My wife is leaving me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Clarkesville, Ga.
Posts: 40
My wife is leaving me.
I can't blame her. I want her to be happy and she can't be living with a drunk. We have been married for 26 yrs. I can't imagine life witout her. I read somewhere a alcoholic hurts the ones they love the most and I am tired of hurting her. The last six years everything bad that has happened in my life was brought on by alcohol. When I meet her this morning to sign the papers to start the divorce , I told her that this time I am going to quit for good. Not in a attempt to get her to stay but for me.I am tired of bad things happening because of drinking. So I am working my way through day one.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 55
26 is a long time so anything I say should be taken with a grain of salt since my longest relationship was 3 years.
I was with a women who I hurt her feeling while drinking. I kept saying I was going to quit but never did. She took a step back from our relationship and I embraced alcohol and blamed her for not sticking by me. I then stopped talking to her for a time.
After I got over the breakup feeling I continued to drink for a few more months.
Then I decided I need to quit for me and any future relationships.
You have to live now for yourself and for your future now. if she does leave you for real then let her. Maybe you can meet up with her some other time in life but you might always carry that pain in your heart she caused you. In a sense I think significant others should stick it out with their mate in trouble but for some reason many leave. Don't even ponder it. Cry it out then build your house again but start with you.
I was with a women who I hurt her feeling while drinking. I kept saying I was going to quit but never did. She took a step back from our relationship and I embraced alcohol and blamed her for not sticking by me. I then stopped talking to her for a time.
After I got over the breakup feeling I continued to drink for a few more months.
Then I decided I need to quit for me and any future relationships.
You have to live now for yourself and for your future now. if she does leave you for real then let her. Maybe you can meet up with her some other time in life but you might always carry that pain in your heart she caused you. In a sense I think significant others should stick it out with their mate in trouble but for some reason many leave. Don't even ponder it. Cry it out then build your house again but start with you.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome SB. Glad to hear you are making the change now, even though much may seem lost. You will be amazed at how much good can happen once you start living a sober life, best of luck on your journey and use SR as much as you can for support along the way.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
I am glad that you have committed to getting sober, and I am sorry for this loss.
I found out 10 years ago that my wife was cheating on me (again, if it ever even stopped after I discovered the circumstance 4 years earlier), and I ended a 21 year marriage.
I married my college Sweetheart a year later, and we have been remarkably blessed.
My wife and I celebrated our 9th anniversary last night.
My point is that, in my life, everytime a door has shut in (or on) my life, a better door has opened for me.
Please keep us posted on your progress (and travails).
Take care.
I found out 10 years ago that my wife was cheating on me (again, if it ever even stopped after I discovered the circumstance 4 years earlier), and I ended a 21 year marriage.
I married my college Sweetheart a year later, and we have been remarkably blessed.
My wife and I celebrated our 9th anniversary last night.
My point is that, in my life, everytime a door has shut in (or on) my life, a better door has opened for me.
Please keep us posted on your progress (and travails).
Take care.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
you know people who go through situations like the one you now find yourself in and remain sober are incredibly inspiring to me. I cannot fathom being in your shoes and remaining sober. I know folks who have had spouses pass away and they remain sober. I've seen people go through some terrible stuff and remain sober. Hearing those stories gives other people a lot of hope and courage.
My point to you is that which doesnt kill us only makes us stronger. You pull through this and you get to the other side you'll be a better stronger you and you'll be a light in the darkness to many others. You'll also be a lot happier too.
My point to you is that which doesnt kill us only makes us stronger. You pull through this and you get to the other side you'll be a better stronger you and you'll be a light in the darkness to many others. You'll also be a lot happier too.
Living Sober
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 555
Hey sb1969- That's some rough stuff, however you have found a place where there's a lot of support.
I, myself, have damaged some previous relationships due to booze. None which were as long as yours, however they were still some very hard times for me. I was still drinking at that time, and continued to, even afterwards, for years.
I think it's great that you're taking a very bad situation, and turning it into something more positive, by facing the real problem and doing something to correct it. That takes some real strength, which I applaud you for.
I think at the end of the day, we all feel the same way sooner or later.
I wish you well and I hope to see you around.
Lusher
I, myself, have damaged some previous relationships due to booze. None which were as long as yours, however they were still some very hard times for me. I was still drinking at that time, and continued to, even afterwards, for years.
I think it's great that you're taking a very bad situation, and turning it into something more positive, by facing the real problem and doing something to correct it. That takes some real strength, which I applaud you for.
I am tired of bad things happening because of drinking.
I wish you well and I hope to see you around.
Lusher
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