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When will it get easier?

Old 12-23-2014, 12:18 PM
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When will it get easier?

I went to ER, detox, 30-day treatment, and now I'm living in a sober house. I'm 25 years old so I'm very new to this... I'm doing all of the right things; attending AA meetings 3-4 times a week, working the 12 steps, speaking to my sponsor, relying on my Higher Power, surrendering and having willingness, etc. I've only been sober for 33 days. There are times when I feel completely confident about lifelong sobriety but there are times when I feel like a hopeless case. I go back and forth, just like my cravings: they come and go. What I'd like to ask is if you guys have any "tips" or pieces of advice of how this process can be easier and less painful. What helped you all the most? I receive the "one day at a time" advice so I've heard that one before.

In the house I live in, there are many rules. Dating is prohibited, which is understandable... I've been trying to find substitutes like coffee, tea, diet soda, candy, and nicotine to get through the day. It's hard, I'm not going to lie, but I'm thankful that I'm sober.

Any advice? Please and thank you.
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Old 12-23-2014, 12:34 PM
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First off, congrats on 33 days sober.

When I first came to SR, about two and a half weeks into my sobriety, I too wondered when the "miracle" was going to happen. Someone wisely told me to be patient. That it took me a while to get where I was with my drinking and it was going to take me a little while to get where I needed to be in my recovery.

I think as addicts/alcoholics, we expect instant gratification. Recovery doesn't work that way. But it does work!
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Old 12-23-2014, 12:37 PM
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Originally Posted by ErJoy1989 View Post
I went to ER, detox, 30-day treatment, and now I'm living in a sober house. I'm 25 years old so I'm very new to this... I'm doing all of the right things; attending AA meetings 3-4 times a week, working the 12 steps, speaking to my sponsor, relying on my Higher Power, surrendering and having willingness, etc. I've only been sober for 33 days. There are times when I feel completely confident about lifelong sobriety but there are times when I feel like a hopeless case. I go back and forth, just like my cravings: they come and go. What I'd like to ask is if you guys have any "tips" or pieces of advice of how this process can be easier and less painful. What helped you all the most? I receive the "one day at a time" advice so I've heard that one before.

In the house I live in, there are many rules. Dating is prohibited, which is understandable... I've been trying to find substitutes like coffee, tea, diet soda, candy, and nicotine to get through the day. It's hard, I'm not going to lie, but I'm thankful that I'm sober.

Any advice? Please and thank you.
It's different for everyone but the consensus around here IIRC is about three months in total and you have the hard part licked. Another thing is to be careful about the caffeine and sugar. Your brain is still adjusting to being without alcohol and so you don't want to set up another habit.
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Old 12-23-2014, 01:16 PM
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Welcome to SR ErJoy

33 days is fantastic

try this http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html
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Old 12-23-2014, 01:39 PM
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keep doing what your doing. I found it stunk for a while. each day was only a teeny teeny tiny it better then the last. I new going back to drinking would be considerably worse but I didnt see how sobriety was that much better. But if I took a chunk of time and looked back say a week or a month i started to realize i was a bit more better off then I realized.

I'd say worry about here and not there. Its more about the journey then the destination. IE gotta fix the inner before the outer can be good.

It sounds to me like your doing pretty good. Just give it time and keep doing what your doing. Sadly its not an overnight process. I dont think there was a time i really turned the corner it was more a gradual thing over time. But I guess at like 9 monhts or so I felt like things where turning a corner and again at a year or so. But thats not to say it wasnt getting easier at 2 and 3 months or someting. I just had AHA moments at those times is all.

Being greatful about how far you have come goes a long way. rather then thinking about how ar you have to go or something.
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Old 12-23-2014, 01:57 PM
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Looks like you're doing all the right stuff. When I was drinking, I drank for the effect. I thought it helped to make me feel better and I guess to a point it did, at least I thought it did. When I came to AA, I thought that because I had quit drinking, everything was going to change right away. My sponsor told me I was doing what I should have been doing all along and just because I didn't drink any more, didn't mean the world was going to stop and take notice. I did the same things you're doing. I went to meetings every day and talked to my sponsor every day. I worked the steps every day and I didn't drink. I was too busy getting sober to think about drinking. At about 4 months I realized one day that I hadn't even thought about drinking and I thought, "how cool is this?" I didn't go a day without drinking until I came to AA. I takes patience! I was told, "you can't think your way to positive action, you have to act your way to positive thinking." Living life isn't always conducive to positive thinking but I can change those negative thoughts into positive thoughts by never forgetting how it used to be. Thanks to God and AA, I haven't had to drink today. One Day at a Time.
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Old 12-23-2014, 02:04 PM
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Hi ErJoy

It undeniably does get easier...not many of us would be here if it didn't

It takes a little time tho to rebuild ourselves and our lives. 33 days is great but it's just over a month since your last drink....give it a little time and patience. Stay the course.

It'll be ok

D
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