Losing memories in recovery
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Virginia
Posts: 16
Losing memories in recovery
I was one of those that blacked out almost every time I drank. That was actually one of the things that finally made me say I can't do this anymore. The guilt and embarrassment of not remembering anything from the night before was awful. I haven't touched a drop of alcohol since December 26th and I wake up every morning so thankful that I remember everything that happened the previous day. Today I am officially scared there is something wrong with me due to my drinking. My son was talking to me this afternoon about his girlfriend who had quit drinking several months ago. I asked him if he had told her yet that I had quit drinking. He said, "Mom you told her. Actually you told her two different times". I don't remember ever saying that to her. I don't remember her answer. I honestly don't think I would have told her that because he told me she probably wouldn't feel comfortable discussing it with me right now. I freaked out. I said are you SURE that I told her because I don't remember! He said yes you did. You were probably just tired and that's why you don't remember. I've been racking my brain ever since our conversation and I truly don't remember it at all. I'm so afraid. Now I'm losing time sober!?? What is wrong with me? 
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
It’s not uncommon to have memory issues early in sobriety, especially if you were a regular blackout drinker. If you think about it, it’s a bit much to expect your memory to return to normal within just 3 weeks after repeatedly bombing it into oblivion for what I assume was years. If you’d been hitting yourself in the head with a hammer all that time (a fair analogy, I submit), would you expect to be fully healed in just 3 weeks?
Believe me, I know how hard it is to be patient, but recovery takes a lot of patience — amongst many other qualities!
My memory was pretty badly impaired at first and has been slow to improve — at nearly 2 years sober I still have issues. From what I’ve read, though, my case is pretty extreme. The timeline for memory improvement for most people is typically shorter, maybe in the 3 to 6 month range, although it seems to vary a lot depending on the individual.
I’ve found that putting consistent effort into my recovery helps all areas of brain function, including memory.
Believe me, I know how hard it is to be patient, but recovery takes a lot of patience — amongst many other qualities!
My memory was pretty badly impaired at first and has been slow to improve — at nearly 2 years sober I still have issues. From what I’ve read, though, my case is pretty extreme. The timeline for memory improvement for most people is typically shorter, maybe in the 3 to 6 month range, although it seems to vary a lot depending on the individual.
I’ve found that putting consistent effort into my recovery helps all areas of brain function, including memory.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
It's important not to panic Liz. It will take a while for things to get back to normal and a little forgetfulness is normal.
There are still large parts of my life I can't remember but I think my memory is back to as good as it's ever been.
Have faith and give it time
D
There are still large parts of my life I can't remember but I think my memory is back to as good as it's ever been.
Have faith and give it time
D
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 378
Hi Liz, I'm on day 13 sober today and the last few days I've been experiencing some issues with my short term memory and in general, I'm finding it difficult to focus. Even in a short conversation I need to ask a person to repeat what they said as I just can't focus and remember.
I was also a binge, blackout drinker. The last few months in my drinking career I'd experience a blackout after a fairly small amount - like a couple drinks. Scary, but definitely played a huge part in my decision to quit.
I'm hoping it will pass, from what other people are saying here it seems to take several months, most common threshold seems to be 6 months. I was told by a doctor that for most addicts (not only alcoholics) it might take up to two years for the brain to more or less recover.
I was also a binge, blackout drinker. The last few months in my drinking career I'd experience a blackout after a fairly small amount - like a couple drinks. Scary, but definitely played a huge part in my decision to quit.
I'm hoping it will pass, from what other people are saying here it seems to take several months, most common threshold seems to be 6 months. I was told by a doctor that for most addicts (not only alcoholics) it might take up to two years for the brain to more or less recover.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Virginia
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by IfYouCanDream 
Hi Liz, I'm on day 13 sober today and the last few days I've been experiencing some issues with my short term memory and in general, I'm finding it difficult to focus. Even in a short conversation I need to ask a person to repeat what they said as I just can't focus and remember.
I was also a binge, blackout drinker. The last few months in my drinking career I'd experience a blackout after a fairly small amount - like a couple drinks. Scary, but definitely played a huge part in my decision to quit.
I'm hoping it will pass, from what other people are saying here it seems to take several months, most common threshold seems to be 6 months. I was told by a doctor that for most addicts (not only alcoholics) it might take up to two years for the brain to more or less recover.
I was also a binge, blackout drinker. The last few months in my drinking career I'd experience a blackout after a fairly small amount - like a couple drinks. Scary, but definitely played a huge part in my decision to quit.
I'm hoping it will pass, from what other people are saying here it seems to take several months, most common threshold seems to be 6 months. I was told by a doctor that for most addicts (not only alcoholics) it might take up to two years for the brain to more or less recover.
I haven't discussed any of this with a doctor (even quitting drinking - I always lied to them about my drinking habits) so I was really nervous that maybe I'd have to go in and talk to them about this memory stuff. Hopefully it will work itself out with time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Virginia
Posts: 16
So I was looking up stuff about this on Google of course and I ran across some info on PAWS. I could relate to a lot of the symptoms. Do I need to see a doctor or just make some changes in my diet, exercise, add yoga/meditation in, etc... ? I also read that taking Thiamine may help? Anyone know anything about this stuff?
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Originally Posted by LizWM126
Do I need to see a doctor or just make some changes in my diet, exercise, add yoga/meditation in, etc... ? I also read that taking Thiamine may help? Anyone know anything about this stuff?
Google the supplements. Also, you might want to read Seven Weeks to Sobriety by Joan Mathews Larson, and The Mood Cure by Julia Ross. I used the first book in the first six months to a year. I used the second book after the year mark.
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
I am sure there will be people that come along with suggestions but remember...
