Went to bar with friends

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11-17-2014, 12:13 AM

# 41 (permalink)

RobbyRobot

Adventures In SpaceTime

Join Date: Jun 2008

Location: Ottawa, Canada

Posts: 5,827

Quote:

Originally Posted by soberlicious

No, not when it comes to fear of drinking. I control whether I put alcohol in my body, that choice is not made by others for me. Of course I've grown in many ways since I quit 8 years ago, but sorry, no I've always had the mindset that places don't make me drink, being around alcohol doesn't make me drink. I don't drink because I made that choice and as a living, thinking human being I can decide to abide by that choice regardless of my physical locale at any given moment. After all, there is a 7-11 on every corner. If I wanted to drink, a bar would be the last place I would go.

Fears, of whatever nature for me, always require a remarkable working thru process. My addiction mentality never much played out rationally for me and so although intellectually I could see the folly of my projections, it took actual sober emotional experience to build my new lifestyle choices into a practical and doable life. There are distinct differences for me when I'm being courageous and when I'm simply being intelligent against whatever irrational fears, such as a return to drinking. My own forever choice to stay quit wasn't based on keeping or being sober as much as totally based on my refusal to die as a useless, suffering, lousy drunk. So for me, people/places/situations became gradually unimportant as my experience in sobriety came into its own. I in fact yet had deeper non-addiction related fears to rationally deal with in getting back to sanity. Took me awhile, lol.

Quote:

Originally Posted by soberlicious

Quote:

Originally Posted by RobbyRobot

Having now asked, I want to make clear I believe you absolutely have achieved real freedom from your addictions.

Well gee thanks. That's nice and all, but not necessary. I don't have a problem saying I'm confident in my abstinence.

Yeah okay, my belief statement wasn't about the quality of your confidence in your own abstinence. I was making clear my own affirmations of my understanding of your experiences. Cheers.

11-17-2014, 04:22 AM

# 42 (permalink)

MiniBK

Member

Join Date: Jan 2014

Location: UK

Posts: 100

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeanChev

I've been going out to the bar twice a week to shoot darts, I shoot on a league on Monday nights, and a friend of mine on the team, we go out every Thursday to practice, and I have been drinking only soda, and water and I definitely have a way better time hanging out. I've even taken my friend home because he drank too much, it felt good to be the DD, and go home and spend the rest of the evening with my wife and 2 month old son instead of being drunk, puking, and passing out, leaving my wife to take care of our son by herself. I'm going strong on 3 weeks sober right now, and I'm enjoying every minute of it.

Nice one Dean. Just concentrate on the good feeling of being in total control of your life, being able to do what you want and when you want, without worrying about Alcohol.

11-17-2014, 05:59 AM

# 43 (permalink)

anattaboy

Member

Join Date: May 2014

Location: Washington, MO

Posts: 2,306

My first home group in Johnson City TN had an old-timer who kept a stocked bar for entertaining. Not many followed his lead but back then I was ok with my wife keeping a six of Michelob in the fridge (it took her sometimes 2 weeks to drink it). I was 29 back then and there were other younger members that wanted to have fun sober so we started an activity committee and did a float trip, a couple good concerts and midnite bowling. Lotsa drunks at all these places but we traveled as a sober unit and it worked well. It is not my habit to hang with drunks--The dialogue is too predictable and circular.