alcoholism and also the solution. After page 164 is personal stories. Good idea to read them,too.
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Old 02-12-2015, 03:46 AM
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I got my 1st BB while in rehab 24 yrs ago.
Its used, worn, yellowed, marked, cherished,
appreciated. I also bought one on Ebay that
has large print for those of us with difficulty
reading small print.

Whatever works will guide you into long term
sobriety. Also, never hesitate to ask questions.
Its when we don't ask that we will never know.
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Old 02-12-2015, 06:31 AM
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yeah the big book is online for free at AA site I think. I got mine used off amazon and gave it away and hten had to order another one haha.
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Old 02-12-2015, 08:06 AM
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I'll pick up the big book. Did some reading last night on AVRT. Really like the ideas there. Want to get as many ideas as I can and find what works for me. Today I just got up, and hit the gym. Have the whole day planned out, including getting up and hitting the gym again in the morning. No doubt in my mind I'll get that far 😄
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