Time takes time.
I can relate and I had a horrible memory in early recovery. I was scatter brained and I dropped stuff all the time.
It does get better, in time.
Take it easy and I heard that keeping a daily journal can help.
I am a sticky note person. I had sticky notes to remind me to pay bills and things I needed around the house.
Some of this may have been alcoholism, some of it may have been because lets face it, I am getting older!
I didn’t realize how bad my eyes were until I got sober. I was so used to being drunk or in a fog that I didn’t even notice that I could not see things clearly. I thought I had diabetes or something was seriously wrong. I went to the eye doctor and lo and behold I needed glasses. This was three months after I stopped drinking.
Give your mind and body a chance to heal and if you don’t see any improvement or you are seriously worried then seek out a doctor and get a check up.
Everything is going to be okay
Time takes time.
I can relate and I had a horrible memory in early recovery. I was scatter brained and I dropped stuff all the time.
It does get better, in time.
Take it easy and I heard that keeping a daily journal can help.
I am a sticky note person. I had sticky notes to remind me to pay bills and things I needed around the house.
Some of this may have been alcoholism, some of it may have been because lets face it, I am getting older!
I didn’t realize how bad my eyes were until I got sober. I was so used to being drunk or in a fog that I didn’t even notice that I could not see things clearly. I thought I had diabetes or something was seriously wrong. I went to the eye doctor and lo and behold I needed glasses. This was three months after I stopped drinking.
Give your mind and body a chance to heal and if you don’t see any improvement or you are seriously worried then seek out a doctor and get a check up.
Everything is going to be okay
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
Hi Liz! Sorry if I was a bit abrupt in my earlier post. I’m not as good at the compassion aspect as other posters are and often I don’t realize it until I view my post in context.
I was kind of a PAWS poster boy, so I learned a bit about it. PAWS isn’t really something you "get," like the flu; it’s more of a catch-all term for various symptoms — including memory issues — that linger after the initial acute withdrawal phase is over. I’ve noticed there seems to be a correlation between blackout drinking and the incidence of PAWS. There are some good discussions about PAWS on this very forum if you try the search function. In any case, there’s not much a doctor can do about PAWS. I agree with your ideas about diet, exercise, meditation, and/or yoga. Dietary supplements (including B vitamins such as thiamine, which get depleted by drinking) can’t hurt either.
It may seem obvious, but for me the most important thing was to remember not to drink. It was very easy for me to get discouraged because I didn’t start feeling better as quickly as I expected, and that was all my addicted brain needed to convince me that there was no hope, that I might as well drink again. Obviously, every time I did, I set myself back to square one, or even worse as the damage is progressive and cumulative.
Hang in there! You can do this!
I was kind of a PAWS poster boy, so I learned a bit about it. PAWS isn’t really something you "get," like the flu; it’s more of a catch-all term for various symptoms — including memory issues — that linger after the initial acute withdrawal phase is over. I’ve noticed there seems to be a correlation between blackout drinking and the incidence of PAWS. There are some good discussions about PAWS on this very forum if you try the search function. In any case, there’s not much a doctor can do about PAWS. I agree with your ideas about diet, exercise, meditation, and/or yoga. Dietary supplements (including B vitamins such as thiamine, which get depleted by drinking) can’t hurt either.
It may seem obvious, but for me the most important thing was to remember not to drink. It was very easy for me to get discouraged because I didn’t start feeling better as quickly as I expected, and that was all my addicted brain needed to convince me that there was no hope, that I might as well drink again. Obviously, every time I did, I set myself back to square one, or even worse as the damage is progressive and cumulative.
Hang in there! You can do this!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Virginia
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by Andante
Hi Liz! Sorry if I was a bit abrupt in my earlier post. I’m not as good at the compassion aspect as other posters are and often I don’t realize it until I view my post in context.
I was kind of a PAWS poster boy, so I learned a bit about it. PAWS isn’t really something you "get," like the flu; it’s more of a catch-all term for various symptoms — including memory issues — that linger after the initial acute withdrawal phase is over. I’ve noticed there seems to be a correlation between blackout drinking and the incidence of PAWS. There are some good discussions about PAWS on this very forum if you try the search function. In any case, there’s not much a doctor can do about PAWS. I agree with your ideas about diet, exercise, meditation, and/or yoga. Dietary supplements (including B vitamins such as thiamine, which get depleted by drinking) can’t hurt either.
It may seem obvious, but for me the most important thing was to remember not to drink. It was very easy for me to get discouraged because I didn’t start feeling better as quickly as I expected, and that was all my addicted brain needed to convince me that there was no hope, that I might as well drink again. Obviously, every time I did, I set myself back to square one, or even worse as the damage is progressive and cumulative.
Hang in there! You can do this!
I was kind of a PAWS poster boy, so I learned a bit about it. PAWS isn’t really something you "get," like the flu; it’s more of a catch-all term for various symptoms — including memory issues — that linger after the initial acute withdrawal phase is over. I’ve noticed there seems to be a correlation between blackout drinking and the incidence of PAWS. There are some good discussions about PAWS on this very forum if you try the search function. In any case, there’s not much a doctor can do about PAWS. I agree with your ideas about diet, exercise, meditation, and/or yoga. Dietary supplements (including B vitamins such as thiamine, which get depleted by drinking) can’t hurt either.
It may seem obvious, but for me the most important thing was to remember not to drink. It was very easy for me to get discouraged because I didn’t start feeling better as quickly as I expected, and that was all my addicted brain needed to convince me that there was no hope, that I might as well drink again. Obviously, every time I did, I set myself back to square one, or even worse as the damage is progressive and cumulative.
Hang in there! You can do this!
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